


Color Me Blue

by EvieWhite



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst for sure, Bisexuality, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Mild Language, SuperCorp, a roller-coaster ride of love and emotions, cute gay babies, fighting to friends, karaoke is involved at some point, kinda slow burn, love and support, redk, worst mother in law in the history of earth and krypton
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-02
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-03 18:15:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 56,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8725045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvieWhite/pseuds/EvieWhite
Summary: Kara Danvers feels like a complete and total idiot. She betrayed the trust of Lena Luthor, the woman who's smile makes her head spin, and now she's gone off to save The Flash's earth before apologizing or even saying thank you. Once Kara gets back to her earth, can she find a way to make it up to her 'friend' and sort out some of her very confusing feelings for the beautiful Luthor? She might need to get creative if she plans on winning Lena back.





	1. A Confidence Boost on Earth 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sort of a fix-it fic after the events of Medusa that evolved into so much more! It just felt so wrong that Kara didn't even thank Lena, on camera anyways, for saving the life of every single alien in National City and then went to the Flash's Earth without a word. This starts by addressing that ooc behavior and then covers Kara opening up about her sexuality, trying to win Lena back, dealing with loss and love and being a superhero.
> 
> Title taken from "Blue" by Troye Sivan. I think it's kinda fitting for this situation.

Soft music from the live band fills the small, comfortable space around us. There's a pleasant buzz of conversation from the other patrons, laughter and light hearted banter, as everyone in the bar drinks and unwinds after a long day, and Rao knows, we've all had a long day.

This weird, mashed up team actually did it! We managed to pull together, a dysfunctional family, and defeated the Dominators. Not that I had any doubts we would but, we did it, we saved this earth! Now, I think we could all use a drink before heading home to our respective worlds and the teams waiting for us there.

It was Sara's idea. She saw how tired and stressed we all were and, decided that this would be just what we need. "Here you go everybody!" She passes out drinks to the whole gang before plopping down next to me. I think she's right. "First round is on me, Oliver gets the next."

"Hey!" The green arrow says with a mischievous grin. "I never agreed to that!" Sara just shrugs, smiling widely.

The group of us must look slightly out of place here but, we all relax and ease into light conversation. For hours we just joke and laugh, learning more about each other and telling wild stories about other villains we've faced and battles we've won. It's a great way to spend my last night in this time line and I'm grateful for the new friendships I've made.

As the night goes on, we slowly start to disburse and I'm left thinking more and more about a certain "friend" waiting at home for me. I shouldn't have left her like that. Truly, I feel awful about it, and it weighs heavy on my shoulders. Lena... I care about her so deeply and I know she cares for me too but, she trusted me and I betrayed that trust. I exploited our relationship and used her, just like everyone else in her life. How can I go back to her and say that I'm different when I'm no better than them?

I need to find a way to make this up to her, let her know how sorry I am and how much she means to me. What exactly does she mean to me though? My feelings for the Luthor are all mixed up and blurry, like a photo that is just out of focus. Every time I think I have her figured out, she surprises me. Everything about her is strangely alluring; the way she bites her lip when she looks at me, how she's one of the strongest people I know yet always seems to be in need of hug, how she pours over her work in the name of the greater good to escape her last name, just everything about her! Why can't get her out of my head?

"You okay, Kara?" Sara, the only one left besides Barry and I, places a hand on my shoulder and asks with concern. "You look a little lost."

"Oh, yeah, it's nothing. Just thinking about my earth, I guess."

"Mhmm." White Canary does not look convinced. "Well, you can talk about it if you want."

I take a large sip of my drink. Even though the alcohol doesn't affect me, this one tastes good and provides the illusion of inhibition. "Hey." Biting my lip, I swallow hard and try to phrase this better than it sounds in my head. "You're bisexual right?"

For a moment Sara looks taken aback and I'm afraid I've gone too far, but then the hero breaks out a huge smile and I breathe a sigh of relief. "Yeah, why do you ask?"

"But you prefer girls, right? I mean, that's what I heard anyways."

"I do, who wouldn't?" She says it with such confidence that a pang of envy pops up in my chest and I'm not entirely sure why. "But I'm still bisexual. You don't have to like guys and girls in a 50/50 ratio, you know what I mean? It's not a percentage for me, I just like who I like, and most of the time it just so happens that that person is a woman."

"So even if you've liked and dated guys before, and still are attracted to them but, then you meet this one woman who is brilliant and beautiful and exactly the kind of person you want to be with, that's okay? I don't know, I think I'm just confused. It's like, I can't tell the difference between if I admire her, value her friendship, or want to kiss her... Rao, this is stupid!"

"Kara, you can date 1000 guys and 1 girl and still be bisexual. You get to decide what the label means to you, not the other way around."

"And Kara," Barry chimes in. "Don't let society or preconceived notions of right and wrong dictate who you want to be with. If you like her and she likes you, whats the problem?"

Ugh, what IS the problem? The problem is that I fucked up. I knew Lena had feelings for me and I still betrayed her trust. I'm terrified that I blew any shot I had with her. Seriously, why would she want me after I basically accused her of being evil and trying to commit mass murder? I know I had good intentions, I was trying to save lives, but her words "I thought you were different" well they cut me to the core.

"Just do what feels right to you and fuck the rest." Solid advice White Canary. I'm fairly certain I said pretty much the same thing to Alex when she was struggling, so why can't I listen to it myself?

"I know this is an insanely stupid question, but I have to ask, I can't text from here right? Like I can't send a text and have it go to my earth?"

Barry gives me a boyish grin, laughing and shaking his head. "If we could, don't you think I would have just sent you a quick text like: Hey Supergirl hows it going? If you're not busy or anything, could you maybe come help save this earth please? Smiley face emoji."

Sara and I both laugh at his silly, fake texting gestures and wacky facial expressions. It feels good, now that I finally got all of that off my chest but, the thought of facing Lena tomorrow is still heavy in the back of my mind.

Finishing the last of our drinks, Sara slams her palms down on the table as she gets up. "Okay kids, time to call it a night. Supergirl, it was really great getting to know you but, I think it's time you got back to your lady friend on your earth." The White Canary claps me on the back and smiles widely as I blush. "Oh, and if you have a sister, please give her my number!"

"Will do." Without thinking much, I pull the hero into a tight hug and whisper sincerely. "Thank you."

The next morning, I wake up in my own bed, in my own house, on my own earth, and I miss my new friends, but I couldn't be happier to be home. Today is going to be a big day! I have to go to L Corp, find Lena, bare my soul to her, and pray to Rao that she can forgive me. Let's see how that goes...


	2. Not So Welcome Home

It's December in National City and most of the citizens are bundled from head to toe in thick winter jackets and long wool scarves. I guess that's why most of the people in the street are eyeing me strangely as I walk briskly towards the L Corp headquarters, I forgot my jacket! I may be immune to the cold but, my arms are covered in goosebumps anyway. However, I think that has nothing to do with the weather and everything to do with a certain beautiful brunette.

I woke up this morning with newfound determination, my talk with Sara and Barry giving me the confidence boost I needed. Yet with every step closer to Lena Luthor my heart thuds louder in my chest and I begin to rethink this plan.

Lena must be furious with me, I mean she has every reason to be. Why would she respond well to me showing up at her office unannounced? I know I'm not the most tactical person, historically speaking, but wow this plan really has no finesse at all! Great idea Danvers, just walk right up to her and say: Thanks for saving my life, sorry I doubted you and used our relationship to get information! Forgive me please, and maybe kiss me if you want to, yeah that would be nice.

Nope, not the best idea I've ever had. On the other hand, I tried to be sneaky with Lena once before and look how well that turned out. Maybe being direct is the better approach? Ugh, I don't know!

Before this whole mess, Lena and I would bring each other lunch fairly often, almost every day. We said it was because we got so caught up in our work that we would forget to eat if we didn't but, I'm fairly certain it was just an excuse to see each other. Also, I've never missed or forgotten a meal ever in my entire life. 

The little corner cafe only a block from Lena's office catches my eye. It smells amazing, like fresh baked bread and toasted spices. That's what I'll do, no faster way to someone's heart than with food right? I quickly stop in and order the usual, plus two brownies as a treat. Who could resist brownies? I definitely couldn't!

The wait on the elevator from the first floor to Lena's office at the top is longest in my life. Each floor seems to tick by slower than a snail with ankle weights. Do snails even have ankles? Oh Rao, why do I always do this? Whenever I'm anxious my mind decides to wander and ramble the most ridiculous things. My cheeks burn bright red as I remember how Lena once told me that was cute. Lets hope she still thinks it is because I have a feeling rambling is in my near future.

"Hi, Jess, how's it going? Is Lena busy, I brought her lunch?" I finally reach Lena's floor, just one more small obstacle, her assistant. 

"Hello Miss Danvers, I'm sorry to inform you but, Miss Luthor has already taken lunch today and she has a full schedule of meetings until late this evening." The assistant and I had a rocky start but we had become some what friends, friendly if nothing else, but now Jess stands with her arms crossed, seeming annoyed and bothered by my presence. "This really isn't a good time. Where were you with lunch two weeks ago." It's not a question, more of an accusation, and it makes me stiffen.

Out saving the world for your information won't do, so I settle on. "Busy."

"Well Miss Luthor is busy now, so you'll have to come back at another time or try calling her personally."

"I'm sorry Jess but, didn't Lena say I could come in whenever I wanted, no matter what was going on?"

"Things have changed." Jess sighs, rolling her eyes like she just doesn't have time for this. "Listen Kara, this is above my pay grade. I don't know what happened between you two, and frankly I'm not interested, but if she's ready to see you she'll let you know. Right now, I'm not allowed to let you in and I like my job, so just call her okay?"

My heart drops with each word she says. I knew Lena would be upset, but I didn't expect this. I feel my head starting to spin, thinking of every possible scenario, and my chest tightens with anxiety. "Okay." I say, voice shaky and cracking. "Can you give her this and let her know I stopped by?"

"Of course." Jess says sympathetically, taking the bag of food from me. 

Heading back down the hallway, feeling defeated and small, I decide to linger for a moment longer. Using my x-ray vision, I peek through into Lena's office. Jess has given her the lunch already and Lena is sitting behind her desk examining it. I can't tell her exact facial expression, but it seems as if Lena's in pain. I can hear her heart beating erratically and her breath hitch. She drops her head into her hands, rubbing roughly at her tired eyes.

I can't leave like this! An idea hits me like a speeding train and I dash into the stairwell to see it through. If Lena won't see Kara, maybe she'll see Supergirl!

Snow crunches under my dark red boots as I land on Lena Luthor's balcony. The harsh breeze throws my long hair around my face, in what I'm sure looks completely ridiculous, but I can't exactly tie it back. Taking a quick second to straighten myself, I notice Lena through the glass of her window. She looks so so beautiful, but so lost. 

Her head is still in her hands and mountains of paperwork surround her normally perfectly organized desk. There's a blanket on her couch, complete with pillows, making me think this office has become more of her home as of late and my heart breaks because of it. I wish I could have been here sooner, I really do. Being a Superhero sucks sometimes.

Before I over analyze any more than I already have, I gently knock on the door to her office, hoping not to startle her too much. Lena picks her head up at the sound and for a split second she looks thrilled, hope and happiness lift the tiredness from her eyes and my heart starts to flutter, but the relief is short lived."

The CEO is out of her chair, glaring at me with crossed arms and a carefully placed cold expression. "How many times do I have to tell you, that is not an entrance." Lena's tone is icy but she opens the sliding glass door anyway.

"I know, I'm sorry, I just really needed to talk to you." Cautiously I walk further into the pristine white office. Lena stiffens at my advance and takes a step back.

"It's been two weeks since the incident, what could you possibly have to say now?" Her voice is accusatory and I know she's right. For a brief moment, the mask she's so carefully arranged slips, and I see the real hurt and pain behind her eyes. 

"Lena, I am so sorry. I would have come earlier if I could, but the earth was in danger and I had to go. I wanted to thank you sooner, I really did. Lena you saved us... you saved all of us."

"Damn right I did, no thanks to you."

"Lena-"

She cuts me off again, voice raised slightly and hands clenched into fists at her side. "No Supergirl, just leave it. I'm a Luthor, remember, you don't think I'm worth your time."

"That's not-"

"You might have fooled everyone else in this city, you even had me for a while. I trusted you! But it seems you could never afford a Luthor the same courtesy. Now if you'd please, I have business to attend to." Lena gestures to the balcony and I have nothing to say that would make her change her mind.

As I walk back outside, head hanging low and stomach in knots, I want nothing more than to wrap the woman before me in my arms and tell her how sorry I am, how much she means to me. Glancing back at her, before I take to the sky, I say softly, "Everyone has the potential to do amazing good and terrible evil, even me. For all the good I've done, you wouldn't believe the bad. I'm sorry I made you think, even for one second, that I only see your potential to do harm. Because in all honesty, you're the best person I know. I hope you can forgive me."

Lena's brilliant green eyes well up with tears, making her bite her lip hard and turn away from me so that I don't see them fall. Waiting for a minute, Lena doesn't say anything or turn back, so reluctantly I lift off into the December air. When she thinks I can't tell, I feel her gaze burning into my back as I fly away.

This isn't the end, I'm nothing if not persistent, and I'll find a way to get Lena back. I have to.


	3. Detectives Give Good Advice

The dim lighting and slow, almost sad, music that fills the alien safe haven is a perfect compliment to my grey, discouraged mood. A haze of smoke hangs over the bar and the thick smell of alcohol overwhelms my senses as I swirl empty peanut shells across the dark counter top. After my fight with Lena as Supergirl, I thought of going home, consuming an ungodly amount of ice cream, calling Alex, and sleeping as long as my body would allow, but instead I found myself here.

The Zakarian Ale burns pleasantly as it slides down my throat, the second of the evening. I see myself reflected briefly in the amber liquid, blue eyes swimming with uncertainty and confusion, and force myself to swallow the rest in one large gulp.

"Kara?" A familiar voice greets my ears and a small but strong hand is placed on my shoulder. "Didn't expect to find you here, Alex says you're not really a drinker."

"I'm not." I manage to reply through giggles. My hands grip the rough wood of the bar stool so I don't tip over. I may not be drunk, but I'm certainly not sober. Even though I'm laughing, tears are barely staying in my eyes and my heart aches with the strain of holding them in. This is all so new to me and I don't like it, not one bit.

Maggie sits at the bar next to me, raising an eyebrow and watching me carefully. At first, I wanted to throw her straight into outer space, but she and Alex have come a long way. I truly appreciate everything she's done for my sister and have warmed up to them dating. I've actually come to enjoy the detective's company, but we're not particularly close.

"Okay Little Danvers, what's wrong?" Maggie gives me a knowing look as I order another alien alcohol.

Leaning over the bar, I stare down into the amber liquid, shoulders hunched and muscles tensed. "It's complicated..." I take a long drink, tipping my head back until there's nothing left. I go to order another, but Maggie gives the bartender this look at that screams murder making her back away slowly with my glass left empty. "Hey?" I protest weakly but I know she's right. "Thanks."

"Have you at least talked to Alex about it?"

"No." I say cautiously. "I can't."

"You and your sister tell each other everything. She takes your calls no matter what, believe me, I know. No matter what it is, Alex will be there for you."

I wince at Maggie's words, biting my lip until I feel the sharp jolt of pain that brings me back to the present. "It's not that... Alex has given up so much for me already, I don't want her to think I'm trying to take the spotlight off of her when finally, for the first time in her life, she has something that is just hers.

Maggie rubs my back in small circles and I lean into the almost sisterly touch. "Alex would never think that. She's the most understanding person in National City. But if it helps, you can start by telling me."

I take a deep breath, letting the slightly smoky air fill my lungs as I try to clear my mind of the fuzz of alcohol. "I like a girl." I say so fast that the words blur together.

"Try again, honey." Maggie encourages gently.

"I like a girl." By the grace of Rao, I manage to speak clearly. Maggie's eyebrows shoot up at the admission, but to her credit, at least she doesn't choke on her drink. "I like this beautiful, intelligent, intimidating, strong, powerful girl and I've managed to mess things up before they even really began. She's had a rough life ya know, like a really really rough life, but somehow she's managed to be this incredible force for good. She's just... I just really like this girl. So I went to apologize to her for what I did, but I think I just made things worse? And I can't tell Alex, because being gay is Alex's thing and I can't do that to her again."

"Kara." Maggie regards me with soft brown eyes, that seem to bare straight into me with intimate understanding. "You need to talk to Alex about this, I promise she'll understand."

"Not yet." My voice sounds small and cracks under the intense weight of my emotions. "What should I do?"

"Well does this girl like you back?"

"No...yes? Well, I think she did, but I've gone and ruined things, and how can she possibly forgive me when I was so horrible? If I'm being honest, I've had feelings for her since we first met. She hit me like a whirl wind, Maggie!" I feel my face heating up and my typically sunny demeanor returning the more I talk about the object of my affections. Then I remember that she doesn't want to see me and my face falls again.

"Well, how bad was the fight?"

"Bad? Bad." I put my head in my hands and sigh heavily. "She wasn't ready to hear my apology and I knew that, but I just wanted her back in my life so badly. The thing is, she's been hurt so much that I don't think my words really mean anything, so I have to find a way to show her with my actions. And there are still a lot of things about me I have to keep secret for now."

"Want me to be honest, Little Danvers?" I nod eagerly and Maggie claps me on the back. "I may not be an expert at family stuff, but just talk to Alex, okay? About this girl, I do have my fair share of experience with fucking a good thing up before it even starts, so my advice would be to come clean. Start with your feelings for her and just tell her everything, lay it all on the line and pray to jesus that she understands. Flowers never hurt either."

"Really?" I lay my head on Maggie's shoulder, still a little woozy from drinking, but definitely feeling better.

"It's easier said than done, but you're brave right? Just go for it, Lil Danvers."

"I never expected a human, other than Alex, to be able to understand me so well and have so many similar life experiences." my eyes go wide when I realize just how I phrased that. "Um, ya know, I meant like a human woman... as in, still a human but not a man."

I cringe at my own awkwardness, expecting Maggie to be staring at me with wide eyes. The cop just gives me this knowing look and shakes her head. "What ever you say, kid."

"Thank you, Maggie."

"Hey you two. Didn't expect to see you here, Kara. What are you guys talking about?" My sister comes over with drinks for her and her girlfriend. She looks back and forth between me and Maggie with one quirked eyebrow, almost confused by our closeness but definitely happy.

"I was just helping your totally human sister with her totally normal relationship problems."

"Maggie!" We both shout, making the latina hold her hands up in surrender.

"You knew?" Alex has her hands on her hips, looking genuinely perplexed.

Rolling her eyes, Maggie just laughs and smiles widely. "Why do I have to keep reminding you? I'm a detective, I detect!"

A buzzing at my hip distracts me from my sister and her girlfriend, and I pull out my phone to make sure it's not an emergency. 'Lena Luhtor' flashes across the screen with the little heart emoji next to her name and I freeze. I feel my heart leap in my chest and my palms start to sweat. It's just a text, but my fingers tremble as I press the glowing screen and open the message.

"Thank you for lunch, Kara. I really appreciate it. Have a goodnight."

It's not much, but it's an olive branch I will gladly take. "You're welcome, Lena. I'm glad you liked it. Sleep well and hopefully see you soon?"

"Sleep? What is that?" My face almost hurts from how wide I'm smiling. My chest feels lighter and airy, and I can't help but squeak as I read the text. Alex watches me curiously and tries to read over my shoulder but Maggie playfully slaps her arm.

"Lol well I guess don't work too late then."

"I'll do my best. No promises. Night Kara."

"Night Lena." 

I put my phone away, still grinning widely from the brief, but happy exchange. "Do we have something to talk about?" Alex says in her signature big-sister tone. Looking at Maggie for advice, she nods and gestures for me to get it over with. 

"I think so..."

At the end of a very long conversation and many difficult questions later, the three of us are hugging with teary eyes. I go to bed thinking of how lucky I am to have Alex for a sister, and how lucky she and Maggie are to have found each other. When I close my eyes, I see Lena smiling at me as I finally fall asleep.


	4. Plumerias and Planning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, okay guys, thank you so much for all of the comments! They really make my day, you have no idea. Now, this chapter is much longer than the others because it kind of took on a mind of its own, but I promise you'll like it. Thank you for reading!

The ocean air stings my lips with salt as I soar through the clear blue sky, just inches above crystal blue waters. My cape billows in the wind behind me, making my wild blonde locks whip around and my cheeks sting from the force of it. Flying is always harder by the sea, but infinitely more beautiful.

The wide blue expanse seems to stretch on and on in every direction. It unfolds before me, wave after wave, until all I can see is the misty spray of sea foam.

Breathing in deeply, I let the salt saturated air fill my lungs and every one of my senses. The first time I ever saw the ocean, I was 14. Alex took me for a day at the beach, filled with volleyball and ice cream and soaking in the glory of the yellow sun. At least that's what she planned, but when we got there I couldn't move.

I was equally amazed and terrified of this planet's ocean. It's just so big! I remember standing there in awe for what felt like the whole day, just watching the incredible pull of the tide at the shore. Alex managed to coax me in, just enough so that I could still stand. It was one of the first days that I knew for sure Alex and I would be inseparable, that our love for each other was boundless, kind of like the ocean, but it was also one of the days that I felt most like an alien.

It's always kind of in the back of my mind, this little voice that sounds eerily like Red Kryptonite Kara, whispering that I do not belong here. Reminding me that I am in fact an alien. I feel so human sometimes, so utterly vulnerable, that I almost forget.

There's only two people in this world who make me completely forget that the two separate parts of me are not yet one harmonious whole. The first is my sister Alex, my soulmate. And the other...well the other is Lena Luthor.

Lena and I could talk for hours, about everything and anything. We discussed things ranging from art and politics, religion, the overwhelming feeling of abandonment that occasionally creeps up on the both of us out of no where, to stupid cartoons we watched as children and the proper utensil needed for eating macaroni and cheese. Trick question by the way, there is no right utensil as long as the food makes it safely into your mouth. Lena is a firm believer in the fork-only method. I can respect that.

Shaking my head, I laugh at myself and look back down into the murky depths of the ocean. See, even now, 1000 miles apart and fighting, she manages to make me feel like, well, me.

Sighing, I dip the fingertips of my free hand into the icy water. It sends a wave through my body and I pick up the pace. On the horizon, I can see the sun beginning to set. A gorgeous display of oranges and reds paint the sky, with a dash of pink streaking straight through the middle. I'll take this as a good sign. My mother always said that a beautiful sunset signified a beautiful tomorrow; and that is exactly what I'm hoping for, a beautiful tomorrow with Lena. Maybe I'm jumping the gun though?

I clutch the package I'm carrying closer to my chest, to protect it from the increasing winds as I pick up speed and distract me from my thoughts. This is the whole reason I flew out here in the first place. Not a single flower shop in National City carried the precious flower. Though they could be ordered, the fastest delivery time was 2 weeks and that just wouldn't do. Maggie said girls like flowers, and I just so happen to know exactly which flowers my girl likes. Of course they have to be extremely rare and only native to the distant island chain of Hawaii, but Lena is worth the effort.

As much as I enjoy flying over the ocean and watching the sunset, getting lost in my thoughts, Lena should be getting ready to leave the office now and I don't want to loose my window of opportunity. National City is only a few hundred more miles away, and I manage to land safely in the deserted alley behind my building after no more than 10 minutes, thankfully with the plumeria's still intact.

I head up to my apartment, the strain from flying so much finally sinking into my bones. The muscles on my neck and shoulders ache and scream for a rest, so I happily oblige with a hot shower. With the towel still up in my hair and feeling refreshed yet anxious, I hover my fingers over the keyboard of my phone.

"Hey Lena, I'm sure you've had a long day, but are you up for some company?"

Biting my nails, I anxiously await a response. I thought of just dropping by again, but it seems like Lena needs some space and I'm trying my best to respect that. But it's hard! I'm the kind of person who wants to fix things right away. I don't like to dwell too long on negative emotions or events and try to put it past me as quickly as possible, even if that means not fully digesting my feelings which is not exactly healthy.

Exactly three minutes later I get a response, though it is not precisely what I wanted, but I'll take it. "I don't know Kara..."

"It's okay if you say no, I understand." I quickly type again. "Honestly, I just really miss you Lena. Like A LOT."

Her response takes longer this time, like she's choosing her words carefully, maybe erasing then typing the same text over and over again. When I finally see the words flash across my screen, my heart races with happiness. "I miss you too, Kara. You are my only friend in National City after all."

Friend! That's a solid start considering she didn't want to see me just a few days ago. I'll take what I can get. "So can I stop by your apartment? I promise I won't be too long, I just have something for you."

"For me? Okay, but I hope you know I'm already in pajamas and I refuse to change."

"Lol fair enough! See you in ten."

Lena's apartment, I've been there a few times but never quite long enough to get fully comfortable. After an interview that ran late, or whatever excuse I was using to see her that day, we would sometimes go back there for a drink and a reason to keep talking. Lena likes dark wood and modern furniture. Her taste is very different from my sunny and fuzzy approach to interior design, yet somehow equally as charming.

I find myself standing in front of her solid door, hand hovering just above the ornate Victorian knocker. I accidentally clutch the flowers just a little too tight and the thorn that would have gone straight through any humans skin, crumbles to dust on the hard word floor. "Crap." I mumble under my breath, fumbling to rearrange them so they don't look smushed.

Before I can get myself together, the door swings open and I freeze. Lena is standing there smirking, with her eyebrows raised and hands on her hips. She looks sassy and beautiful and so, so lovely, but something about her is different since the last time I saw her as Kara, and I can't quite put my finger on it. "I thought I heard someone out here-" She cuts herself off as she sees the bouquet in my hands, which I hastily thrust in her general direction.

"Here, I know they're your favorite so I got them for you as a kind of peace offering and please-forgive-me present. And they're really hard to find, like REALLY hard to find, because they're super rare and beautiful, just like you, but I guess you already knew that and I guess I'm rambling now so I'm gonna stop, please stop me..."

"Kara." Lena's brilliant green eyes are wide as she looks at me with what appears to be awe. "They're beautiful, thank you." She takes them from me and holds them under her nose, breathing in their rich, sweet smell. As she closes her eyes and takes another deep breath, I notice her fingers trembling ever so slightly and she's gripping the green ribbon so hard that her fingertips are white.

"Lena-"

"Here, come inside Kara." Lena cuts me off, snapping back to reality and placing her warm hand on my back, sending little shivers up my spine as she ushers me inside. She leads me too the kitchen, where she lays the flowers out on the table and begins cutting off the very bottoms so she can put them in water. "Wow Kara, they really are beautiful, and so fresh too! Where did you get them?"

"Feels like it was far as Hawaii." I say, chuckling at my private joke. Lena chuckles too and smiles softly at me. Her real smile, not the guarded one she first gave me at the door; the one that makes my knees weak.

"Can I get you some wine?"

"No thank you, not tonight."

Lena shrugs and pours herself a glass of red wine. It splashes against her already dark red stained lips and her pink tongue darts out to catch it. I watch her closely, probably obviously. I watch the curve of her jaw as she takes another sip and the delicate turn of her wrist as she puts the glass back down. I watch the little vein at the crook of her neck beat faster as she watches me too, green eyes raking up and down my slightly tensed frame.

Without thinking, I lunge forward and wrap my arms around her shoulders tightly. Lena gasps in response to the sudden movement and I'm terrified I made the wrong move, but after a couple long seconds, the only good Luthor relaxes into my embrace. Her arms snake around my waist, pulling me even closer and burying her face in the crook of my neck.

"I missed you." I whisper into her dark chocolate hair. She smells like expensive perfume and red wine and something else that is uniquely her, something that makes my head swim. "I missed you Lena, and I am so, so sorry."

"You know, you're the only person who calls me Lena." The brilliant genius pulls back, hands lingering at my hips. She looks so vulnerable, lip between her teeth and fingers still shaking. She doesn't want me to notice, but I can feel the subtle vibrations even through the thicker fabric of my jeans. "And you don't have to apologize. I'm the one who made it personal, I'm the one who read into things too much."

I want to stop her and ask her exactly what she means by that, read into it too much? But I bite my tongue because she deserves to get this out with any interruptions. 

"You were just being a reporter. It's your job to find the big stories and do whatever you can to chase the truth, I should have understood that. I guess... I guess I'm just so used to people getting close to me to get what they want, to steal project designs or get the latest scoop that I automatically assumed that's what you were doing." My heart breaks at her words and I realize just how much pain I must have put her through. Then Lena gestures to the flowers with tears welled up in her eyes and my heart breaks for entirely different reasons. "But it's clearly not. You're nothing like them, in fact, you're nothing like anyone else I've ever known."

I see it in her eyes, this pleading, almost begging look, seeking desperately for confirmation. Automatically, I wrap Lena in my arms again and hold her tight. I feel her breathe heavily, body shuddering with a silent cry. "Lena, I am so sorry that I made you think I would ever hurt you like that. I genuinely like you for you; I don't want anything in return from our friendship other than your company. I just like spending time with you Lena, and if I never interview you again I can definitely live with that."

"Thank you, Kara." Lena says sincerely before leaning back and wiping her eyes. "Well I don't know about ever again, anyone else always paints a much darker picture of me than you do. Can't ruin my stellar reputation now can we?" She chuckles softly, trying to make light of the situation.

"Stellar reputation? Are we talking about the same woman?" I joke back and shove her shoulder lightly, making her laugh. I know we haven't worked this out completely, and definitely aren't where we were before all of this, but my heart is over joyed with the progress we made tonight. 

Glancing down at my watch, I notice the time. Midnight! Shit, I have work tomorrow and Snapper is going to actually kill me if he needs to edit simple grammar in another one of my articles because I was too tired to notice. This feels like a good place to end the conversation anyway, end on a high note, even though I pretty much never want to leave her side.

"I should get going; I didn't realize how late it got."

"Shit." Lena mumbles after looking at her clock. She stands up and helps me off the couch, somehow managing to finish her glass of wine in the process. "Thank you for the flowers."

"It was my pleasure."

"See you soon? I'm free this Friday if you want to grab lunch?" Lena bites her lip, looking at me with big, hopeful eyes. How could anyone possibly say no? This is what it must feel like for Alex when I pout!

"Lunch sounds amazing! I'll pick you up at 1?"

Lena nods eagerly as she walks me to the door. "Oh!" I'm half way out the door as I turn back around, digging in my pocket. I can't believe I almost forgot! "Supergirl asked me to give you this." Holding out the small flash drive, Lena narrows her eyes and takes it cautiously. "It was her idea, I just helped her with it. It won't go to print or anything if you don't want it to, she just wanted you to have it."

Nodding her head slightly, Lena pockets the flash drive, fingers trembling again. "Thank you again for tonight."

"Sweet dreams, Lena."

"Goodnight."

I fly home feeling lighter than the air that carries me.


	5. Danvers Support Group

I've read and re-read this stupid letter a thousand times since giving it to Lena, and I still can't figure out if it's the best thing I've ever written or the absolute worst. Judging by the fact that Lena hasn't said anything to me or Supergirl since I gave it to her three days ago, I'm going to have to go with the worst.

Lena and Kara seemed to patch things up and take a huge step forward, but Lena and Supergirl still have a long ways to go. This would be so much easier if I could just tell her who I am! It's extremely tempting, but at this point I think it would do more harm than good. Lena is hurt, and rightfully so, and I think if I told her right now she would take it as me having lied to her and not trusted her yet again.

Running my fingers through my messy hair, I turn my attention back to the computer screen. It casts a harsh glow across my lap, illuminating my cup of hot cocoa and rainbow pattern blanket. The title on the screen glares back at me even harsher: A Super And A Luthor: The Untold Story by Kara Danvers. Awful right? What was I thinking?

I guess I was thinking it would be the best way to let Lena know how much I appreciate everything she did, and how intimately I know the struggle she's going through with her mom. This way it's all in one go and I can apologize properly without her seeing me cry.

It was extremely strange to write. For hours I just sat there looking at a blank word document, wondering exactly how to even start. Eventually I put a mirror opposite myself and tried to make it like any other interview. I pictured Lena reading the answers and how she may respond to them; it could go one of two ways... It's worth a shot right?

I rub my forehead out of frustration and begin to read the article for what I'm promising myself is the last time tonight. A dull ache begins to form at my temples and I know I've got to stop. Thankfully, a knock at my door stops me from going any further after only a few sentences.

"Come in, Alex!" I don't even need to use my x-ray vision to know it's my sister, though I can hear the very slight crackle in her elbow as she swings the door open, from when she dislocated it playing softball in the ninth grade. She had been the pitcher, and a damn good one, but some giant of a girl smashed a line drive right into Alex's arm. At that time in my life I was still trying to get control of my powers, I was constantly hearing every little noise in a mile radius, and the sound of Alex's bone snapping gave me nightmares for months!

"Hey, why aren't you dressed yet?" Alex gestures to my over-sized t-shirt and panda pajama pants. I smile sheepishly and try not to make eye contact. "Oh come on! It was your idea to go out tonight and now you're not even dressed?"

"I don't know if I want to go out anymore... can't we just stay in and watch an entire season of Parks and Rec?"

Alex narrows her eyes at me, watching me the way she watches a suspect. "But you love karaoke night?"

"Yeah, but I love Leslie Knope more."

My sister takes a beer from the fridge and sits next to me on the couch with a slightly concerned gaze. She lightly runs her fingers through my hair, rubbing my scalp the way she knows will relax me. Slowly, the tension leaves my shoulders and I close my laptop screen, discarding the article to the back of my mind. "Are you okay Kara?"

It takes me a long time to answer. I genuinely don't know. I don't know how to merge the two parts of me all the time, how to be honest without giving away all my secrets, how to love someone and still be guarded. I'm a superhero, and I don't know how to fix things and that's terrifying. But I guess I don't need to have all the answers because I have people like Alex around to guide me.

"Not really." I finally say with a shaking voice. My fingers tremble as I fiddle with the hem of my shirt. "Alex, I..."

My sister and I are very different. When she's upset or going through something, she needs to know that I'm there for her and support her but she also needs physical space to work things out. On the other hand, I need constant physical contact and reassurance. I know it can be hard for Alex sometimes, but she always manages to give me what I need and I will never stop being grateful for that.

She gently pulls me close so that my head rests on her strong shoulders. She strokes my hair with one hand, while the other wraps itself firmly around me. I feel safe in her arms and take a deep breath to stop the rising tears.

"I think I love Lena Luthor." Despite herself, I feel my sister stiffen and hear her heart beat speed up. "You always say I'm too trusting, that I fall in love too hard and fast and easily, and I know you're right. I love the guy who delivers pizza for Rao's sake!" Alex snorts at that and kisses the top of my head. This is good, she hasn't yelled yet. "But the way I feel when I'm with her, it isn't like anything else! Alex, Lena makes me feel normal yet so, so special all at the same time. I don't know how she does it, but here I am, a superhero, reduced to a pile of mush because of her. I've already accepted that my feelings for her are romantic, and I won't be satisfied with just friendship, but I'm scared that once she knows who I really am she won't want anything to do with me."

"Kara," Alex says softly. "You are always a pile of mush."

Laughter bursts from my lips and I wipe the tears from my eyes. "I guess you're right."

She hugs me tighter, sighing into my hair. "If you ever ask me if I said this, I will deny it until the day I die but, despite popular opinion, I am not always right."

"I could of told you that." I mumble under my breath, earning a playful glare.

"I was wrong about Lena. She is a good person, morally grey at times but still good. But you Kara, you're the best person on this planet! Believe me. When you're Kara, and when you're Supergirl, you're still the same person. It's just that certain personality traits shine more in each role. If Lena is worthy of your love, she will be able to love every trait equally."

"Even the part that sent her mom to jail?"

"You still love me after what I did to Astra. We do the things we have to do to protect the ones we love." Alex bites her lip and glances down at me with worried eyes. "I would hold off on telling her you're Supergirl though, at least until she's had enough time to process everything that's happened."

Nodding in agreement, I hug my sister tight and then sit up. "It's just so hard! I'm ready for her to forgive me and I'll tell her how I really feel, then we'll make out and proceed to ride off into the sunset together."

We both laugh, Alex shaking her head at me. "Well, I hope it really works out like that."

"Me too... Is it too late to go to karaoke night?" 

Alex rolls her eyes at me, but I can see the smile she's trying so carefully to hide. "Maggie already got us a booth."

I squeal with excitement, bouncing up on my toes and clapping my hands together. "Thank you! You're the best big sister ever! I'll be ready in like two seconds." Technically, it only took me 1.7 seconds, but in no time at all Alex and I head out the door to sing and drink the night away.


	6. Wild

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd highly recommend listening to "Wild" by Troye Sivan before reading but you'll still get what I'm going for it you don't. Let me know what you think!

No amount of alcohol could make this singer sound good. Still, her enthusiasm and passion makes up for it a bit, and I get to my feet, clapping loudly while she takes a drunken bow. Stumbling back to her waiting, blushing date, the rest of the patrons laugh but the mood is still light and not judgmental at all. That's one of the things I love about this bar; you could literally come in here slathered in paint and covered in glitter and no one would judge you, they'd probably love it!

"Are you going to do that after every person, Little Danvers?" Maggie says with a playful roll of her eyes. 

"Even the bad ones? Any second longer and my ears would have been bleeding." Alex chimes in, smiling at her girlfriend with this adorable love sick puppy look.

"She wasn't that bad! Besides, she was happy and that makes me happy. So yes, I will clap for Every. Single. Person!"

They laugh, shaking their heads and sipping their beers. The first time we did this, went out just the three of us, I thought it would be awkward. I didn't want to be a third wheel, but it was a important to Alex so I swallowed my nerves and did it for her. Now I'm actually enjoying our bi-weekly get togethers. Who doesn't love karaoke? 

Ever since the other night, when Maggie gave me advice for Lena and revealed that she knows my secret, we've been closer too. I know I shouldn't get too attached, what if they break up, but I just can't help myself! Alex always says I'm a puppy and I'm starting to think she may be right.

"So, when are you going up there kid?" Maggie asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Not yet, I think there's like three more people ahead of me. When are you going?"

"Um, never?"

"Aw, come on! You guys could do a duet. It would be so cute!" Alex just rolls her eyes, but Maggie actually looks intrigued. Time to pull out the pout! But before I can get fully into it, Alex's brown eyes go wide and she slaps my arm. "What?"

Following her line of sight, my gaze falls on a beautiful woman across the bar. It can't be? Her long, raven hair falls in waves over her bare, smooth shoulders, and her legs seem to go on for days in those impossibly tight black jean. Her back is tuned to me so that I barely see her profile, but I can make out the sharp line of her jaw and that leaves no questions as to who it is. 

My breath catches in my throat and my palms immediately start to sweat. Lena Luthor is here, in a queer bar, where I'm about to go on stage and sing! Is this a dream or my worst nightmare? I have no idea!

"Oh shit!" Maggie says as she nearly chokes on her drink.

I'm practically hyperventilating over here. As she turns, Lena's emerald green eyes find mine instantly. For a second she looks surprised, but then I hear her heart speed up from all the way across the room and her face lights up. How do you tell someone that they have a grade one systolic heart murmur, and that the extra little flutter is one of the cutest noises on this planet, without sounding creepy?

"Oh my god, she is coming over here! What do I do? Alex help..." 

"Just be cool."

"Do you even know me, have I ever been cool, like even once in my whole life? No Alex, I have not!"

"Hey, just relax Little Danvers. This is just any other night."

"Any other night." I repeat, trying to calm my erratic breathing before she closes the gap between us. I wave eagerly, like an idiot, and Lena smiles even wider.

"Hi Kara." Her voice is all smooth and sultry and suddenly I'm useless. Her green silk button up blouse is undone just enough for me to see the slightly freckled skin of her chest, dipping my eyes dangerously low. "Didn't expect to see you here."

Alex kicks me under the table, and by the good graces of Rao I manage to sound somewhat put together. "I couldn't miss karaoke night, but I'm a bit surprised to see you here too. Come here often?"

Lena quirks her eyebrow, biting the corner of her bright red lips. "I'v been coming here for ages, sneaking out since I was a tiny, closeted teen. Plus they serve a mean martini."

It's like sirens go off in my head, making Lena swim in my vision. Our interactions always had a slightly flirtatious undertone. I only recently came to accept that my feelings for her where romantic, but had Lena been playing that angle all along? I'm hopelessly oblivious when it comes to this type of thing, someone could ask me out and I'd literally be like: oh wow, what a great new friend!

Some how this makes things worse! If Lena had been trying to show me she liked me before, which seems more likely now, and there's a real possibility that I was giving her mixed signals in return, my perceived betrayal must have stung a thousand times worse than I thought.

"Cheers to that!" Maggie jumps in, holding up her beer and effectively saving my dumb ass.

Chuckling lightly, Lena clinks her glass to Maggie's. "Oh, Lena this is Maggie Sawyer, my sister's girlfriend and NCPD detective. And you've already met Alex."

"Pleased to meet you Miss Sawyer." The two women shake hands and exchange a smile.

"No, no it' just Maggie. Nice to meet you too. Kara has told us so much about you."

"Has she really?" I can hear Lena's signature heart beat pick up again with surprise, but she carefully keeps her facial features neutral. "All good things I hope."

"Mostly." Alex replies with just a hint of sarcasm.

"Why don't you join us?" Maggie gestures to the open seat beside me. What are you doing, Maggie no! Then again, Maggie yes!

The hopeful smile that covers Lena's cheeks makes everything else disappear. She looks at me, as if to ask permission. When I nod eagerly in response, her face lights up again and she slides into the booth next to me.

The lights from the dance floor play across her cream colored skin, making her seem to glow and radiate beauty. A rogue curl of her long hair falls in front of her eyes and, without thinking, I gently brush it behind her ear. Her skin is warm to the touch and I can feel it rise with goosebumps in the wake of my fingertips. The shock of it is so much that I jerk my hand away.

Lena's cheeks have become slightly flushed and her hands tremble just enough for me to notice as she brings her glass to her full lips. Closing her eyes, Lena takes a long sip, nearly finishing it before putting it back on the dark wood table.

"It's good to see you Kara. Our Friday lunch plan was seeming too far away; I almost called you sooner." 

A furious blush creeps into my cheeks and I adjust my glasses out of habit. "I would have answered." Lena laughs lightly while Maggie and Alex exchange a curious glance. It is good to see Lena, not hearing from her since my trip to her apartment has been torture, but for the Supergirl side of me, I need to know what she's thinking. "So, um did you like the article?"

Lena's piercing green gaze falls into her martini. She stirs it with the end of her pinky, eventually bringing it to her deep red lips and sucking the dripping liquid. The motion makes my mouth go dry and I swallow the lump in my throat. "I'd rather not talk about it. You're part was great, you're very talented Kara, but can we not discus her tonight? She's still a rather sore subject for me."

"Oh, yeah. Okay no problem!" My voice sounds fake, even to me. Lena watches me curiously, but I shake my head and try to quite the conflicting emotions bubbling up inside me.

"Hows everybody doing tonight?" Annabelle, musician and co-owner of this wonderful little queer hide-away, takes the stage. Saved by the bell! "Thank you all for coming out, my wife Simone and I truly appreciate it. Now, before we get the DJ going, we have one more performer for you tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, the person you probably came to see, local karaoke legend, Kara Danvers!" Nevermind!

Perfect timing... I look to Alex for help but she's just smirking. Maggie is clapping wildly, along with most of the other people in the bar, and she smiles as she says, "Go get'em Little Danvers!"

With a sheepish grin and bright red cheeks, I get up from the booth and head towards the stage. Lena just stares at me with wide eyes, looking some what confused but mostly tuned on. I feel her gaze hot on my back the whole way up there and can hear her whisper to Alex, "Can she really sing?"

"You have no idea." My sister replies seriously.

The guests clap and cheer as I give Annabelle a hug. Taking the microphone, I take a deep breath and try to calm my growing nerves. Their applause only makes the butterflies in my stomach go wild! To make matters worse, all I can see in the crowd is Lena's brilliant green eyes, and they have basically the same effect on me as Kryptonite.

The music starts to play and a hush falls over the packed bar. The words appear on the screen in front of me, but I don't need them. Alex and I sang this songs, windows down and tires flying, as we drive through the city well after midnight during our college days. The memory makes a sense of calm fall over my body, and I let the words begin to fall from my lips with ease.

"Trying not to fall, on the way home

You were trying to wear me down, down

Kissing up on fences and up on walls, on the way home

I guess it's all working out now."

Lena's jaw is hanging open and a little thrill of excitement rushes through me at the sight of it. It never occurred to me how well this fits Lena and I until now. Energy builds in my chest as I continue to sing, starting to relax and dance around the stage.

"Cause it's too long to the weekend,

Too long till I drown in your hands,

Too long since I've been a fool."

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Maggie take Alex's hand. My sister only protests a little as her girlfriend leads her to the open dance floor. They wrap themselves in each other, absorbed in their gentle touches and soft whispers as they begin to dance across the floor. Following their lead, everyone gets up and joins them. 

"Leave this blue neighborhood, never knew loving could hurt this good

And it drives me wild!

Cause when you look like that, I've never ever wanted to be so bad

Oh, and it drives me wild!

You're driving me wild, wild, wild"

At this point, all of my fears and inhibitions are out the window and my body moves to my song effortlessly. The music leaves my lips, deep and powerful. As I move onto the dance floor, mic in hand, I let a little bit of Supergirl take control. 

Lena is the only one still in her seat and my eyes never leave hers. The little vein at the crook of her neck is pounding, and I watch it flutter intensely as I get closer and closer. Her pink tongue darts out to wet her dry lips and it sends a jolt of electricity straight through me.

"White noise in my mind, won't calm down,

You're all I think about."

Downing the rest of her drink, Lena slams her glass back onto the table and stands. Her raven hair cascades down her straight shoulders and her kryptonite eyes are wide with blown pupils. She looks the perfect vision of power as she begins to saunter over, hips swaying to the beat. For a brief moment, the way she's looking at me makes me forget the words.

Finally, we meet in the middle of the dance floor, the other guests making way for us. I grip the microphone tightly in one slightly shaking hand, and the other runs from Lena's flushed chest, down to the small of her back.

"You make my heart shake, bend and break

But I can't turn away and it's driving me wild!"

I can feel Lena's whole body practically pulsing as she presses herself to me. Her hands are in my hair and on my hips and just all over every inch of me, driving all of my senses wild. Fitting.

"You make my heart shake, bend and break

But I can't turn away and it's driving me wild!"

Lena spins sharply, surprising me, so that her back is pressed hotly to my front. She leans her head back to that it rest on the curve of my neck, her hair tickling my exposed skin. Her hands palm my sides and her ass wiggles against my abs in time with the melody. I can barely breathe! As I start the final chorus, Lena slides down the length of my body and back up, so that her full red lips and mere inches from mine.

"Leave this blue neighborhood, never knew loving could hurt this good

And it drives me wild!

Cause when you look like that, I've never ever wanted to be so bad

Oh, and it drives me wild!

You're driving me wild, wild, wild"

We stay like that till the song is over, gazing at each other with intense eyes. The way Lena is looking at me, with this strange mixture of arousal, confusion, and something else that I can't put my fingers on makes my head spin. I feel her breath warm on my cheek and I see nothing but the tiny space between us. 

The dimmed lights slowly turn back on as the music fades and they seem to make Lena snap back to the moment. Her fingers linger on my neck as she carefully takes a measured step back.

The whole room bursts into wild applause, and I blush fiercely, clapping back before taking a small bow. Running back to the stage, I put the microphone back on it's stage and head back to the booth. Maggie and Alex are already back there, sitting extremely close together, each with tussled hair and smeared lipstick. I grin at them before searching for Lena in the crowd. 

"You were incredible!" Lena's sultry, slightly raspy voice comes from behind me and I spin to greet her, nearly trip over myself in my own eagerness. My heart pounds so loud in my ears that it's hard to hear her at all. 

"Not too bad yourself. How'd you learn to dance like that?" I have to cross my arms to control the growing need I have to reach out and touch her.

Lena just smiles and chuckles. "I don't dance at all usually. I guess I was just feeling inspired tonight." The tension between us is thick and heavy. It sticks to my skin, making me shiver and close my eyes to collect myself. "I...I should be going. Thank you for a surprising, truly wonderful night."

"You too, Lena." I adjust my glasses for the hundredth time, and try to channel some of my Supergirl energy again. "Hey, um, about tomorrow... Maybe we could make that working lunch a dinner instead?" I bite my lip, anxiety creeping into my muscles.

"I'd really like that. Come over around 8? I'll cook, I have such a nice kitchen it's about time I get some use out of it for someone other than me."

I'm grinning from ear to ear and probably look like a complete idiot, but I don't care! "I'll be there!" 

I wrap Lena in a tight hug, my arms snaking around her neck and her hands finding the small of my back. She feels like the sun, so warm and inviting. I feel her breath hitch and hear her heart skip a full beat, it sends jolts of excitement through me.

We stay like that just a moment longer than usual, and we finally pull apart Lena looks almost sad. "Get home safe, Kara."

"You too."

She waves over her shoulder as I watch her leave, unable to move from the spot for a full minute. It's not until Alex comes over and playfully shoves me that I return to my surroundings. "Wow, what was that?" My sister says with just a hint of teasing.

"It was... something." But I have no idea what.


	7. Speeding Thoughts and Speeding Bullet

The sky is a stormy grey, filled with dark clouds that seem ready to split open and rain down their punishment upon the earth. The wind swirls violently around the crowd, blowing the other reporters' stray notebook papers onto the ground, only for them to get trampled in the rush. Everyone hurries, camera crews, reporters, protesters, all trying to get a glimpse of the infamous "fallen family".

Today, at 8:30 am, Lillian Luthor is to be arranged for her crimes against humanity. The watch on my wrist ticks loudly, the sound echoing in my ears overpowering the various other noises and thoughts that twist around my brain like a carousel. It's already 10:00 and though her trial will undoubtedly be a long, rigorous one, today's exhibit was only supposed to be a short deposition.

I'm here on behalf of CatCo, along with a handful of other reporters from the team, but as they all lean against the police barricades trying to get their stories, I stay to the outskirts. I love being a reporter, but I hate this more than anything. I can't stand to see innocent, good people like Lena get assaulted by fear and ignorance. 

The press has been ripping her apart. Ever since that night less than a month ago, Lena has been under fire from every side of the line. Protesters in favor of Lillian and her deranged vision have cropped up, calling for her immediate release from custody because apparently: Murdering aliens isn't really murder! And the authorities are monitoring Lena closely, cautious that she actually played a more sinister hand in all of this. The woman literally saves an entire species and this is what she gets for it?

Shaking my head, I try not to think about how I myself hurt her over this, and try to use my super hearing to focus on the conversations going on inside the building. It takes almost all my concentration, but I can hear Lena's signature heartbeat over the yelling and little noises. It flutters and pounds, banging around in her chest with anxiety. I wish I could comfort her...

With my x-ray vision I peek inside the court house. I see Lillian, she's staring at Lena with eyes almost exactly like the storm clouds above us, and Lena is sitting in the gallery with a stoic, unflinching expression. Her arms are folded across her chest, almost like she's holding herself close for protection, and I can practically feel the tension rolling off her stiff shoulders.

"Does the accused have anything to say before we are dismissed for today?" The judge, an older man with hair like snow and a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes, says as he gestures to Lillian.

Lena's mother stands and adjusts her formal pantsuit, struggling because her hands are still cuffed, albeit loosely. Her jaw is set in a harsh line and her disapproving gaze falls on Lena.

"I always tried to do what's best for you, Lena. Everything I did was for you and Lex, and despite what you may think, I do in fact love you. That's why I'm giving you one final chance, recant your statements, do the right thing, and stand against the alien enemy with your brother and I; join us Lena!"

I feel rage coil in my muscles and my cheeks grow hot from the force of it. Lena's heart is pounding louder than I ever heard it, and I can feel the tears building behind her eyelids. "You know mother, at least you look good in orange."

With that Lena turns her back, closing her eyes as she begins to leave the court room. Her body shudders as she sighs and I want nothing more than to wrap my arms around her and let her know that everything is going to be alright. But I can't and it kills me.

"Fine, have it your way." Lillian tips her head at the security guard and promptly returns to her seat. 

There's a click. No one else has heard it but it rings louder than thunder in my ears. The cry leaves my throat before I can stop it, "No!" In the commotion of the press no one even glances at me.

Remembering who I am, I whisper o, no, no as I move faster than the human eye can process. Suddenly I'm in the alley, in my super-suit, and then breaking through the thick stone walls of the court house. The marble columns feel like nothing more than mosquitoes as I swat them easily out of the way. No!

I hear the whoosh of air as it spins around the bullet, gaining momentum as it races towards it's unaware target. People in the room start to scream and jump to the floor as they realize what's happening. It's like I'm watching a horror movie in slow motion. Lena stops, then spins towards the sound of the noise, a typical human reaction. Her beautiful face contorts with fear and pain as she registers whats about to happen. Her hands move to shield her face but they will do nothing to protect her, only I can and I'm not sure I'm fast enough.

"Lena!" I feel everything and then nothing all at once. A future I've never dared picture before, flashes in front of my eyes and I wonder if Lena is seeing it too. Bile rises in my throat as I realize it might never happen, and I see jet black powder from the impending bullet splatter her pure white skin. "No!"

Every ounce of energy, every gram of determination, it all goes charging though my body. It electrifies me, igniting my skin so that it feels like I've been set ablaze. All I see is Lena's brilliant green eyes, and the pain in them gives me the fuel I need to lunge forward that extra millimeter.

Stretching my arm so far that the skin hurts, my fingertip comes in contact with the speeding bullet. It bounces off my impenetrable skin, grazing Lena's cheek and landing firmly in the wall behind her. Bright red blood pearls on her smooth skin and she reaches up to touch it, in complete shock. "Supergirl." she whispers in what sounds like awe.

There's no time to respond, of course Lillian had a plan B! Dozens of other clicks follow the first, but I'm closer this time, I won't let a single hair on Lena's head get hurt! I tuck the woman into my arms, wrapping the cape around us both. Bullets bounce off my skin and the resistant material, making an effective shield. I hear Lena's strangled breathing and police in the background, then silence. 

Carefully, I let Lena go and turn to survey the scene behind me. Two NCPD police officers are down, the security guards who had been hired as assassins by Lillian lay dead on the floor, people are crying and the judge is slumped over in his seat barely breathing. Three guns are aimed at Lillian with shaking hands. 

"Lillian." I say through gritted teeth. My voice sounds almost foreign to me, as it's so harsh and cold. Rage courses through my veins, making me clench my hands into fists and bright red outline the edges of my vision. I'm trembling with anger as I slowly approach her. To her credit, she only looks un-amused and disappointed. "Your daughter is going to do incredible things, things you can't even dream of! How dare you try to take her from this world before then?" My voice is dripping with venom as I practically spit at her. "You will never win! I am always going to be right there, believing in her, protecting her!"

The older Luthor quirks an eyebrow at me, not backing down. "Is that so?"

"You don't deserve a daughter like her." Lillian has nothing to say at that, and just continues to make eye contact. Rage still causes my body to shake and I have to restrain myself from attacking her. "You are going to rot in prison. I'll personally see to it that after today, you'll never see the light of day again!"

Maggie rushes into the room, coming up behind me after checking on her fallen officers. "Supergirl's right Lillian, this is the end of the line." The detective tightens the cuffs around the deranged scientist and before escorting her out to the armored car that will take Lillian away, Maggie claps me on the back. "Good job, kid."

We nod at each other and the gesture is enough to get me out of the 'red zone' as I've taken to calling it. None of that matters though, only Lena now. "Lena?" I quickly scan the still chaotic scene, finding her arguing with paramedics. The sight brings a small genuine smile to my lips. "Are you alright Miss Luthor?"

Almost nervously, I walk up to where she's getting examined, under much protest. "Supergirl, good, tell this one she needs to let us look at that wound a bit more closely? It might need stitches." The frustrated paramedic looks at me desperately and I only chuckle, shaking my head.

"You know, you really should let them look at it."

The CEO only pouts, casting her eyes anywhere but on me. "Other people are hurt worse, you should look at them first. I'll be fine." I can see the anguish and hurt swimming in her emerald eyes, and I can tell that she is so far from fine it's not even funny. "Please." Lena's voice sounds so small, almost like she's begging. "I just need to go home."

I look to the paramedic, who rolls her eyes and nods. "Fine Miss Luthor, just let me bandage it real quick."

Lena concedes, all the fight leaving her shoulders as she slumps against the ambulance and lets the paramedic do their job. Thankfully it only takes some cleaning and a bit of skin glue to patch her up, but Lena still looks way worse for wear. "Lena..." I don't know where to begin. If I was Kara I could comfort her, but as Supergirl we're still on rocky ground. I don't know where I stand with her and that's more than a little unnerving. 

"Thank you, Supergirl." Lena's spirits seem to pick up slightly as she looks me over. "You saved my life yet again." She bites the corner of her lip, what appears to be a nervous habit, and smiles at me softly. "You seem to have a knack for it."

Blush creeps into my cheeks and I run my fingers through my hair self consciously. "It was nothing."

"Well thank you, for all the nothing. You always seem to be in the right place at the right time..."

"Well this time, I think I just got lucky." Lena chuckles, still smiling and biting her lip. This is going way better than it did in my head. "Let me escort you home, it's the least I could do after this?" I gestures to the door, where just outside the press and protesters are going wild. Lena just looks at me quizzically. "We could fly out the back to avoid that whole mess." 

"I don't know... I don't like flying." 

"Do you trust me?" I hold out my hand, heart pounding in my chest as I wait for her to take it. Anxiety claws at my mind and I try desperately to shake it away. If she accepts, I know she's one step closer to forgiving me and moving on, if she refuses than I'm right back where I started.

"What?"

"Do you trust me?" This was a bad idea...

There's a glimmer of something in her eyes that I don't quite recognize. A little flash of something that I saw once before, at karaoke the other night. Its almost like a mixture of confusion and excitement, with a dash of apprehension and longing. Whatever it is, I hope she looks at me that way every day. 

"Yes." She said yes! Her voice is firm and unwavering but her hand is sweaty as she takes mine.

I literally have to stop myself from jumping up in the air like I would if I was Kara Danvers right now. It takes a lot of effort, but somehow I manage to only smile as I easily lift Lena bridal style. She wraps her arms around my neck, clinging so tightly and we aren't even off the ground yet. "I promise I won't drop you."

"I trust you." 

Grinning from ear to ear, I gently begin to hover. Slowly at first, I drift out of the building and up into the still grey sky. Lena's grip tightens as she looks at the ground now a few dozen feet below us. The wind whips her dark chocolate hair around her flushed cheeks and she squeaks as I bring us above the top of the building. "It'll be okay." I whisper softly. I mean that in a flying sense and a grand scale kind of way and I think Lena knows that.

The city is beautiful from up here. We fly over grand buildings and gorgeous parks, filled with people who look no bigger than ants at our feet. Each one is a light, one that I am responsible for protecting, but right now the light in my arms shines brighter than even the most brilliant stars. There is a chill in the air however, and fat rain drops begin to pelt down upon us. 

Picking up the pace, I fly a bit faster but not enough to truly scare Lena, and swiftly land on the balcony of her top floor apartment as gently as possible. I carefully place her on the ground, her fingers brushing the exposed skin of my neck as she lets go. The touch makes me shiver but I hope she thinks it's only from the rain.

"I got your letter, Kara gave it to me." Lena watches me carefully, the light rain soaking her dark hair. 

"Did she? And?" I rub the back of my neck, biting the corner of my lip out of anxiety.

"And, I think Kara is a lovely writer." She smiles mischievously, making me giggle.

"She is, but the sentiment was all mine."

Thunder cracks in the sky behind me and lightning illuminates the beautiful woman's sharp features. "Well thank you then, to you and Kara." Lena takes a deep breath before starting again. "I'm still looking forward to it, a Super and a Luthor working together."

"Me too." Relief floods my entire body, even as the rain soaks through my suit. Lena smiles at me, and its like the warmth of the sun is radiating from her to me.

Another crack of thunder makes Lena jump, and I can see the events of the day catching up with her. Her eyes become heavy and her muscles seem to tense. She crosses her arms over her chest, looking down at the puddle of rain accumulating at our feet. "I should let you go Miss Luthor. If you need anything, you know how to get a hold of me."

Lena offers me another small, though genuine, smile and nods. "I do, and I'll be seeing her later tonight assuming no other attempts are made against my life."

My eyes widen in surprise. I guess I assumed she would be cancelling our kind of maybe date because of everything that happened. "Are you sure you don't need to rest?"

Lena shakes her head, an amused almost whimsical expression gracing her features. "Supergirl, I'm always tired, but never of her."


	8. Cooking With Lena

Rain falls like a heavy blanket across National City. It soaks and clings to my super suit as I fly home, exhausted and spent from the morning I just had. Droplets run into my eyes, making me have to pause every now and again to use my hands like windshield wipers. The rain gives a deep chill to the air, and it settles in my bones making my whole body feel as dense as lead.

The dark grey sky surrounds me and thunder claps loudly in my ears until it's all I can hear. Still, despite this terrible weather and terrifying morning, I can't stop grinning from ear to ear.

Lena is safe! Lena is at home in her apartment, showering to wipe off the gun powder and blood, blasting music so loudly that she can't think, but still she is safe. Thankfully I was able to get there in time. I don't even want to think about what would have happened if I wasn't, what my world would be like without her in it, it's horrible.

I know a little something about your own family wanting to kill you, and I wish I could share that with Lena. Maybe I'll have a chance to tonight, in not so many words that is. I'm going to tell her who I really am, but not after everything she's been through today. Maybe I'll save that for the third date or something?

My cape slaps against my leg like a wet towel as I land easily on the ledge around my apartment. Scooting through the unlocked window, I drop to the hard wood floor along with a huge puddle of rain. It can wait, I sigh to myself as I trudge to the bathroom. Stripping out of my suit, the fabric clings to my skin but I yank it off quickly.

The water is hot on my slightly sore shoulders, providing much needed relief, but even as I shower Lena invades all of my thoughts. I see her smile at me on the roof top, how happy she got when she talked about me, it makes butterflies go wild in my stomach. Or maybe thats the hunger? I haven't eaten in like four hours!

I finish the rest of my shower hastily and head right to the kitchen after putting on my favorite fluffy pajamas. I'm working from home until my dinner plans this evening with Lena, so no point in getting dressed now when I'll only ruin it. Plus the fuzzy softness is good for my soul after a morning like this.

After digging through the leftovers, I plop down on the couch with my laptop. Opening up to the Catco homepage, my stomach turns at the headline of every major article: Lena, The last Good Luthor.

It hits me full force, like a giant warrior alien sub race with a vendetta against Kryptonians. My head spins as I read the headline again, and I feel like I've just been sucker punched right in the gut. The last good Luthor...

Lena and I are both the last of our kind.

I watch the rain droplets as they race each other down the glass of my windows. I see the flash of lightning illuminate tall, apartment buildings against the stormy sky. My pulse pounds in time with the thunder and I feel tears sting at the corners of my now painfully open eyes. Lena Luthor and I are the last of our kind... She must be so lonely...

Soft buzzing at my hip distracts me from my overwhelming thoughts and Alex's name flashes across the screen. "Hey." I say in a forced cheerful tone as I quickly wipe the tears away and answer my sister.

"Hey. I just thought you should know, Lillian has been transported to Belleview without incident. They locked her up in max, no one goes in or out without our approval and two DEO agents are going to be stationed there full time."

"Good." I breathe with a sigh of relief. "At least this is some justice."

"The judge will be okay too. They did have to rule a mistrial, but Lillian pretty much ruined any chances she had at an appeal. She is never going to see the light of day again."

A part of me is thrilled, a large part, and I'm almost ashamed of that. I shouldn't be wishing ill on someone, yet here I am hoping she rots in prison and then hell. I'm glad she's in jail, now she can never hurt aliens or her daughter ever again! "Thank you, Alex."

"Do you want to talk about it?" She always could read me like an open book.

Sighing heavily, I glance back at the article on my computer screen and get choked up all over again. "Do you think I should tell Lena I'm Supergirl?"

I hear a muffled choke on the other end of the line and can tell Alex definitely was not expecting that. "Hell no! No, it's too risky! You don't even know her that well. It's not like you're seriously dating yet-" Alex stops herself and takes a deep breath. "Kara, if you need to, then tell her, but I think you should wait at least until all of this blows over. She's still kind of upset at you from the last time you lied to her, right? She may take this the same way. Just be careful, okay? I love you though, no matter what."

She makes a good point, even though I don't want to hear it. "I haven't decided what to do yet, but I'll think about it. Oh, and what should I wear tonight?" Thinking about my night ahead with Lena makes my heart race and my normally cheerful demeanor return. "Casual right, since it's at her house, but still sexy?"

"Oh my god Kara, you know I'm literally the worst at this right?"

"I know, but you always help me with pre-date stuff!" I can practically see her shaking her head at me. "I'm pouting right now! You can't see it, but I'm pouting."

"Alright, alright! Hmmm, I'd go with your super tight blue jeans, the ones with the rips at the knees, and maybe your off the shoulder sweater thing? I like the purple one you have and I think that's Lena's favorite color besides black." Alex chuckles and I hear the smile in her voice. "Call me after, okay? I'm sure you'll have a great night no matter what you wear."

"You really are my favorite sister."

"I'm your only sister dummy."

"Well, I do have Maggie now so..." I reply playfully, making Alex snort with laughter.

"Oh my god, Kara no! Goodbye, I'll talk to you later."

"Bye favorite sis!"

Still giggling, I lay back on the couch feeling lighter than before. Alex is right, I am going to have a good night, whether I tell her the truth about me or not. The sound of the rain pitter-pattering against the apartment slowly lulls me to sleep, and as I drift off it's Lena I see in my dreams.

I wake to the blaring noise of my alarm in a foggy haze. Tendrils of sleep cling to me as I sit up on the couch and I have to fight them off to rub my heavy eyelids. How long was I out? The way my body creaks as I stand makes it feel like a thousand years. What time is it?

I grab my phone to silence the annoying alarm and gasp at the time on the screen, 7:30! Shit, I told Lena I'd be there by 8! Okay Kara, calm down, you have superpowers remember? Half an hour is more than enough time to get ready, or normally it would be if I wasn't so damn nervous!

It takes me ten minutes alone to decide on which shade of lipstick to wear and by the time I'm actually dressed it's 7:55. "Leaving my house now."

I send the quick text to Lena to let her know I'm running a bit late and to my surprise her response is almost instantaneous. "Great, hope you like seafood!"

"Are you kidding me, of course I do! I see-food and I eat it."

"Omg just come over you giant nerd."

For some reason, being called a giant nerd by Lena Luthor fills my heart with so much joy I could practically explode. My cheeks burn from my now bright red blush and my fingers instinctively close tighter around the phone, until I notice the case starting to give way and quickly put it back in my pocket. "Crap." I mumble to myself, shaking my head but still smiling from ear to ear. 

The rain has finally subsided and a clear expanse of evening sky stretches before me. The setting sun is beautiful as I fly swiftly, landing in the alley just behind Lena's building to change out of my Supergirl suit. Tucking it safely into my bag, I start up the many flights of stairs to her door, that way she won't think I got here in an unnaturally fast amount of time.

Once I'm finally in front of her solid, slightly intimidating door, I take a deep breath and knock. My head swims with nervous energy, making me bounce on the tips of my toes, but as soon as Lena opens the door and I see her standing there, looking at me like that, everything melts away. Waves of pure excitement and happiness wash over me. I know for sure now, after almost losing her today, this is where I want to be.

"You are so beautiful." The words come spilling out of my mouth before I can stop them, they just fall so naturally from my tongue when talking about Lena. She really is beyond beautiful. She's changed out of her formal business wear and into a more comfortable pair of grey jeans that hug her every curve. She's wearing a simple navy v-neck, but it's covered mostly by the most well loved apron I have ever seen.

That apron must be older than she is! You can tell that at one point it must have been white, but now it's splattered with all manner of colors and washed so many times that the edges are grey. Flour is speckled across her defined cheeks, that are now bright red from blushing.

Out of all the Lena's I've seen, the confident, take-no-shit CEO, the brave face for the press, the seductress on the dance floor, I think this Lena is the most real she's ever been and I am swooning. She is just so, so beautiful...

"Thank you, you look lovely yourself. I'd hug you, but as you can see, I'm covered in flour." Lena bites the corner of her lip, green eyes sparkling. "Come on in."

Following Lena, we go straight to the bustling kitchen. Multiple pans, all filled with delicious smelling food, cover the gas stove top and I can see something baking in the oven. It's a struggle not to use my x-ray vision to peek. "Wow, to be honest, when you said you were going to cook I kind of pictured take out. My version of cooking is taking something out of a box and putting it on a plate, but this is incredible!"

Lena blushes again, smiling as she stirs the pot. "Thank you. I'm sorry it's not ready yet, but I had a slight mishap with the first batch of bread."

"You made your own bread?" I ask excitedly with wide eyes. Drool must be coming out of the corner of my mouth by now, because holy shit this is just like my dream.

Giggling, Lena shakes her head yes and checks on it in the oven. "Two more minutes. I never have anyone to cook for so I may have gone a little over board."

"Lena, if you cook like this all the time I swear I will be here every night."

"You got yourself a deal."

We both blush now, smiling shyly as we realize the implications. I set my bag down on the counter and come over to stand next to her by the stove. She focuses on stirring the wonderfully smelling food, but I focus on her. The gash on her cheek, from where the bullet grazed her this morning, is covered by a small bandage. Her dark chocolate hair is swept across her cheek in an attempt to hide it.

Gently, I brush her hair behind her ear, exposing the wound fully. I carefully brush my fingertips over it and feel the way Lena shivers under my touch. She flinches ever so slightly, making me drop my hand. "Lena, I'm so sorry." I say softly.

Closing her eyes, Lena shakes her head firmly. "Don't be. Supergirl was there. And now my mom is going where she belongs and at least I'm alive."

Guilt pangs at my heart again. Lillian may be delusional and dangerous, but she is still Lena's mom... "I meant about your mom."

Lena puts the spoon down and turns to me. I watch carefully as she bites the corner of her lip. When she meets my gaze her eyes are watery and I fear I've done something wrong. I'm about to apologize when she whispers, "Thank you. No one's said that to me yet." Following what feels right, I squeeze Lena's hand tightly until the Luthor squeezes back. Understanding seems to flow between us and we smile widely at each other. All too quickly Lena pulls her hand and wipes her eyes. "No sad thoughts in my kitchen."

I chuckle at her as she turns her attention back to the food. "What are we making?"

"We?" Lena says with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." I reply enthusiastically.

"We are making lobster Newburg, still want to help?"

"Definitely! Teach me." 

Lena seems to take my challenge and run with. "Okay." I'm almost scared by the predatory look in her eyes.

She hands me the spoon, coming up behind me so that both her arms snake around my waist. Lena holds my hand in hers, guiding me to stir the simmer sauce correctly. I gasp as her body comes in full contact with my back, making me shiver and instinctively lean back greedy for more of her touch. Her breath is warm on my neck as she tells me what to do, but I can't focus on anything other than the feel of her.

"Like, like this?" I manage to stutter as I fold in the ingredients at her instruction.

"Mhm." It feels so intimate, Lena's body flush against mine and me practically quiver because of it. Her voice is smooth and sultry in my ear and her hands are soft as they roam from my wrists, up my arms and then down my sides. "Very good."

Lena's full lips brush against the curve of my neck so gently that I think I must be imagining it, that is until I feel them sucking more firmly at the sensitive skin there. I can't help it, my back arches and a moan escapes my parted lips as a jolt gets sent straight from her lips to the ends of my toes. "Ohhh."

Lena hums in approval, continuing her ministrations down the entire expanse of my neck. I can't take it anymore! My head feels so dizzy as I spin around to face her it's like I'm drunk. Her kyrptonite colored eyes stare back at me, wide with anxiety but darkened from lust. I can feel her pulse in her hands, beating so erratically that it makes my own heart pound that much faster. "Lena..."

DING! The sudden noise startles me so much that I nearly jump 6 feet in the air. Lena bites her lip and laughs at me while I clutch my heart and try to catch my breath.

"Dinner is ready." 

"Yeah," I'm still flushed from our previous intimacy and trying to collect myself. "Yeah, dinner is ready."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me for leaving it here! The next chapter will be up soon, and remember, this is a bit of a slow burn so prepare yourself for angst because they can't get together just like that. Huge thank you to everyone who has been commenting, you guys have no idea how much it means to me. For real, thank you.


	9. Beautifully Lost

Soft yellow light from the two candles at the center of the dining room table dance across Lena's sharp features, making her appear even more breath taking in their ethereal glow. The light plays against the mischievous glimmer in her electric green eyes, the one that hasn't gone away since our moment in the kitchen earlier. Just thinking of it brings a blush to my cheeks. How she wrapped her arms around me, how soft her lips were on my skin...

"What? Where'd you just go?" Lena asks me with a hint of teasing in her voice. I only blush more, using my napkin to try and hide it. Our knees bump together under the table and Lena leaves hers pressed to mine.

"Nowhere." Lena sips her red wine, watching me over the rim of her glass. Her own cheeks are flushed and I have no idea if its from the drink or me. "I'm still right here, enjoying great food with even better company."

She quirks her left eyebrow, biting the corner of her lip in the way she does that makes my knees go weak. "You really think my food is good?"

Holding up my empty plate for emphasis, I reply with very real enthusiasm. "Are you kidding me? I had to fight myself not to lick this plate clean in front of you. It was like, really hard for me."

Lena laughs, ducking her head to hide her reddening cheeks. "I wouldn't mind if you did." She runs her fingers through her long hair and I can't pull my eyes away long enough to think about taking her up on the offer. "It's nice to have someone to cook for."

"How did you learn to cook like this?" The dinner really was exceptional. Every subtle flavor exploded on my tongue, making ungodly, fairly embarrassing noises leave my lips. But it was just too good for me to care.

"Well..." Lena rests her elbows on the table, kneading her hands together as her brows furrow together. "My parents couldn't really be bothered to raise me, even when I first got adopted. We had a rotating door of nannies and staff around the house, but my favorite was this exchange student from France. She was so warm and loving, just everything I was craving at the time."

The way her voice wobbles makes me think those are still the things she longs for and it makes my heart ache. Those are things I am ready to give! As long as she'll take them and I can find a way to get past my reservations... 

"She would make this incredible, beautiful, delicious food. It was the kind of cooking that just warms you from the inside, you know? I remember watching her in the kitchen one day, I was probably about 7 or 8 at the time, and from then on I was hooked. Every night I would sneak away from whatever boring lesson my parents had planned for me and help her cook."

The wistful expression on Lena's features makes me smile along with her at the happy memory, that is until she glances down into her wine and her expression turns dark. "She got fired once my mother found out my father was fucking her." My eyes widen in surprise and Lena takes a long sip of her drink. "But I kept cooking, no matter what was going on. It became a healthy coping mechanism for me through my angsty teenage years." Shaking her head, Lena chuckles to get out of whatever head space she just dipped into and smiles up at me. "What about you Kara, how do you get through the rough times?"

"Punching things." I reply without a second thought and my hands shoot up to cover my mouth as I realize what I've said. Rao, why do I always do this? Lena just laughs. The way her head tips back and the edges of her mouth open up to a smile make my heart flutter. "I mean, um, I'm really into Krav Maga, and I train a lot with my sister."

"Ah, that makes more sense. My mind automatically went to sweet Kara Danvers punching a poor, defenseless pillow." I immediately flash back to that time I was 16 and reeling from this stupid bully on the school bus; I punched my pillow so hard that it exploded and feathers rained down around the room. "Your sister is FBI right? You guys seem close."

"We are." I reply with a nod and easy smile, choosing to ignore the FBI part because the thought of lying to Lena makes my stomach churn. "Very. We didn't get along at first, like at all, but now we're inseparable. I can't imagine my life without her."

"I hope you never have to." Lena is looking down at her napkin, tracing the pattern with the edge of her fork. Biting my lip, I tentatively reach over and take the fork from her hand. Her skin is warm on mine and it sends tingles up to my elbow. Our fingers lace together and the air that had become heavy between us now seems to lighten.

"You can tell me about him if you'd like."

After a long breath, Lena shakes her head. "There's not much left to say. I've already told you more about him than almost anyone else, and I'm much more interested in you, Kara Danvers."

"Oh I'm not interesting." I feel the flush rising from my neck and I adjust my glasses out of habit. "Totally ordinary actually."

"Well I respectfully disagree! I don't think you realize it Kara, but I am not exactly an approachable person. Most people are either intimidated by me or disgusted or a bit of both, but you, you are the only person who seems to be able to actually see me." I had forgotten we were even holding hands until Lena grips mine tighter. I respond eagerly, rubbing my thumb against the curve of her wrist. The action makes Lena inhale sharply, watching my with dilated pupils. "I'm really glad I met you."

"Me too." I reply sincerely, happiness rolling off of me in waves. 

Lena looks so beautiful. Her green eyes are shining as they dart from my eyes to my lips an back again. She's still wearing that well-loved apron and her fingers are twitching nervously. The light from the candles flickers across her stunning features as she darts her tongue out to wet her bright red lips. I can't take my eyes away. 

"Plus you can sing." I giggle and lean close, so close that strands of my wavy blonde hair intertwine with her chocolate brown. I hear her signature heart beat begin to pound so loudly that it fills all of my senses. I can actually feel it, vibrating in my bones and pulsing across my skin. It feels like nothing less than magic.

"Lena..." My voice is nothing more than a whisper as it falls softly from my lips onto the skin of the beautiful woman before me. Her whole body shivers and her brilliant green eyes fall to mine.

"Kara." She says my name like it's something holy, something to be worshiped and cherished, and I only feel the smallest pang of guilt when her fingers come up to tangle in my hair. 

I get caught up in the noise of her heart beat and the scent of her lavender perfume, the feel of her nails digging ever so slightly into my scalp and the sight of her full lips mere inches from mine. "Kara." My own heart is racing now as she closes the gap between us, and my head begins to swim with the myriad of emotions running through me. 

Finally, her lips find mine and I become beautifully lost. Every cell in my body feels like it's exploding! It's like I've been ignited from the inside out, set ablaze by the firm movement of her soft lips on mine. Coming to my senses, I kiss Lena back passionately. I melt into her touch, a soft moan escaping my lips.

All too soon, Lena pulls back, chest heaving and eyes still closed. She presses her forehead to mine, biting her lip so hard that it starts to bleed. My heart immediately aches at the abrupt loss. "Lena." I cup her cheeks in my hands and can feel her trembling under my touch. "Are you okay?" I watch her face closely, eyes wide with concern. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Lena adamantly shakes her head and pulls back so her eyes can meet mine. "God no." I can see longing and fire and a hint of something that makes my chest burn reflected in her glossy eyes. "I just can't believe I get to feel like this."

"Oh Lena." I kiss her deeply, my arms encircling her waist, and it's not long before she's kissing me back with abandon. Her fingers pull at my hair and her lips move greedily against mine. I quiver under her touch as she becomes more forward, fingertips blazing a path like lava down my neck, stopping at the curve of my collar bone.

Lena eventually pulls back, gasping for air, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "See, I told you, you're interesting Kara Danvers."

We both laugh, blush rising in our cheeks, and smile at each other almost shyly. Just as I'm about to ask her to kiss me again, my phone buzzes with the ringtone I have for only Alex. "I am so sorry, I have to answer this." Lena rests back in her seat and sips her wine, looking surprisingly unperturbed. "Hello?"

"Kara, I'm sorry, I know this is an important night, but we need you downtown NOW! J'onn should have been able to handle it on his own but there are more of them than we thought. We need you Supergirl."

I swallow the lump in my throat, glancing at Lena who is now watching me with furrowed brows. "Okay. I'll be right there." Putting my phone back in my bag, I take a deep breath. "Lena, I am so, so sorry. I really don't want to do this but I have to go." Swirling her wine, Lena regards me carefully. "It's an emergency with my sister, and I wouldn't go unless I absolutely had to."

She sees the panic in me and softens. "Is your sister okay?"

"I don't know." I reply as honestly as I can. "But it is an emergency." 

Lena stands and I see the tension in her shoulders. She's obviously disappointed but incredibly understanding. I follow her towards the door, but just as she opens it I put a hand on her wrist.

"Thank you for dinner." I cup the steep curve of her jaw, leaning in to kiss her one more time before the night is unfortunately over. 

When I pull away, Lena is smiling and she chuckles at me. "You're welcome. I had a great time."

"Can we do this again?" I say with hopeful eyes, making Lena beam back at me.

"Please." I can't help myself, her lips are just too tantalizing! Bouncing on my toes, I kiss her quickly. It's just a peck but it's enough to make my head swim. I remind myself of J'onn and the people waiting on me and force myself to leave. It's okay though, I know I'll be back soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Years!!! Thank you for all of the love you guys are showing me in the comments, it really makes my bad days much much brighter!


	10. Let Me Walk You Home

CatCo is an extremely large company. The main building alone is twenty stories high and reaches well into the clear blue sky of National City. It's filled with reporters, researchers, programmers, designers, and countless other employees, all working hard to the common goal. Normally I love the busy buzz of the office, but today every click of the stapler and ring of the phone pounds in my head. Even the doorbell way down on the first floor is making the throbbing worse.

Rubbing my temples, I rest my head in my hands and try to calm my breathing. It took me years of being on earth to learn to control my super powered senses, but sometimes it still becomes overwhelming, usually after an extremely long day.

Today is one of those days. There was another alien attack downtown that made me late for work, Snapper chewed me out for it and then scrapped my article, assigning me to another puff piece instead. Normally all of that would be okay, just a day in the life right, but this morning the alien's were attacking L Corp.

It can't be random, it's too much of a coincidence. They targeted the headquarters on purpose to try to hurt the Luthor's, but all they managed to do was cause a giant headache for Lena and Supergirl.

In the wake of the attack I released a statement commending Lena and trying to quell the fears of both the alien and human populations of National City. Though I don't think I made much headway on either front. Some aliens are blinded by their fear and anger at the Luthors and a lot of humans fell into the anti-alien rhetoric of Cadmus because it's always easier to blame someone else for your problems.

Sighing heavily, I close my eyes and try to block out my racing thoughts and the incredibly annoying sound of someone snapping their gum three floors below me. Thankfully it's almost time to go home. Alex and Maggie are supposed to come over tonight for movies and snacks, and that never fails to relax me.

Suddenly one noise rings louder than the others. Heels click against the tile so loud that the sound bounces around my skull. I almost cover my ears to make it stop, but then in the background my super-hearing detects something else, something familiar. I focus on that noise like a beacon, letting it consume me until I can finally place exactly what it is... Lena!

Her heels continue to clack as she exits the elevator on my floor but that, along with everything else, fades to the background when I see her. Her brilliant green eyes scan the crowd until they settle on me, lighting up when our eyes meet. She smiles and the warmth radiating from her has the same effect on me as the yellow sun.

"Lena, hi! Another surprise visit to CatCo?"

"Another surprise visit for you." She chuckles and leans against the edge of my desk. Her already short skirt hikes up to reveal more of her smooth, tantalizing skin. She must catch me staring because shes biting her lip seductively and gives me a wink. My cheeks burn from blushing and I quickly adjust my glasses. "Happy to see me?"

"Very." I reply with a squeak, making Lena laugh. The airy sound brings a wide smile to my lips and suddenly my day isn't so bad anymore.

"So how has your day been? I haven't heard from you much."

Since our date only a couple of nights ago, Lena and I have been texting frequently. Sometimes serious, sometimes flirty, but mostly just cute little emoji's and sarcastic comments. With everything going on I've hardly had a chance to even look at my phone. "Busy." I say with a sigh.

"I figured. Mine too. So I was thinking... maybe we could go out tonight? Forget the attack this morning, work, responsibilities, and just have a good time."

"I'd love to!" I say eagerly, sitting up straight and clapping my hands together. My shoulders fall when I remember what I had already planned. "But..." I see Lena's face start to fall too, but then a plan starts to form and I smile mischievously. "But I promised Alex and Maggie we would have a movie night. You should come!"

Lena bites her lip and fiddles with the silver watch on her wrist. "I don't know... Would they even want me there?"

"Of course! Come on, it'll be fun! The Danvers go really hard for movie marathons, like Olympic level. Pizza, potstickers, ice cream, dramatic scene reenactments, sing a-longs, we got it all." A small smile starts to play at the corner of her red lips and I know it's time for the finishing moves. "Pleaseeee." I break out the pout and puppy dog eye combo and Lena doesn't even stand a chance.

"Alright, but you owe me."

"Anything!" I jump up from my desk, headache long since forgotten, and bounce on the tips of my toes. "Yay, this is going to be so much fun!" Lena only smiles and shakes her head. I glance at the clock and squeal again when I see the glowing digital numbers read 6:00. Linking arms with Lena, I beam at her and guide us both to the elevator.

Once we step outside, a strong gust of winter wind tussles the dark locks of Lena's hair around her flushed cheeks. The setting sun paints a beautiful picture of deep blues and vibrant purples as it hangs in the wonderful balance just before it sets completely. Pausing for a moment, I take in the beautiful sights of the city before my eyes fall to the stunning woman beside me.

She's looking around too, a sense of wonder on her face. Colorful lights decorate the streets, coating the slightly snowy streets with red and green. "You live close right? Would it be okay if we walked?"

I kiss her slightly chilly cheek, briefly nuzzling my forehead against her. It's an intimate gesture that makes my heart flutter and skip a beat. Hand in hand we walk down the streets, now illuminated only by the dim street lamps and festive holiday decorations as the sun sets completely. "Do you celebrate Christmas?" I ask on impulse, inspired by the decorations.

"No. Well, not exactly. We did when I was little, but it always felt hollow. Most of the time my parents didn't even stay to watch Lex and I open the presents they had gotten to try and buy our love. But breakfast that morning was always special. I cooked for Lex and I and we exchanged our own presents, ones the we made for each other."

I watch the way Lena's brows crinkle and how she quickly lifts her free hand to wipe at the tears stinging the edges of her piercing green eyes. I squeeze Lena's hand to offer reassurance and she responds by letting go and wrapping her arm around my waist. She hugs her body close to mine, hips bumping as we continue, and I love this physical closeness.

"For my first Christmas as a Luthor, Lex made me this little doll. It had crazy bright red hair and a pink dress that he stole from the curtains in the living room. Mother was furious." Lena chuckles at the memory, lightly resting her head on my shoulder. "I loved that doll until she fell apart, literally." Lena smiles at me, brushing my blonde hair behind my ear and adjusting my glasses for me. "What were holidays like in your childhood?"

For a moment I think she's asking about Holidays on Krypton and get slightly disappointed when I realize she's not. "Big." I finally settle on with a chuckle. "Eliza is jewish and Jeremiah celebrated Christmas, so it was always a big event. It could get kind of overwhelming, but I grew to love the family parties. Alex and I watched Christmas specials until we fell asleep waiting for Santa and we always baked special cookies." Just thinking about those precious moments with my family warms me from the inside.

"How do you celebrate now?" 

"Christmas eve is normally at my appartment. Eliza cooks, Alex gets drunk, and my friends and I play games until it's time to exchange presents secret santa style." Delicate snow flakes begin to fall, landing softly on Lena's dark hair and eyelashes. She looks like a creature of magic. "If, if you don't have any plans, would you maybe like to come spend-"

I'm cut off by the sound of shuffling. I don't think Lena's heard it because she looks at me with wide, expectant eyes, but my super-hearing zeros in on the sound. There, in the shadows of the alley! I barely register the whoosh of air before my body reacts. "Get down!" I shove Lena out of the way just as a knife zooms past where her head was only milliseconds ago.

She screams in surprise, hitting the wall opposite us harder than I intended. Bringing her hands up to shield her face, and the still healing injury from her mother's trial, Lena looks at me in panic. "What the hell was that?!"

"Get down!" I yell again as another knife is thrown and I practically tackle her to the ground. My breath comes in fast, uncontrollable gasps as I search for the new location of the attacker. I'm able to hear his heart beat and it's surprisingly steady. This guy is no ameuture, he's killed before.

Jumping out from his hiding place, a man dressed all in black stalks towards us. Only his eyes are visible and the stare at me with a cold, unforgiving gaze. Lena is still on the ground and I stand over her protectively; I won't let anything happen to her!

"Kara..." Lena whispers, voice trembling with fear.

"It'll be okay." I say confidently. And it will be. I turn my attention back to the advancing assassin. "You just messed with the wrong girls."

He charges with incredibly agile foot work, curved knives in each hand. He moves so fast there is no way he's human! But to his knowledge, I am just some blonde, defenseless girl, not the most powerful Superhero in this city. The trick won't be beating him, it'll be not giving away my identity, otherwise whoever sent him will know my secret, not to mention Lena.

The assassin strikes with deadly precision, jabbing for my chest only to have me jump back just in time. My forearm connects with his, knocking one knife to the ground. he growls in frustration but I only smirk. "I hate to say I told you so, but..." 

With renewed anger, he attacks again, even faster this time. I manage to block every advance, but stumble back as he presses the hand to hand combat. Shit! I feel my body being shoved with super human force, launching backwards to the ground. I hear Lena scream my name in sheer terror, but this fight is far from over! Managing to spin, I land on my back and jump up to my feet instantaneously, fists at the ready. 

Slashes are already being made in my direction, one cutting the sleeve of my shirt. Like a tiger in a cage, I pace around the aggressor, deflecting his attacks and waiting for the perfect moment to strike. There! I drop to a crouch and sweep his legs out from under him, his own momentum bringing him crashing to his knees. Before he can register what's happening my fist smashes into his nose, making bright red blood splatter the once clean, white snow.

Still he lunges for me, but I'm faster. A high kick to the jaw makes him trip, and I wrap that same leg around his neck, bringing him down to the floor in a thigh choke. Of course the move makes my own body slam into the harsh pavement, but it feels like nothing more than a bee-sting. 

"Stay down." I growl at the killer, who is only barely moving now, but he keeps going. I have no choice, I choke him out until he passes out, limp body unconscious in the snow.

I don't even pay him a second glance as I get to my feet and hurry to Lena's side. Her eyes are wide in shock and her heart is beating faster than a humming birds. She clutches at my arms, looking over every inch of me with desperation. "Did he hurt you? Are you okay?" 

"I'm fine." Gently I take her hands and bring them to my lips so I can kiss her knuckles. "I'm fine. Are you okay?"

She looks herself over, like she hadn't even considered that a possibility until now, and nods her head yes. "I...I think so. Who is he?"

"I think he's an assassin. Someone is trying to kill you again."

"My mother." Lena spits out bitterly, clenching her hands into fists.

Her frantic breath forms little white clouds in the air between us and I stroke her cheek to calm her down. "It's going to be okay. I'm going to call my sister and she can help with this, okay?"

Lena clutches me the whole time I'm on the phone with Alex. Luckily she and Maggie were already at my apartment and will be here soon, but I'm less worried about the unconscious man in the snow and more worried about the shaking woman in my arms. 

"How did you do that?" Lena whispers with amazement and a hint of suspicion. 

I swallow hard. "Krav Maga."

Her emerald eyes search mine, making me weaker than kyrptonite. I can't tell her now, this isn't the right time or place, but my heart screams to! "Well Kara, you are going to have to teach me." Something in her expression changes. The fear leaves her eyes and is replaced with this intense glimmer of desire. She bites the corner of her lip, bringing her hands to rest behind my neck. "Because that was very impressive." Lena enunciates the word very, letting it fall from her tongue dripping with longing. 

Adrenaline still courses through my body and warmth flows to my stomach like lava. My hands find themselves at her hips, pushing Lena so that her back hits the wall of the alley and makes her gasp with both surprise and enjoyment. My lips are on hers now, needy and demanding as she opens her mouth to me. 

I know this is dangerous. I feel like Supergirl now; I AM Supergirl now. Yet I can't bring myself to stop. I kiss her and I kiss her until her nails dig sharply into my back and her whole body is flushed between mine and the wall. My hand grips the curve of her knee, holding her leg up against my waist, skin slick under my touch. She breathes heavily onto my skin, body trembling as she tries to catch her breath. I've never been in control like this before and it is exhilarating! Lena melts into me, kissing me passionately, almost desperately, and my head spins from the taste of her.

Snow continues to fall around us but we are keeping each other warm. It's not until Lena bites my lip sharply that I lean back and take in the moment. Her chest is heaving and a deep red blush travels the expanse of her exposed skin. She's so, so breathtakingly beautiful! Lena watches me with wonder, smiling slyly. "What?"

"Would you, um, would you maybe want to come spend Christmas with me?" 

Lena tilts her head back in surprise, looking slightly suspicious again but also kinda thrilled. "Really?"

I nod happily and return us to a less suggestive position, though still very close. I wrap my arms around her waist and smile from ear to ear. "Yes. I really like you Lena and I want you there."

"In that case, I wouldn't miss it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lena @ multiple points throughout this chapter: mark me down as scared AND horny!  
> I hope you guys liked it! I'm thinking maybe 4 more chapters.


	11. Front Page News

Warm sunlight falls across my suntanned skin, casting a harsh glare over my still closed eyes. Pulling the snug, fuzzy blankets up over my face, I burrow deeper into the warm safety of my bed. I want nothing more than to stay here all day, wrapped up in a cocoon and dreaming about a certain brunette someone with eyes like the most stunning forests.

Unfortunately, my hair tickles my cheeks and sticks to my neck uncomfortably as I roll around trying to get comfortable, and my stomach is growling so loud it's like a lion! With a heavy groan, I force myself to push the covers back and sit up. After a big yawn and a good stretch I swing my legs over the side of the bed and slip on my fuzzy slippers.

First things first, coffee! I shuffle to the kitchen, eyes still slightly fuzzy from sleep, and get out my favorite mug. It has a picture of me and Alex on it from when we went to Disney world; I'm smiling from ear to ear but Alex is pouting that way she does when she's secretly enjoying something but doesn't want you to know it.

It makes me smile as I sip the fresh coffee, leaning against the window sill as I look out onto the city. The sun is bright but still low in the morning sky. It makes the snow seem to glisten and glow on the pavement where it hasn't yet been cleared and I momentarily get lost in the idea of making snow angels.

Then I remember last night, when the beautiful white snow was splattered with bright red blood, and shudder. I clutch my coffee closer, like its warmth can fight off my anxiety but its no use. I would feel better if we had learned anything, but even with J'onn's intimidating interrogation tactics the assassin isn't talking.

In the twelve hours since the attack, all he's said is "Cadmus forever." Alex looked into it and is positive that there is no way Lillian could have ordered this specific hit from prison. I guess I was naive to think that with her arrest Cadmus would fall, though I am surprised they managed to regroup so quickly. I should have known that behind every monster there is another ready to take its place.

My main focus now has to be on protecting Lena. She's taken it upon herself to double her security, but Cadmus is diabolical. Biting my lip, I stare down into the swirling caramel of my coffee and sigh. It'll be okay, we have each other...

At first Lena was pretty shaken up after the attack, the second on her life in only a week, but by the time I got her home she seemed complacent more than anything. She kissed me at the door, trembling hands gripping my collar. My lips are still tingling from it. But there was something heavy about the kiss and it left an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I should text her... Putting my mug in the sink, I check the time on the microwave clock: 7:30. I'm a morning person and Lena is more of a night owl, but on a weekday she should be in the office by now. I skip back to my room and flop down onto the pillows. It's tempting to close my eyes and let sleep find me again underneath this insanely warm comforter, I don't have to be at work till 9 anyways, but I reach for my phone first.

I unplug it and wait while the screen turns on to reveal my lock-screen photo of me, Alex, and Winn posing for a picture with fake light-sabers. What can I say, Winn got me into it! I type in the password and am shocked at the sheer number of notifications!

3 missed calls from Alex, 2 from Maggie, 2 from J'onn, 1 from Winn, and holy shit 5 from Snapper! I open my insane amount of texts first. "That photo is doctored right? There's no way its real! Don't worry Kara, we'll find out who did this!" ~ James. "Call me as soon as you get this!" "Seriously Kara, this is not funny. CALL ME!" ~ Alex. "Please call your sister, she's freaking out. I hope you're okay Little Danvers." ~ Maggie.

But the one that is the most alarming by far is from Lena. It's a short text, simple really, but it makes my heart race and my blood run cold. "I am so sorry. Call me when you can."

What the hell is going on? I should probably call Alex first so she doesn't have a heart attack and can tell what this is all about. I rack my brain as I dial her and have no clue what I did that could have caused this type of reaction.

Alex picks up on the first ring. "Kara, what the hell where you thinking?!"

"Woah, Alex what are you talking about?" I'm genuinely perplexed and my sisters harsh tone stings a bit.

"Jesus Kara where have you been? Have you turned on your TV this morning, checked the paper?"

"No..."

I hear Alex sigh heavily and grind her teeth together in frustration. "Just do it." Her voice is full of anxiety and exasperation and my heart races again as I quickly turn the channel to the National City News Network. 

At first its just the weather and I get even more confused. "3 more inches of snow?"

"Just wait for it."

Biting my lip, I stare at the screen in anticipation. Once Jessica is done with the weather, it goes back to Bill and Hannah at the central studio. "And now we're back with breaking news! Last night, while most of the city slept, a masked man attacked Lena Luthor as she left CatCo magazine. The attack, which falls immediately in the wake of an even larger attack on her company and the arrest of her mother, was apparently foiled by cub reporter Kara Danvers. It's been noted that the two have been spending a lot of time together lately, and after this photo was released this morning there is little room for interpretation."

I don't breathe as a black and white photo appears on the screen. It's a rather artful take to be honest, my long hair is flowing in the breeze and the falling snow looks lovely against the brick wall. Under any other circumstance I would have liked to have this photo in my wallet, but seeing it on public television makes me sick to my stomach.

The assassin is lying unconscious in the snow a few feet from us, but I doubt that is what most of the public is looking at... The powerful, notorious Lena Luthor is pinned against the wall, with her leg hooked around my hip, her fingers fisted in my hair, and her head tilted back as I kiss her neck with her eyes closed in pleasure. You can see my signature square rimmed glasses and the chiseled muscles of my arms, drawing the viewers eyes to how tightly I'm gripping Lena.

Oh fuck...

The photo is positively scandalous, leaving absolutely no question as to the nature of our relationship. I stare in stunned silence at the scene. Equally pissed and impressed at the person who managed to get this photo. I must have been so caught up in the moment with Lena that I didn't hear them!

"So you see why I'm freaking out! How did you let this happen?"

"I...I don't know." I stutter out. I know Alex's anger is only coming from a place of fear but it hurts non the less. "I was careless."

"You think! The whole point of the ponytail and the glasses and the day job is that you stay out of the spotlight. Now you, Kara Danvers you not Supergirl, is on the front page of every story from here to Metropolis! What if people start connecting the dots, Kara?"

"The point of all that isn't to hide my identity." I say defensively. "It's so I can live the life I want to live! I need my job, my friends, my time away from fighting crime to feel normal. I deserve to have a full life, with love and happiness and some form of normalcy! And Lena makes me feel like I'm flying with my feet on the ground, like the two conflicting halves of me are a solid whole... I didn't mean for this to happen, but it did and we can handle the consequences."

After a long, heavy pause, Alex sighs lightly. "I know. I know Kara, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to undermine the importance of what you need, I'm just... I feel like I did that night you saved me on the plane. You're my sister, my sister who is an alien and beats bad guys into the dirt and wears argyle and still yells 'kitty' every time there's a cat you can pet. I want to protect you but I don't know how right now and that's terrifying."

"Oh, Alex... It'll be okay."

"I know, I know. Just come to headquarters as soon as you can, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be right there. I just need to straighten some things out at work I think, Snapper called me like a thousand times last night. Who knows, maybe I'm fired maybe I'm getting a promotion?" The laugh that leaves my lips feels hollow and is laced with anxiety. "And I should probably call Lena."

"Okay, just promise me you'll be safe? And don't do anything until we can figure out just how much the press knows about you."

"I promise."

"And Kara?" I hum in response and can hear the compassion in Alex's voice. "I love you."

"I love you too, sis."

Hanging up the phone, I bury my face into the pillow and let out a small scream. I mean I knew this was going to happen eventually, Lena has the eyes of the city on her right now with her mother's trial going on, but I was hoping to have formed some kind of a game plan before then. All I can hope is that the public gets bored of me pretty quick and moves on to a bigger scandal. Knowing me though, we will have no such luck.

Groaning, I roll over and cover my eyes with my hands. As long as no one figures out my secret identity everything will be fine. I can have J'onn take over for a couple of days, lay low, and hope things blow over. But I seem to be forgetting a key factor in this equation, Lena.

Oh Rao, what does she think of this? Was she embarrassed to be seen with me, is that why she's sorry? Will she want to stop seeing me? Rao, I hope not. Only one way to find out.

The phone is warm in my hand from the sweat of my palms as I dial her number. A picture of her cute face pops up smiling at me with finger guns, a picture she sent me just so I could use it as her contact photo, and a smile comes to my lips. Everything is going to be fine.

"Kara!" Lena is the very busy CEO of a multi-million dollar company and she still picks up for me at this first ring. "I am so sorry! I had no idea we were being followed last night. Oh god, it is all my fault! I don't even know if you're out or ready to take that step in our relationship or even wanted to make us public ever. I just, I am so sorry Kara. I've been dealing with the press my whole life so I'm used to it, but you're used to the other side of things and I suck at this! I-"

"Lena, stop!" I say forcefully and end with an easy chuckle. Now I know what people are thinking when I ramble. "You are so damn cute."

"What?" She says, shocked, making me laugh again.

"You are so cute! And yeah, it sucks, but it's not the end of the world. We can find a way to deal with this. How have you in the past?"

"Well, um, either release an official statement or ignore it completely, no in between. Come over tonight? We can talk about it then. I would say come to my office earlier but the press are swarming here."

"Okay, would 7 be good?"

"Sounds perfect. I have to go but Kara, again, I'm sorry."

"It takes two to tango Lena." The cheesy line feels funny coming from me but still fitting. I kissed her, more than willingly, and now I have to deal with the consequences. "I can't wait to see you later."

"Me either, love."

She hangs up before I can register what she called me, and the term of endearment leaves happy bells ringing in my ears. This is all worth it if I keep my identity secret, which I will, and get to be happy with Lena, which is still kind of up in the air. Here's to hoping, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't thank you guys enough for all of the reads and comments! I love you guys and really hope you're enjoying the story.


	12. What Are We?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this one is a little long but I wanted to lay some groundwork and I hope you enjoy it!

I'm used to people looking at me, having the eyes of the city watching my every move. The thing is, there's usually a nice layer of blue and red spandex on to shield me. Now, as I walk into the office wearing a baby pink sweater and my signature square rimmed glasses, I feel completely raw and exposed.

Self-consciously, I readjust my black skirt for the hundredth time. Coffee tray in hand, I make my way past wide eyed stares and cautious steps back to James's office. He's waiting for me, leaning against the door frame like a very intimidating bouncer. But I see concern and compassion in his soft brown eyes and start to relax a little.

"One milk, two sugar." My voice comes out too high pitched and chipper, making me advert my gaze to the floor.

James takes the outstretched coffee but doesn't sip. "Thank you.:"

I shuffle my feet awkwardly. I can still feel the eyes of the office burning into the back of my knit sweater and braided ponytail.

"I think we need to talk." He gestures to Cat's former office and I'm not sure if he means as a boss or as a friend.

I'm about to step over the threshold, albeit reluctantly, when I hear an angry voice screaming my name. "Danvers, you have ten seconds to get your ass over here or you're fired!" Suddenly talking with James doesn't seem so bad.

"Sorry. Can we do this later?"

"Of course, go." His eyes are still soft as he watches me scurry away, but I can sense the anxiety rolling off him in waves. I hope he can understand…

"Two seconds to spare." Snapper's tone is harsh as he taps his watch a little too forcefully. The rest of the reporting team is gathered around this section of the office pretending not to listen, but it's obvious they're waiting eagerly to hear my fate.

Snapper slams his palm down on the file on the table in front of him, opening it to reveal rather suggestive photos of Lena and I kissing in the snow. "Care to explain this mess, Ponytail?"

"I-well Lena and I, we um-" I swallow the lump in my throat and try to figure out how to word this. For a reporter, I'm surprisingly inept at this. "We're kinda-sorta dating?"

"What the fuck are you thinking?! You realize what this means right? Every article you've ever written that even hints at the Luthors is now considered biased and basically garbage! You can never interview her again, which is a shame because you're the only one she likes and now I guess we know why. What happened, did she bat those long eyelashes and you just melted like some school girl and forgot to do your job?"

His face is red from anger and mine is red from embarrassment. That didn't really occur to me; I was too busy thinking about the Supergirl aspect of it. "We didn't mean for it to happen." I try lamely only to get cut off.

"Oh, the pretty ones never do." The reporter shakes his head in what appears to be regret. "Danvers, are you and Luthor more than a one time thing?"

I genuinely don't know how to reply, so instead I bite my lip and try not to make eye contact. "Well, we're definitely something…"

Snapper crosses his arms over his chest and I can practically see the gears turning in that twisted little brain of his. "Well, in that case you might as well turn in your credentials now! Unless… Ponytail, you're goinh to give us an exclusive interview. I want the inside scoop: Kara Danvers, secret lesbian lover to the fallen from grace Lena Luthor." He sweeps his hands through the air like he can see the headline already.

"It's not like that!"

"Then use this as your chance to tell us what it is like. Rasowski, Danvers, make it happen!"

"Wait, how can we tell the public when we don't even know what we are yet?" I'm starting to panic a bit and I'm sure it shows on my bright red face.

"You better figure it out fast."

"Just give me to tomorrow? I promise I'll do the interview first thing in the morning. Just let me talk to Lena first, we have a date tonight and I'll bring it up then." I literally slap myself in the forehead for letting that last part slip.

Narrowing his eyes and gritting his teeth, Snapper practically growls. "Fine, but we are running a piece today no matter what. Something like, dumb-ass reporter falls for even bigger idiot Lena Luthor."

He's only half joking about the headline but I nod in agreement anyway. "Just no quotes, and everything I said about out date tonight is off the record."

"Deal. Now get out of my office, you're assigned to the tip hotline until further notice."

Feeling somewhat accomplished, I sigh and take my place in the quiet corner of the reporter's room to handle the phones and message boards. Tonight can't come fast enough.

By some miracle, I manage to make it to lunch and avoid James' prying eye and Snapper's anger. However, I can't dodge the terrible headlines from other news sources as they pop up on the computer. For the most part they're focusing on Lena and that only makes me feel worse.

She's been in the public eye her whole life and I'm sure she's used to stuff like this by now, but I don't know how these kinds of headlines wouldn't sting. "Lena Luthor Spiraling Out of Control After Mother's Arrest." "Living Up to The Luthor Name in Scandals." And my personal favorite, "Could Anyone Really Love a Luthor?"

With my brows scrunched together in annoyance I check my phone. No missed messages from Lena but there are a few from Alex. So instead of going home and burying myself under the safety of my many blankets, I head to the DEO to face the only thing that scares me more than Snapper, my sister.

A trip that would normally take me less than 60 seconds now takes me upwards of half an hour. Reporters from other news groups are waiting outside CatCo with flashing cameras and outstretched microphones, hoping to catch a quote from the "nobody reporter who has been corrupted by the Luthors." I ignore them as best as I can and hail a cab like a regular citizen.I don't mind the slight smell of mildew mixed with the mint air freshener or the very talkative driver who has apparently lived a very colorful life, it just takes forever!

Thankfully I wasn't followed so I finally exiting the cab in front of the DEO. I quickly change behind the building faster than the human eye can blink and rush up the white stone steps. Vasquez is the first to spot me and she catches my eye with a shake of her head.

"Good luck Supergirl." She nods to a conference room down the hall apologetically. I x-ray scan to find Alex gesturing wildly to an exasperated looking Maggie and J'onn. My palms start to sweat.

"Thanks, looks like I'll need it." Taking a deep breath, I try to steel myself as I go to greet my fate.

I haven't even stepped fully into the room before Alex starts in. "Finally, what took you so long?"

"I was at work. I had to deal with one pissed off boss." I look to J'onn with pleading eyes. "Please don't make it two."

Shaking his head and pinching the bridge of his nose, J'onn sighs. "Supergirl, you realize what a precarious situation this is right?"

"Of course." I feel like a bad child about to get admonished by my parents.

"Do you, because it doesn't seem like it!'

"Alex…" Maggie says softly, putting a hand on Alex's shoulder. My sister leans back to the touch, calming slightly, but the fear doesn't leave her blazing eyes.

"We are still in control of this, for now." J'onn interjects sternly. "From now on everyone has to be hyper alert. That means no flying unless it is an absolute emergency, no quick costume changes unless you're in a secure location. We're only going to use burner phones to communicate with or about Supergirl and what we do here."

The Martian passes out small phones, each in a different color case. "Sweet!" Maggie whispers excitedly and opens her yellow one. "Clone club is so on."

Alex just rolls her eyes affectionately at her girlfriend and chuckles. I'm glad that she finally seems to be relaxing.

"We want you to be happy Kara." J'onn wraps his strong arms around my shoulders. "Is this really what you want?"

I look around at the faces of my family, all watching with looks of love and concern. "More than anything."

"What if the public finds out who you really are?"

"We won't let that happen." J'onn points to the map on the wall. "But we've prepared for events like this before. The DEO base in Roswell is developing a drug from the roots of a tree on Aldera, a planet in the Vortex galaxy. It has very potent memory altering properties and we believe it can be used on a large scale like this."

Alex breathes a sigh of relief but my stomach clenches in knots. That doesn't feel right to me, but I may not have a choice.

"For now, try to lie low. Only speak to the press if you absolutely must. And what about Miss Luthor, you haven't told her yet have you? Can she be trusted?"

"Yes." I reply without hesitation. I'm certain of it. I just don't know if she's ready to hear it…

"But can you be 100% sure?"

"Alex, she did save all of the aliens in National City by betraying her only family and I'm pretty sure she loves me so…"

"Just wait until all of this blows over. It's just too risky right now."

"Yeah." Maggie chimes in. "They're only all over it so much because of everything going on with her mom. Lena being gay is old news, they're just feeding off the negative press from the trial."

"Can you at least TRY to wait?" Alex can read me like a book. She knows that I'm dying inside waiting to tell Lena.

Unfortunately, I see where they're coming from. It could put Lena and I in danger, even more so than we already are. "Okay." I finally agree. "I will try."

My family looks satisfied with that and I'm happy, until my sister looks up at me with wide eyes. "have you told Clark and Eliza yet?"

Crap… "Ummm, no? I will later!" Alex gives me that knowing look because we both know I definitely won't. "So um, I gotta go. I'll see you guys later."

"Be safe kid." Maggie says with a clap on the back.

"Be smart!" Alex and J'onn add in perfect unison, making us all smile widely.

"When am I not?"

I speed off before I can hear their sarcastic retorts. Despite the stress I'm under right now my heart races with excitement. I get to see Lena tonight and I can't wait!

The rest of the afternoon passes by painfully slowly. I keep checking my watch but the seconds seem to tick by slower every time. I stop a robbery in midtown, it only takes all of twenty minutes but at least it gets my mind off of that picture for a little bit. Every time I think of Lena, of her warm body against mine and the cold snow falling around us, little shivers run down my spine and my cheeks flush bright red. This is technically our third date, maybe we'll pick up from where we left off?

That only makes my heart pound faster and nervous energy build up in the pit of my stomach. I can't take this! Giving in to the itch in my fingers, I pull out my phone and dial the beautiful brunette who is consuming my thoughts.

It's only 5:00, she's probably still at the office, and by the third ring I feel my chest beginning to deflate. Oh well, two more hours isn't so bad. Just as it's about to go to voicemail, Lena's sultry voice rings in my ears.

"Kara, hi! Funny, I was just about to call you."

"You were? I hope not to cancel!"

"No, definitely not." She says with a small chuckle, but it seems to be weighed down by stress and exasperation.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah. It's just that, well my building has excellent security and no one would be able to get up uninvited, but getting into my building may be a bit challenging." She sighs and I can practically picture the signature lip bite she's doing right now.

"I'm sorry babe." When did we start with the pet names? I don't know, but I can't deny how good it feels to call her babe so easily.

"No, it's no big deal really. I just don't want it to make you uncomfortable." She is too sweet I'm going to melt!

"Aw, Lena it's okay. I'm fast remember, I'll get right by them."

"Still… Would it be okay if we went to yours tonight?"

"Of course!" Crap, I'm seriously going to need to clean! "Come over whenever you're ready. I'll order Chinese."

"Thank you, Kara." Her voice is still laced with stress but I can hear the excitement too. "See you soon love." With a click the line goes dead and I'm left clutching the phone to my heart.

After I'm doing basking in the glorious feeling of being called 'love' by Lena Luthor, I snap into action and clean up the messy apartment as fast as possible. Alex calls it a bomb area but I prefer the term organized chaos. Between being a reporter and Supergirl I don't have much time to worry about exactly where I throw my laundry after a long day.

Just in case, I manage the tasks without the help of super speed. It's tedious and time consuming but at least my home now looks presentable. Smiling to myself in accomplishment, I do a final sweep of the open floor plan before calling and placing the food order.

As I'm hanging up, I can vaguely make up the noise of high heels approaching my door. They pause in front of the apartment and I hear Lena's heart begin to thump in her chest just a little bit louder before she raises her hand to knock. "Come in, it's open!"

Lena opens the door as I'm still moving to greet her, but the sight of her stops me in my tracks. She must not have changed before work and, though I now feel slightly under dressed in my blazer and jeans, she looks stunning. Her dark hair is pulled back in a perfect bun that my fingers are already itching to mess up and her makeup has not a single smudge. To accommodate the chilly weather, Lena has on a thick red and black coat that honestly looks more like a cloak someone traversing the woods would wear. She slides it down her smooth, flawless arms to reveal a sleeve less black dress that falls just below the knee.

She must catch me staring with my jaw practically on the floor because she gives me a suggestive wink. "I had a lot of important meetings today that I had to dress up for."

I swallow the lump in my throat before replying. "Well you look great."

"Thank you." I take the coat, hanging it up in the closet but my eyes never leave Lena. A slight red flush creeps into her cheeks and she adverts her gaze down. "But I'm afraid it's super uncomfortable when worn for more than four hours at a time. Could I maybe borrow something to change? I would have changed at my apartment but I didn't want to bother with the press."

It takes me a moment to snap out of my trance but when I do, I smile widely. "Of course! We've both had pretty stressful days, let's just get comfy and relax."

Lena smiles appreciatively and follows me to the bedroom. She pauses just outside the entrance, slightly unsure if she's allowed in, but I take her soft hand in mine and lead her inside.

She's a little shorter than me, but probably about the same size, so I rummage through the closet and hand her a pair of yoga pants and my old National City University sweatshirt. "It's probably the most comfortable thing I own. You can change in here; I'll go to the bathroom."

My fingers trail down Lena's arm as I turn to leave her to change and she closes her eyes softly at the touch. The sensation of her skin won't leave my mind as I close the bathroom door behind me and take off my blazer in favor of the oversized t-shirt I grabbed for myself. I focus on that instead of the sound of rustling clothes and slightly uneven breathing in the other room. Rao help me…

I lounge on the couch, waiting for Lena, and once she steps out of the room my heart lurches in my chest almost violently. Who knew seeing her in my clothes would get this kind of reaction? But I feel intense heat in my cheeks and low in my belly and have to swallow a shaky breath.

"How do I look?" Lena spins in a mock fashion show, giggling as she twirls.

"Beautiful."

My mouth hangs open as I search for more words and I must look like a total idiot. Thankfully the doorbell rings and I start to smell the addicting, wonderful scent of Noonan's potstickers. "Foods here!"

Grateful to be busy with something else, I eagerly get the food, tip good old Robby, and start to make our plates. "Wine is in the fridge if you want some." Lena smiles, almost shyly, and digs through the cabinets until she finds two glasses and starts to fill them. The whole thing feels so domestic it makes my heart swell.

"What'd you order?" Quirking her eyebrow, Lena comes to inspect the spread. She leans against me, one hand holding her wine to her lips and the other lightly playing with my fingers. She rests her head on my shoulder, hair tickling my cheek. It feels magical.

"I didn't know what you liked so I got a little of everything, and whatever you don't like I'll finish."

Lena nods in approval and kisses my cheek. "So thoughtful. And with the metabolism of a teenager to boot."

I blush and adjust my glasses out of habit. "I try." Lena winks again, making my knees almost buckle, but I shake it off when the grumbling in my stomach becomes too loud to ignore. "Come one, let's eat."

Lena follows me to the couch and the two of us settle in. I can tell that the picture must be weighing on heavy on her mind, and it is for me too, but for now we just eat and enjoy each other's company.

Snow falls in light flurries against my window, coating the glass with icy frost. Inside it is warm and comfortable, snuggled on the couch with Lena, and I don't think I ever want to move.

"Hey Kara?" Lena puts her half-finished plate down and looks at me with beautiful, wide, loving eyes. She bites her lip nervously and then the edges of her lips turn up into a small, genuine smile.

I have an entire potsticker in my mouth at this point and my cheeks flush from embarrassment. Lena only chuckles and smiles wider.

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S: I know the chapter titles are pretty lame but I always appreciate it when other authors include them so why not.


	13. Puzzle Pieces

"Girlfriends?" My mouth is still full of potstickers, strands of my long blonde hair have fallen in front of my eyes, I'm wearing a pasta sauce stained t-shirt that is older than this building, and my words come out sounding more like an incoherent jumble of syllables. But Lena's green eyes light up like kyrptonite and the sound of her easy laugh makes me dizzy with happiness.

"Yeah, girlfriends. I mean, if you want to." Lena folds her hands in her lap and leans back against the soft fabric of my couch. I can tell she's trying to look casual because I haven't actually said yes but the excitement in her eyes and the way she bites the corner of her full red lips gives her away.

I'm grinning from ear to ear as I quickly try to swallow so I can respond properly, but in my excitement I forget to finish chewing. Typical. Choking slightly, I cough and have to down the rest of my water. Lena's soft hand rubs my back in soothing circles as I try to catch my breath.

"Jeez, are you okay?" Her hopeful expression falters and is replaced with nerves and concern. My coughing is slowing down but hasn't stopped so I hold up a finger asking her to wait a second, but Lena keeps talking anyway. "I mean, we don't have to label anything if you're not ready. God, I don't even know if you're out or feel as strongly for me as I do for you. I just thought that maybe-"

"Yes!" Finally! I sit up straight and smile widely, leg bouncing with nervous excitement. Lena looks slightly surprised and more than a little relieved.

Her shoulders relax as she releases the breath she didn't even realize she was holding. "Really?"

"Yes, dork!" I don't know if she's more surprised that I said yes to being her girlfriend or actually calling the brilliant Lena Luthor a dork to her face, either way she looks amused and thrilled. "I like you Lena, like a lot, ever since we first met. You challenge me, make me see the world from a different point of view; you're just so interesting and beautiful to me. And you've always been nothing but thoughtful and kind and generous. I know I almost blew it before, with the probing questions when I should have just been honest and then not giving you the space you needed, but I'm so SO grateful that we can give us a chance. I l-"

That dangerous four letter word almost falls from my lips. The word that spins around my head late at night and keeps me up, gazing at the stars for answers. So I stop myself, bite my lip and look to Lena. She's watching me with an unreadable expression, something akin to understanding and fear. Like she's dangling at the edge of a cliff and I hold all the power to either push her off or pull her in and she genuinely doesn't know what I'll do.

"I just, I really care about you Lena. So yes, I would be honored to be your girlfriend."

I've never seen the mighty Lena Luthor look so vulnerable. "You are so special, Kara Danvers."

She opens her mouth and it looks like she's going to say something else, but then she meets my gaze and her green eyes seem to darken. Her red lips curl up into an almost wicked grin, making my heart skip and jump in my chest.

Even with my heightened senses I'm still stunned when my girlfriend, wow I'm going to need to get used to saying that, lurches out of her seat. In an instant her hands are on either side of my head and her knees are on either side of my hips, effectively pinning me between her heated body and the couch. Her long, dark hair falls forward to tickle my cheek and I bite my lip as I gently brush it behind her ear. Lena shivers at the touch, tilting her chin forward so that her lips barely touch mine.

"I really care about you too, Kara Danvers." Her voice is a whisper that makes my whole body shudder. I feel so many emotions radiating from the gorgeous woman on top of me that my head starts to spin. My hands grip her smooth hips, sneaking under the worn fabric of my college hoodie, and I try to hold on to this incredible new reality.

Lena's lips move softly, purposefully with mine. Her tongue darts out when I moan, running it against white teeth. Her long, slender fingers are in my hair, caressing my scalp and using the leverage to press her firm body to mine. My hands begin to wander further under her shirt, seeking out more and more smooth pale skin. When I run a finger down the delicate curve of her spine Lena drops her head to my neck, moaning my name softly and nipping the sensitive skin there.

At the feel of her teeth on me, my hips jolt upwards unexpectedly and with a little more force than I intended. Lena just grins again and presses down more firmly, her thighs effectively pinning me back down. Of course, if I really wanted, I could break free in an instant, but all I really want to do right now is literally rip my hoodie off of her.

Lena must have a similar thought because suddenly she's playing with the neck of my t-shirt, lips back to kissing and licking a trail up to my ear. Thank Rao my super suit is safe in the closet! The quick thought makes me pause and a slightly guilty feeling settles in the pit of my stomach...

"I've been wanting this since that night in the kitchen." Lena's voice is deeper than normal and the low tone sends me spiraling back to the moment. "Since I first saw you in my office really."

"Really?" Lena's low chuckle sends shivers of desire right through me. Wow, I am so lucky I get to call this woman mine!

"Really. The whole glasses, notepad, and soft curls thing, completely charming. Then I saw the secret steel underneath that adorable sweater and I was enchanted." The way she says enchanted, how each syllable rolls off her tongue and how her eyes slicker back to my lips has me dizzy.

"What do you mean?" I want to get lost in the moment again, in Lena, but the specific word choice of steel sends up a tiny red flag. It's probably just coincidence, right? "Secret steel?"

Lena sits back a bit, still on my lap and eyes still several shades darker than normal. Her fingers trace patterns across my jaw, making me blush and lean into her touch. "You never give yourself enough credit. You're soft yet strong, oblivious yet brilliant. You have so much inside of you Kara, whole worlds I think, and I'm guessing sometimes that scares you. Not everybody sees it though, do they? They see a wide-eyed reporter with a smile like sunshine, but never the anger or passion or countless other dimensions. But I see you Kara, because we're the same, and I think you see me too." 

My lip actually hurts from how hard I'm biting it. She may know, she may not, either way Lena understands me. She's right, we may be opposites in some respects but at the end of the day we are two puzzle pieces, each with jagged, messy edges that fit together perfectly.

I gather Lena up in my arms, hands firm and needy around her waist as she cups my cheeks. Tears sting my eyes as I kiss this beautiful woman passionately. There's no other way to describe the tidal wave of emotions surging inside me, love.

This kiss is different, deeper some how and more tender. I love the way we move together without hesitation, effortlessly meeting the other every step of the way. A fire burns low in my belly and intensely in my chest, blazing through my entire body without consuming me, just bringing me to the edge and leaving me to teeter. Lust is still there, tugging at my fingers, but our embrace is one of something more pure than physical longing. It's love...

I feel Lena's chest heaving against mine and hear the murmur of her heart speed erratically as I hold her even closer. Every part of my skin that touches hers feels like it's glowing with electricity and I never want to move away. So I don't. Lena and I keep kissing, both unwilling to end this beautiful game we're playing. 

Her fingers lightly scratch down my neck, making me arch my back and press my forehead to hers. "Stay tonight? Please." 

Lena's breath catches in her throat and she looks at me with eyes like kryptonite. "There's no where else I'd rather be, love."

My hands are on her hips again, effortlessly lifting her off my lap and to her feet. Lena looks at me with mild surprise, but primarily confusion, until I take her hand and look towards the bedroom. Understanding followed by arousal play across her sharp features and I'm left breathless. She's so beautiful.

As our fingers intertwine and I begin to lead us down the hall, the television, that I forgot had even been on, flashes and blares: "Breaking News! At 9:30 pm Lillian Luthor attempted a jailbreak from Bellview prison, where she is being held in maximum security for the duration of her multiple life sentences."

Lena immediately stiffens and her hand falls from mine to clench into a fist at her side. As she turns to face the TV she's practically shaking.

"Information is still coming in, but it appears that the FBI's special task force was able to foil the diabolical Luthor's plot without much incident. The prison has released an official statement, claiming that the jailbreak was the collaborative efforts of multiple inmates led by the matriarch Luthor and measures are being taken to prevent this from ever happening again. Thankfully, no one was seriously injured during the fray."

"Mom." The word falls from Lena's lips so quietly that anyone without super hearing would have missed it. She's looking at the report with watery eyes and her jaw clenched tight. 

"Lena..." I gently wrap my arm around her waist. At first she tenses at the touch, but she looks at me with this pleading expression and melts into the embrace, resting against my side. "I'm so sorry Lena." 

"It doesn't make sense." Lena grits her teeth and fiddles with the stings of my sweatshirt. 

"What do you mean?"

"My mother is the only person in the world who could best Lex in chess. She was a master, always looking ten moves ahead, analyzing every possible outcome, assessing every situation. I was only able to trick her because she thought she had already won..."

"What are you saying?" 

Lena looks back at the TV as it plays footage from inside the prison, showing her mother, a colorful group of criminals, and a bunch of armed guards in a brawl. "I hate to say it, but my mother is smarter than that." She gestures to the screen. "If she had the resources to set this up then she should be free, terrorizing the streets of National City by now."

"Maybe the FBI just out smarter her this time?" It sounds lame as soon as I say it but Lena just shakes her head.

"I guess it doesn't matter. My mother is where she belongs."

Lena dips her head so that her dark chocolate hair hides her stinging eyes and red cheeks. "Hey." I gently sweep the hair from her eyes and tug her a little closer. "You're nothing like her."

She forces a small chuckle that slowly turns into a genuine smile. "Now you're starting to sound like Supergirl! Thank you though, that means a lot to me Kara." 

"Supergirl, nah, no way, impossible! She's like, crazy good and I have a mean streak..." I trail off as I notice Lena starting to really laugh.

"You, mean? Never. Ah, now but naughty..." Her perfectly manicured nails blaze a path from my kiss-swollen lips, down my flushed neck, and to the place low on my chest where my heart is thudding loudly. "I think you can be quite naughty." 

Lena quirks an eyebrow and I have to swallow the lump in my throat. When I'm finally able to talk to my voice is surprisingly confident. "Wouldn't you like to know."

"I would." Lena is grinning again, but I can see the weight of this new development heavy in her eyes and the tension in her shoulders that had not been there before.

Lightly I kiss the corner of her mouth, lips barely grazing hers. "Soon, babe."

Lena rests her head on my chest as her body shudders slightly. "Oh god, what are we going to tell the press?"

I cringe at the thought. I had totally forgotten about my interview tomorrow! "Um, well about that... Snapper, my boss, well he kind of threatened to fire me if I didn't do an exclusive interview tomorrow morning."

Lena's voice is like ice and it actually scares me a little. "If he messes with you Kara, I swear to god I can have him gone in a second." I don't doubt it and I feel bad for actually considering it for a split second.

"No, he is a jerk with a huge superiority complex, but he's nothing I can't handle. I'll let you know though." I wink and Lena giggles, the sweet sound making my heart sing, but I sigh when I think about tomorrow again. "But what do I tell him?"

"Well, from my experience, it's best to just come out and say it. If we don't it'll only get worse, especially with my mother's name in the press too. If you're comfortable that is?"

I nod definitively. I may have had my apprehension in the begin, confused about what it meant to be bisexual, but now I'm sure of myself and my feelings. "I'm in a relationship with Lena Luthor! There, I said it!"

Lena smiles widely and threads her fingers through my hair. "Have I ever told you that you're beautiful?"

I can't help the blush that moves to cover my cheeks with bright red splotches. With my arms around her waist, I pull my girlfriend close and kiss her with smiling lips. "Dork."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this story has certainly evolved from when I started brainstorming the first chapter, so thank you so much for sticking with me this whole time! We still have a ways to go but I'm glad you're enjoying the ride. Comments make my day/week/year.


	14. It's Always Been About You

The cold December air feels nice on my skin as I sit atop the DEO headquarters, looking out over the city that I protect and love. I needed a break, from the countless emails cluttering my inbox begging for an interview, the interview I already did this morning that I'm certain I blew, and trying to figure out this case with Lillian Luthor that is getting no where.

So I let my senses roam free, listening to the collective buzz of tires on slippery streets, the wind flickering through Christmas pines, children laughing with their noses pressed to shop windows, and just the resounding hum of National City.

My mind stops at each sound, focusing only on that particular noise until it fills my head and then move on to the next. I try not to pick out conversations, I don't want to invade their privacy, but some people just sound so sad... I wish I could hug them without it being weird. Christmas is right around the corner, just under two weeks away now, and no one should feel alone during the holidays.

Then there's the angry people, the ones who are holding up this mornings newspapers and yelling at the cover, pointing to a smug looking Lillian Luthor in her mugshot and either agreeing with her or wishing she had gotten the death penalty. I tune those people out quickly.

Humans feel everything so deeply. They love with every ounce of themselves and hate just the same. They have a tremendous capacity for evil as well as good, and even with so much loneliness and anger and pain there's this ever present, unrelenting kindness about them. Lena is a perfect example of this. Everything in her life, everything she was taught, shoved her head first towards the darker reality of this world, yet time and time again she has risen above and been her own hero.

I know some think I'm jaded, but I truly love the humans, and sometimes... I almost forget I'm not one of them. Lena makes me forget. I love being an alien, I love my culture, I love all the good I can do for this world, but the weight of my own world is a constant heaviness on my shoulders. Kal may have been born there, but he never spoke the language, never danced or celebrated our holidays, he'll never truly know the loss that I feel every single day.

But Lena makes me feel like I belong here. Out of all the galaxies, all the planets, all the possible time lines, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be. Here on earth, with Lena and Alex and all the confused, angry, loving people in this city. This is my home, and being here to share it with Lena is making me love it even more.

"You look happy." My sister's voice is soft and sweet, two things I don't generally associate with Alex. She sits on the ledge beside me, our legs dangling off the side, swinging back and forth along with the winter wind. Alex's holstered gun bumps my thigh as she settles in and I can't help but chuckle.

"I am." I smile at my sister and then back down at the sprawling expanse of the city.

"You know I'm really happy for you, right?" Alex looks at me sternly, worry etched across her sharp features.

"Of course!" She softens again and I rest my head on her strong shoulder. "And you know I'm really proud of you? Like super, crazy, insanely proud for everything you've ever accomplished and so so lucky that your my sister."

"I know." Her voice is just a whisper and I tilt my head up at her. Her cheeks are turning pink from the bite of the breeze and I notice the tension in the knit of her eyebrows. "I love you Kara. I just want you to be safe."

I nod in understanding before cuddling closer, letting my natural warmth radiate to her. "Still no leads, I'm guessing?"

"No." Alex says with a heavy sigh. "It's just not adding up... She took advantage of the guards as they changed shifts, barely a ten second window, she had the cells of certain prisoners unlocked with help from Cadmus on the outside. It was a perfect storm and we're lucky no one was killed and no prisoners escaped."

She pinches the bridge of her nose, looking remarkably like J'onn when he does that, so much so that I have to stifle a laugh. Instead I sit up and rub my sister's shoulders. She leans into the touch and sighs again. "I feel like we're missing something, Kara. It's like she lined all the dominoes up and didn't push them over..."

My fingers still from working out the knot at the base of her neck and I bite my lip. "That makes me think of something Lena said the other night. You're right, Lillian had all this in place and it seems like she gained nothing from it, but what if her primary motivation wasn't really to escape, it was a diversion."

"Shit." Alex grumbles and furrows her brows. "Come on, we need to review those tapes again."

Leaving the beautiful view of my city, my sister and I hurry back inside the DEO. My heart feels like it's in the pit of my stomach and not my chest where it belongs, and as we review all the evidence my mind keeps going back to Lena and how this all implicates her, when I should be focusing on the case.

"Okay." Maggie says with frustration as she drops a thin file on the desk. "My team has been working round the clock trying to figure out how this could happen in the first place and this is all we got." She rubs her forehead, clearly exasperated. "Basically money can buy you anything and stupid people are greedy and stupid."

Maggie flops down into a chair while Alex flips through the file. She pauses at one of the pages and looks up with wide eyes. "Wait, this was supposed to be the guard taking over to watch Lillian?"

"Yep, meet Charlie Hansen aka greedy idiot." Alex holds up the picture of a young man in an army uniform with an honest looking face.

"Vasquez, can you play the footage again?" Alex must be on to something but no else seems to be on the same page, so I lean forward and try to focus on the same video I've watched a hundred times by now. "There, stop the tape!"

Jumping out of her seat, Alex holds the photo next to the guard on the screen. Maggie jolts forward, apparently seeing it too. "Son of a bitch!"

I squint my eyes, still oblivious. Alex points to the pink scar down the young soldiers eyebrow and then to the same spot on the man in the video, no scar. The quality is some what fuzzy, but Alex is definitely on to something. "So who is that?"

"We need to find out." J'onn says sternly.

He's about to delegate orders when I notice something else in the background of the frame. "Wait..." Punches are being thrown, numerous bodies are in the midst of the attack, but there in the middle is Lillian Luthor. There's something small and white peaking out of her closed fist as she goes to attack a guard. I continue to play the tape and watch closely as the mysterious flash of white disappears into the pocket of that very same guard.

Alex notices too and crosses her arms over her chest. "A letter. You were right Kara, Lillian didn't want to escape, she wanted to send a message."

"But to who?"

The answer is obvious in my mind and my heart screams at me to fly away right now to warn her. "Lena. It has to be for Lena, she's the reason Lillian is in there in the first place, she must want revenge and to hurt her-"

Alex put her hand on my back firmly but soothingly. "We can't jump to conclusions, Supergirl."

"Before we do anything else, we need to find out who exactly that is." J'onn points to the man impersonating young Charlie Hansen. "And I think it's time we take another pass at that Cadmus assassin you took down Supergirl."

My heart races in my chest and my hands clench into fists without conscious effort. "Let me take care of him." My teeth grind together so hard that my jaw hurts.

"We'll handle it together." I have to control myself not to super speed down to the cells and smash him against the wall until he tells me everything. I wish I had done it sooner! But Alex's steady hand on my shoulder keeps me beside them. "Let me take the lead for now."

"For now." I agree with a nod. J'onn types in the code and the large metal door swings open to reveal the man who attacked Lena and I in the snow that night only a few days ago. Over those few days, he hasn't given away any information other than that he's with Cadmus; that's about to change.

Before he can react, J'onn has reinforced cuffs around the assassin and has strapped him to the rickety, rusty chair. Instead of looking surprised, the assassin just cackles and grins, staring at me in particular. "So the woman of steel finally graces me with her presence. That can only mean Miss Luthor has made her move." His dark eyes are gleaming with excitement and it makes my stomach sick.

"Who is this man?" Alex holds out her phone with a picture of the impostor.

"I know him, but I'll only speak to her. Everyone else out!"

"It's okay, I got this." My family eyes me skeptically, but if this is what it takes to get answers it's a no brainer. They leave cautiously and I can hear their speeding heart beats just on the other side of the door. "So who is he?"

"His name is Mikey Donovon. He's a nobody, someone they picked just because he looked close enough to who they wanted and was desperate enough to do whatever they asked for the right price. But don't you have bigger questions you want to ask, dear Supergirl?" Narrowing my eyes, I watch his twisted expression and a shudder runs down my spine. "Are you sure there's nothing you want to know about your darling, traitorous Lena?"

"Shut your mouth about her..."

"Why?" His crooked, yellow toothed smile makes me even more uneasy. "Does talking about that little bitch get you all hot and bothered? I don't blame you really, she is a tight piece, if you're into the whole corporate backstabbing look-"

"I said, shut your mouth!" Bright red covers my field of vision and it's all I can see as I fly across the room and slam my fist into his stomach. The assassin screams in pain, head tipped back and coughing up hot, red blood. When his head falls forward his smile is nothing short of diabolical and it makes my heart drop to my stomach.

"The night I attacked you confirmed it for Miss Luthor. It's never been about Lena, never. Though she did surprise us with Medusa, she's never been more than a pawn, a prop if you will. No, it's always been about you... Kara Danvers."

The scream that rips free from my throat is violent and primal, like something within me snapped and needed to escape. My whole body tingles yet feels numb all at the same time. My head feels heavy and is spinning faster than Barry can run. This means Lillian knows who I am, she knows who my family is, how to hurt me!

Heat pours out of my eyes before I can stop it. It blasts through the walls of the cell, causing rocks to crumble and smash to the ground around us. It feels like fire as it rips through me, hurtling towards the evil man in front of me. Some distant part of me is begging, screaming for me to stop but it's too late, the lasers have already left my eyes.

In a flash of black and green, J'onn throws the thug out of the line of fire, narrowly avoiding the strike himself. Arms are flung around me and a cold body is pressed to my back. I know who they belong to, I know I can shake free in an instant, but I hear my sister's ragged breathing and terrified whispers and I freeze in her embrace. "Calm down Kara. I'm here. I'm here. It's going to be okay, I got you."

All the strength leaves my body at once and I collapse against my sister, letting her guide us both to our knees. I clutch her jacket, fisting the fabric between my fingers so hard that I hear the stitches tare. "I'm so sorry Alex."

"It's okay. Shhh, shh it's okay." The tremble in my sister's voice and the way her fingers shake as she runs them through my hair lets me know that no, everything is not okay.

Tears pour from my blue eyes instead of the fire, but it stings just as bad. "What's going to happen now?"

With a rough finger, Alex tips my chin up so I'm forced to look into her intense brown eyes. "I don't know, but we can figure it out, we always do." Sniffling, I nod and rest my head in the crook of my sister's neck. "Come on honey." I let Alex gently help me to my feet and I look around the ruined cell. Thankfully J'onn has gotten that awful thug out of here and the two of them are no where to be seen, probably resuming the interrogation with slightly less lethal techniques.

My whole body feels heavy as I follow Alex back to the main floor. Noticing the look on her girlfriend's face, Maggie is beside us in seconds, helping to hold me up. "What happened?" Alex just shakes her head and Maggie takes the hint.

I don't know how, but the two of them manage to get me home. I'm tucked in my fuzzy pajamas with a cup of hot cocoa and freshly installed security measures before I'm done processing everything that happened today. It's like a cloud hangs in my mind, dark and full of thunder. I keep hearing the assassin say my name and it makes a fresh wave of nausea shake me.

Me keeping my secret identity is the only thing between the bad guys and the people I love. Yes, they are all capable of taking care of themselves, but I couldn't live with myself if they get hurt because of me. My one solace is that the general public doesn't know, and I'm going to do everything in my power to keep it that way. Well that, and Lena.

As the sun sets, every time I close my eyes I see her burning green eyes blazing back at me. I see the curve of her jaw and the slope of her neck as I kissed down her body last night, the way her red lips parted as we connected in ways that I didn't even know where possible on this planet or any other. Then I see that perfect expression of pleasure getting twisted into one of unbearable pain and my eyes fly open and my body jolts straight up on the couch, chest heaving in fear. Before today, my identity being compromised was just a theory, now it's reality and I don't know what to do.

The clock on my nightstand glows, only 8:30. Lena will still be up and I haven't heard from her since she left my bed this morning, except for a few quick texts letting her know how the interview wentl. I'm craving the comfort only she can give me and before I know it my cellphone is pressed to my ear and I'm holding my breath waiting for her sweet voice.

"Kara, hi." After work Lena's voice is usually heavy with stress but tonight it is positively saturated with it.

"Hey, um is everything okay?"

"Not really." She says with a heavy sigh. I hear the sound of a pen scratching against paper.

"Still at work?"

"Unfortunately. Even from behind bars my mother makes my life infinitely more difficult."

"Come over? I had a really, really rough day and I can't get you out of my head..." I hear her breath catch in her throat and the pounding of her heart as I wait for a reply. "Please."

"Okay love, I'll be right there."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading everyone! I'm having a really rough time lately and your comments and kudos mean the world to me. I'm already working on the next chapter so you can expect that soon, complete with some answers.


	15. We Should've Stayed In Bed

A warm, safe feeling surrounds me, drifting over my exposed skin and pulling me close. I feel the tickle of soft hair and the whisper of warm breath on my neck as sleep tugs at my heavy eyelids, willing me to drift back into an easy, peaceful slumber. But delicate fingers are dancing across the curve of my spine and lips softer than rose petals are ghosting over my collarbone, and they are far more inviting.

"Mmmm." I hum at the gentle touches and nuzzle deeper into the embrace.

Her fingers trail up and around to my face, lightly mapping the slope of my jaw and the hills of my cheek bones. Part of me wants to open my eyes to greet what I'm sure is a beautiful sight, but the other part wants to squeeze my eyelids shut tight and loose myself in the moment.

"You slept with your glasses on." Lena's voice is so gentle and so vulnerable.

She traces the grove my glasses have left on my temples and her fingers wrap around the frame to remove them. "No!" I pop my eyes open and quickly reach up to still her hand. She looks at me with mild amusement and a hint of confusion. "It's a bad habit of mine." I say quickly, lifting them up ever so slightly to rub the sleep from my eyes. "But I'm as blind as a bat without them and I really want to see your beautiful face." It's only half a lie but I feel completely guilty about it.

A faint rosy blush creeps into Lena's cheeks and she kisses the corner of my mouth before pulling back with a slightly mischievous smile. "Like what you see?"

I pretend to take my time looking her up and down, propping myself up on my arm to get a better look. Her normally straight dark hair is tossed in wild waves around her sharp jaw and smooth shoulders. Her makeup has washed away and somehow her skin looks even more flawless than before. She has a very tiny scar at the edge of her left eyebrow that I had never noticed before and it calls out for me to kiss it.

"No, I don't like it." I say in my best fake-serious voice. Lena doesn't buy it for a second. "I love it!"

My girlfriend laughs and squirms under my lips, hands flat on my chest and leg hooked around my strong calf. "You're such a nerd, Kara."

"Says the biggest dork I ever met!"

Lena just rolls her eyes and snuggles closer. She caresses the base of my neck and pulls me in for a deep, beautiful kiss. The chemistry flows so easily between us that it makes me dizzy.

When I feel her smile against my lips I pull away and wrap my arms around her in a tight hug. "You are so beautiful."

"Thank you." Lena whispers, breath falling hot on my neck.

She sighs with content and rolls onto her back, covering her eyes with her arm. The blankets slip down to reveal creamy skin that has my mouth going dry. "So beautiful." I whisper, mostly to myself.

"Oh stop." Lena says with a laugh, playfully slapping my shoulder as her blush deepens. She stretches over to the nightstand to grab her phone and I watch in amazement, mesmerized by soft curve of her hips and the way her abs flex.

I quickly dart my eyes away as she notices me staring and reach for my own phone. Lena takes this as an opportunity to cuddle up, pressing her back to my front and wiggling into little spoon position. I could definitely get used to this!

Lena checks her work email, which is very full for only 8:30 in the morning, and I make sure I don't have any missed texts. Normally I wake up in the middle of the night if I get a text, my super hearing just automatically tunes into it, but for some reason I was out so deep last night that I didn't even hear Lena waking up first. Thankfully there are none and I put my phone away to nuzzle against my girlfriend's shoulder.

She holds up her phone so that I can see the screen. It's the CatCo homepage, and right there, the first thing you open up to, is my interview from the other day. It's a messy headline, but not all together damaging like a lot of the others.

Lena starts to pick bits out to read aloud and my palms get clammy. "When asked to describe her feelings for the powerful business woman, Miss Danvers found herself at a loss for words before finally settling on, 'Complicated. Lena is complicated and so am I, and we're still trying to figure out how to make all the complicated pieces of our lives fit together.' 'Would you say you two are in love?' 'Love is a strong word and I have strong feelings for Lena; that's all I can say for now."

Lena's green eyes are wide and a shade darker than usual as she turns her head back to look at me. "Well done, I wouldn't of guessed this was your first interview handling this sort of situation."

Shrugging, I bite my lip and offer, "I guess I was just thinking: what would the great Lena Luthor do?" I don't know if I'm grateful or upset that she didn't address the love question.

Lena chuckles and turns back to the article, scrolling down to finish. Her eyes scan the page while a small smile tugs at her lips until she gets to the last paragraph. "Now Miss Danvers, the Luthors are notorious for their anti-alien views while you are known to be a prominent alien supporter. What do you think Lillian Luthor thinks about someone so pro-alien being with her daughter and possibly tarnishing the Luthor name?' 'I don't care. I don't care what she thinks at all, I only care about how Lena feels. Lena is nothing like her mother. Her legacy is so different from her family's; she believes in hope and unity and progress and I have to believe that her mother would be proud of that. We don't need Lillian's approval; Lena Luthor is her own hero."

Lena chews on that last sentence, turning the words over and over in her head. I can practically see the gears of her beautiful mind working. I didn't even realize it during the interview, but I said something very similar to her as Supergirl during the whole Medusa disaster. She has to be putting the pieces together...

"Lena, I um, I'm sorry. I wasn't ready for them to bring up your mother so I kind of got flustered. I told him not to put that bit in..."

Turning over and putting her phone down, Lena looks at me with a mischevious grin. "Reporters huh? I guess they can't be trusted."

I know she means it as a joke, just to make light of a slightly painful situation, but I can't help but feel like there was a slightly more meaningful connotation under her playful tone. Laughing awkwardly, I nod my head and readjust my glasses. "I guess not."

Lena watches me carefully but I avoid the piercing force of her gaze until she sighs heavily. "I don't want to, but I have to go to work."

"Aww, but it's Saturday!" Automatically, I pull out the signature pout and bat my long eyelashes.

"No!" Lena covers her eyes and swings her legs over the side of the bed. "Not fair, that pout is fuckin lethal!" Fun fact I'm learning about Lena the more we spend time together, she has the mouth of a sailor without even meaning to. I think she got used to cursing so much that it just became part of her normal vocabulary outside of the office, but I find it oddly endearing.

"Pleaseeee." I know I'm being childish, but I'd do anything to see her face light up with a smile the way it is right now. "You're the boss, you can give yourself a day off."

"I am the boss..." Her gazed drifts to the ceiling as if she's actually considering it. I can't take my eyes off her gorgeous figure as she rises from my bed, still starkly naked from our adventures the night before. I relish the way her muscles flex as she runs her fingers through her long wavy hair in an attempt to tame it, and how her soft chest rises and falls with each steady breath.

"So stay!"

Biting her lip, Lena shakes her head, effectively ruining all the headway she had made with her hair. "I want to, believe me baby I do." I'm on my knees, hands in my naked lap, at the edge of the bed, with my insanely beautiful girlfriend leaning over me. I'm almost embarrassed by how turned on I am as she watches me with almost predatory eyes.

Her purple nails cup my cheek and bring her red lips to mine for a smooth languid kiss. It makes me light headed, the feeling of her tongue on mine, and I feel an overwhelming sense of loss when she pulls back for air.

"I really want to stay baby, but Jess texted me and apparently there's a problem at the company. something related to my mother I'm sure. But I should be done early tonight; we can go somewhere nice for dinner?"

"I'd love that." I smile up at my girlfriend but inside my mind is racing. Rao, I hope the problem has nothing to do with whatever was on the note that Lillian managed to send. I guess this is for the best though, I should be getting to the DEO to see if I can help with the Cadmus situation anyway.

Lena puts on her clothes from yesterday, somehow making it look graceful. I zip the back of her dress for her, fingers lingering on cool, soft skin as I kiss the back of her neck. "Have a great day baby."

"You too love. I'll see you tonight."

Lena walks out of my apartment in her crazy high heels, with her shoulders back and her head held high. There goes my baby, off to conquer the world. I chuckle to myself, thinking that the tabloids must be right, we really are the next power couple.

Smiling to myself, I try to think only happy thoughts I get ready for my day. The yellow sun beams through the windows as I draw the curtains back and soak up the rays. A fresh wave of energy rolls through me with the sunshine but as my mind wanders back to Lillian's note worry chips away at my mind.

My cellphone starts to buzz, saving me from my thoughts, and I dig through the tangled mess of sheets to find it. However, when I finally find it I realize that the tone is coming from a different phone, the one with the pink case that J'onn gave us for Super related emergencies.

"Maggie?" It's her name that flashes across the screen and my voice trembles as I answer.

"Hello Supergirl." Not Maggie! "Or should I call you, Kara Danvers." The dark laughter of the voice on the other end of the line makes my blood run cold. My heart is seized in a grip of fear and I find myself gripping the phone so tightly I have to stop myself from actually breaking it. "You know, when I asked what you are to my daughter I had no idea that you would take things so far."

"How did you get this phone?" My voice sounds like steel and my body is practically vibrating with a mixture of fear and rage.

"Oh don't worry dear, the feisty little detective of yours is only unconscious."

"How did you get this phone?!"

"It was too easy really. You'd be amazed what money can buy in this world. A few million here, a couple thousand there, and voila the car that is transporting me to the DEO holding cell is lined with my own men and your silly little detective, while your sister and that annoying green Martian are off handling my Cyborg Superman with no way to contact you."

"You're a monster!" The words rip from my throat violently, tears stinging angrily at my eyes.

"You really shouldn't talk to your potential mother in law like that. But don't worry Supergirl, there's not TOO much blood. I am a doctor after all, wouldn't want to kill her before the fun really starts."

"If you fucking hurt her I'll-"

"You'll what, make me regret it?" Lillian cackles and it makes a fresh wave of anger surge inside me. "I doubt that. But still, I'm less interested in your sister's play thing and more interested in your actual sister. She's currently engaged with henchmen but who knows how long she can last? Wouldn't it be a shame if something we're to happen to her or your precious mother and father?"

"If you hurt any of them I will DESTROY you. That is a promise!"

Instead of sounding even mildly phased, the Luthor matriarch just sighs. "Now does that threat extend to my daughter as well, because if it does than we may have a slight problem?"

"What did you do to her?!" It feels like my insides are boiling from pure rage, making my chest burn and my vision go red. 

"Nothing yet, unless you count the years of emotional abuse. My dear daughter has a far more important roll to play this time, assuming she listens to my note carefully, and if she doesn't than I'll have no choice but to end her the same way I'm going to end you."

"You'll never get away with this! I'm coming for you Lillian Lu-"

An explosion in the background, not of the phone call but from somewhere in the heart of the city, rings loudly in my sensitive ears. All I can picture is my sister and J'onn being in the center of that explosion and adrenaline begins to course through my veins. I'm in my suit and up in the air before the cell phone even hits the floor. As the cold blue sky hits my skin, I realize for the first time today, it's snowing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed chapter 15 out of who-the-fuck-knows?? Every time I say "okay, only two or three more chapters" I get another idea for how to get from where I am to where I want to be and suddenly I've added another and it's just like oh well. Anyways, I hope you guys are enjoying the ride as much as I am! Write the fic you would want to read, right?


	16. Futures in Jeopardy

My fist trembles in front of me as I rocket through the cold December air. The blue grey sky seems to split as I soar right through it, faster than I've ever flown before. I'm burning up from anger and speed and fear, and snowflakes are evaporating before they even touch my heated skin.

The explosion still rings loudly in my ears, mixing with the pounding of blood through my heart to create a deafening boom. My lip begins to quiver as I picture my sister and J'onn possibly at the center of that massive sound, but as bright red and yellow spring up in the distance a blanket of concentration settles over me.

I can do this! Saving people is what I do best, I just need to focus. So I let my carefully constructed walls completely disintegrate and the true strength of my powers rush out like a flood. The headache later will be brutal but it'll be worth it.

I'm suddenly acutely aware of each individual snowflake, every microscopic pattern of ice that forms them as they pour from clouds onto grey pavement. Every whisper of wind as it moves each strand of my golden hair is now obvious to me, and for a moment every single heart in the city beats together like a giant, collective drum.

The buildings are practically transparent as I zip by them in a fraction of a second. The people inside them look like nothing more than little specs of light, but I'm looking for one spec brighter than the rest.

My eyes sweep towards the fire that I'm rapidly approaching. I see the flames as only faint glows of reds and oranges, and the smoke is only a thin veil of grey in my eyes.

There! I spot the brightest light and quickly bring her into focus, like a scientist adjusting a microscope. Bright red is streaked down her cheek from a nasty cut on her forehead and as she staggers to her feet, I notice a wobble and unnatural tilt to her shoulder. But shes alive! Thank Rao!

Some of the others around her aren't as lucky. Agents are crumbled to the floor, some from fatal injuries and some from the black smoke coating their lungs. The wood from the old beams of the warehouse splinter as flames lick up their sides. One is seconds away from collapsing!

With an extra boost of speed I didn't even know I had in me, I surge forward, managing to grab the man by his collar and lift him to safety. As quickly as possible, I gather up the rest of the injured and dead team members, depositing them safely outside while Alex and J'onn manage to hold off the unrelenting Cyborg Superman.

My sister's slightly clouded eyes try to follow the blur of my cape and a small smile of relief turns the corners of her lip up. "Supergirl!"

My senses are still turned up to full power and the small cry from my sister is amplified to a painful shriek, but happiness fills my chest anyway. I'm not too late!

A shiver runs up my spine and I duck just in time to narrowly avoid a metal box being thrown directly at me. Arching mid-air, I do a 180 and dive towards Cyborg Superman.

The glow from his blue eye is like a target for me and I'm locked in! My fist connects with it, feeling the satisfying crack of metal against my knuckles. I feel a forceful rush of wind as his body is blasted back into the far wall of the warehouse.

In the haze of smoke, a green flash chases after the assailant. J'onn swings a broken beam as if it were a baseball bat, connecting perfectly with his look-alike's jaw. But once the cyborg's head snaps back, he's practically vibrating with renewed anger. He rips the beam from J'onn's grasp, hitting him square in the gut.

"J'onn!" Alex screams as the man we'vs both come to view as a father gets launched straight through the building, leaving a gaping hole in the wood and cement.

Bright red laser bullets are fired with deadly precision from the barrel of my sister's gun. Each hit thrusts Cyborg Superman back but not enough to stop him. Alex grits her teeth against the pain radiating from her shoulder and forehead but I can see her step faltering.

"Get out of here Alex!" Cyborg Superman continues his stride towards us, only mildly hindered by the bullets.

"I'm not leaving you!"

"Yes you are! I can't worry about your safety and fight him at the same time!" Alex looks at me with a wounded expression. I know it was harsh but, that's what its going to take to get through to her. "Please!"

Her hard stare softens and, reluctantly, my sister nods her agreement. "One, two... Three!"

Alex stops her barrage of bullets and runs on shaking legs towards the hole J'onn left. Pushing off the ground with all my might, I charge and smash into my target. We move in a flurry of kicks and punches, his feeling like nothing more than a slap in my heightened state.

Up and up I carry us. Cyborg Superman struggles against my grip to no avail. With a battle cry that would make the amazons proud, I hurtle his half flesh- half metal body to the burning earth.

Rocks shatter and split at his landing, curling up in an attempt to swallow him whole. Dust and smoke rise in a cloud and I zoom down to make sure my enemy stays right where I want him. But as the dust clears and my vision adjusts, the crater he was in only moments ago is empty. Cyborg Superman has vanished without a trace!

Frustration and a fresh wave of rage bubble in my chest until I can't breathe. I slam my fist into the ground where his head should be and an oddly satisfying jolt of pain shoots up my arm, bringing my mind back to the present.

Heat from the fire still burns at my back, so I lift off and fly through the falling snow, using my frost breath to kill the flames. The reinforcements my sister must have called for have arrived and are getting the injured and fallen into medical vans.

J'onn has reverted into his human form and is sprawled out on a stretcher. But I can see the steady rise and fall of his chest and that provides some comfort. I breathe a small sigh of relief.

I land next to my sister softly, boots crunching the freshly fallen snow. "Are you okay, Alex?" Gently, I touch the edge of the gash above her eyebrow, trying to wipe away the blood. She winces and jerks back in pain. "Shit, sorry! You need to get that looked at."

Alex shakes her head stubbornly and casts her gaze to the charred earth. "They have her, Kara. Lillian took Maggie." Her rough hands are clenched into fists and her teeth grind together in anger.

"We'll get her back." I rub my hand down her back in attempt to sooth her, but Alex looks at me with ice in her eyes.

She holds up her disposable phone with the blue case and I understand why. Its a picture, sent from Maggie's burner, of the detective on the floor of an armored car with a small pool of blood surrounding her dark hair. Her hands are tied behind her back with her own cuffs and a strip of white cloth gags her mouth.

I can't help but gasp at the image. Alex lets out an almost inaudible whimper. "We were on our way to help her when Cyborg Superman ambushed us. I called you..." my sister's strong voice cracks and my heart breaks. "We called you. Where were you?"

"I was at home... at home with Lena. But I swear the phone never rang, the transmitter never went off! I swear Alex, I wasn't ignoring you. You know I would have been here in a second if I knew! Lillian contacted me too, its the only reason I got here in time."

My heart beats wildly in my chest from a mixture of guilt and desperation to make her understand. I wish I could have been here and I feel absolutely terrible that I wasn't.

Thankfully, the cold glaze in Alex's eyes slowly melts as she takes me in, and only determination with a touch of sadness is left. "I know Kara." Alex hops off her stretcher with only a slight misstep. "They must have jammed all our signals." She cracks her knuckles loudly. "Lets get back to base, regroup, and then go get my girl!"

I nod in agreement, heart still reeling. "Where do you think they're taking her?"

"I have no idea." Alex replies with a short breath. "We'll get Winn on it."

My sister puts on a brave face as the last of the other agents are gathered into vans. She gives a quick wave, shoulders tensed and jaw locked as she gets in behind them. I want to ride with her, to be in the comforting presence of my big sister, but I know that she processes things differently from me. While I need contact she needs space, and this is about her right now so I have to respect that.

I couldn't imagine how I would react if it was Lena who was taken. I probably would have blasted a hole through this city by now trying to get her back, and I admire Alex for her ability to stay logical and focused, but I know at some point the other shoe will drop.

The engines of the DEO vehicles rev to life, leaving me alone with my thoughts as I fly. The December air is crisp and helps to calm the headache pounding behind my eyes from using my powers so intensely before, but it still stings painfully. For a moment, I have to close my eyes in an attempt to stave it off. Conveniently, in that same moment, the DEO transmitters come back on line.

"Kara, can you hear me? Winn fixed the signal." My sister's voice is a shock, a very loud shock, and I narrowly avoid crashing into a building because of it.

"Yeah Alex, I'm here." I readjust the earpiece and steady my flying.

"Well, we just got back to headquarters. J'onn is recovering well and the agents who made it out alive are expected to make a full recovery."

"Thank Rao!" I say with a sigh of relief.

"And Winn is trying to trace Maggie's phone, possibly get a lock on where they've taken her..." The small hitch in my sister's voice makes my heart skip a beat and an uneasy feeling settle in the pit of my stomach. "Have you heard from Lena recently?"

"Not since this morning, why?"

"Because she's on the news..." The way Alex says it, voice filled with apprehension and the slightest tremble of anger, I know what she's implying.

"No! There's no way she'd say anything! There's no way, Alex. She doesn't even know, not for sure anyway..."

"The public did just find out that her mother escaped from custody, so hopefully it's only about that. It'll be outside L Corp and it starts in a few minutes."

"Okay, well I'll be right back to the DEO and we can watch it together."

"You have to be there!" At first my sister's voice is not asking, it's a command, but she wavers slightly making me pause. "What if she knows something about Maggie..."

"Alex-" I trust Lena, I truly do, but what if it is something Cadmus related? Didn't Lillian say that Lena had another roll to play? "Fine, I'll keep my distance and stay out of sight."

"Thank you, Kara."

"We're going to find her Alex, I promise." And with that, I hear the soft click of my sister disconnecting her side of the transmitter.

My skin itches uncomfortably and a tingle settles in my spine as I land atop a tall building across from my girlfriend's company. I lean over, looking for her in the crowd, and accidentally grip the metal railing so hard that it bends under the pressure of my fingertips. Flashing cameras and scribbling notepads distract my hearing as I search for the signature murmur of Lena's beautiful heart. Finally, among hundreds of clicking pens and anxious breathes, I spot her.

She looks beautiful, as always, and slightly intimidating. Her long hair is pulled back in a tight bun and she holds her chin high as she approaches the podium. Her dark purple nails tap against the glass and her high heeled feet bounce against the cement in a display of very uncharacteristic nerves. Something is wrong... I inadvertently grip the railing even tighter, until the metal completely splinters, eyes moving away from Lena to scan the crowd for any sign of Lillian.

"It is no secret that I'm a Luthor, and it is no secret what we are capable of..."

The crowd of reporters and concerned citizens falls completely silent. They have their eyes glued on the CEO with unwavering focus and I can hear Lena's heart skip a beat because of it. She grips the podium tighter as if for support as she straightens her back and sweeps her eyes over the audience.

"I know there has been a considerable amount of speculation that I am in some way involved with the rest of my family's transgressions, despite their many attempts on my life and lively-hood. As you are all aware by now, my mother has escaped from police custody, and though she is extremely dangerous to the alien populations of this city, I called this press conference today to assure the public that they have nothing to fear from L Corp and especially nothing to fear from me."

I release a breath I didn't even know I was holding.

Her green eyes pierce the cameras with fierce determination and I can't help but feel like this is a direct message to her mother. A final act of defiance. "And if you are watching this, mother." She spits the word out like it's poison. "Know that I will never, ever help you, no matter what you threaten me with. Supergirl will stop you!"

My ear piece crackles to life, and the low rumbling sends a chill down my spine. This isn't the DEO frequency... "She had her chance. Time to move!"

Before I can put the pieces together, from somewhere deep in the mass of the crowd, a voice yells through the quiet. "Is it true that your girlfriend is an alien?"

My feet are off the roof before my brain has time to catch up. I hear the clink of bullets in the barrel of a gun and watch in horror as a red dot appears on my girlfriends chest, covering the same patch of cream colored skin that I kissed only the night before. Horrified gasps erupt from the viewers, but in their panicked state no body moves.

There, in the stained grey hoodie and black jeans is Mikey Donovon. The same man responsible for helping Lillian before! Anger flares in my chest at the sight of him. A crooked, deranged smile covers his face as he waves a gun in the air, firing off a few rounds into the blue sky and light flurrying of snow.

Lena just grits her teeth and narrows her forest green eyes. She stands her ground, hands clenched into shaking fists. Before she can say anything, three more thugs emerge from the crowd and one screams, "Tell the public or we will, that was the deal!"

"Your girlfriend is Su-"

The cameras only see a flash of red and blue, but I see every minute of my future flash in front of me. A future that I may not get to have if he gives away my identity. I see CatCo and Miss Grant, smiling at an award I won for an article, proud of what I've accomplished. I see my sister and Maggie in front of a judge, declaring their love for each other, and me standing there with my glasses on and flowers in my hand as the maid of honor. I see a Christmas tree, with beautiful sparkling ornaments and more presents than I can count, and two little brunette children putting cookies by the burning fire place. I see Lena, waiting for me under the mistletoe... Mostly, I see Lena.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trust me guys. Just trust me. And as always, thank you for reading!


	17. Super, Danvers, Zor-El

Every minute that I'm Supergirl I'm doing calculations. I need to constantly be aware of my surroundings because even the slightest change in detail can alter events dramatically.

I'm always mindful of how fast I'm flying in relation to the direction of the wind, air pressure, and calculating precisely how much energy I'm putting behind my fingertips. It's the difference between catching a falling building or going right through it, punching an enemy or decapitating them.

Right now, my mind is so full of panic and anger and pure survival instinct that I may have miscalculated this one by just a tiny bit... To be more accurate, it's more like several miles...

I only meant to pick him up, stop him before he could fully reveal my true identity, instead Mikey Donovon is now soaring through the clouds above National City! He is a barely visible black spec among the falling snowflakes. The humans probably can't see him at all! One more ounce of strength and poor Mikey would be orbiting the moon by now. I can't find it in myself to feel bad about it.

Catching his discarded gun, I snap the cool metal over my knee like it's nothing more than a twig. The harsh crushing sound is followed by the screams of civilians. Three red bulls-eyes are trained at the family crest on my chest from the remaining Cadmus thugs. Considering it was probably Lillian Luthor who armed them, who knows what they're loaded with? I need to get this taken care of fast!

Checking the still ascending trajectory of Mikey, I calculate that he should have about 45 seconds before hitting the earth again. Perfect, that should be more than enough time!

I press my earpiece to life and talk urgently. "Alex, J'onn, Winn is anybody there?"

Heat leaves my once blue eyes, making the air around me crackle with it's electricity. "Is everything okay, Kara?" Winn's panicked voice fills my ears as I blast one of the thug's weapons with my heat vision, super heating the metal until he screams from the fresh burns on his hands.

"No! I need you to get J'onn for me!"

"He's still in recovery. Can I help? Should I get Alex?"

I have to pause the conversation as I rush forward, sweeping the legs out of my second opponent before he can fire a single round. His heavy body hits the pavement with a loud thud, bright red blood spilling onto the snow from the back of his head.

I try to x-ray vision through the last man's gun to see what the bullets are made of, but the machine is made of lead. "No, it has to be J'onn! Unless you have shape-shifting abilities that I don't know about."

Quickly I glance up, almost having forgotten my falling enemy. Less than 10 seconds! I'm too far away from the last man for a direct attack, so I think quickly and blast him with my freeze breath. His lips quickly turn pale blue and the gun falls from his frozen fingers.

"Tell J'onn this is a level 10 emergency!" I push off the earth forcefully, boots leaving two little craters in the concrete. "Tell him to meet me outside of L Corp in less than 3 minutes, bring a small team." Three minutes, that should enough time for him to get here while I distract the public before they get too suspicious. "If he doesn't, Kara Danvers could die! He'll know what I mean."

"Shit, shit fuck okay he'll be right there! Just hold on!"

Mere inches from the roof of a building, I catch Mikey Donovon before his soft human body can splatter onto the metal planks. His skin is ghostly white and his body is limp in my arms, but his chest rises and falls with shallow breaths. Good, I need him alive so he can tell me where Maggie is.

I float back to the ground, taking a few extra seconds to absorb the scene before me. The good detectives of NCPD have managed to calm the crowd to some extent, gathering up the thugs and loading them into the police cars. Lena's security team is trying to herd her off the stage, but my girlfriend shakes herself free from their grasp and forces herself back towards the podium.

I can see the long, straight strands of her dark hair that have broken free from her bun dancing around her cheeks. Traveling slowly down those same perfectly sculpted cheeks are hot, angry tears. The strong, powerful, confident Lena Luthor has never let the public see her like this, but she isn't looking at the hundred people in front of her, she's only looking at me.

The gaze from her green eyes is like kryptonite and I shrink before it. So much fear and pain is being reflected at me and I don't know what to think. Her purple nails dig into the palms of her hands, making little crescent moon indents on her skin and on my heart. Her typically strong shoulders are shaking as the tears continue to fall and I just want to wrap her in my arms, but set of her jaw makes me think she would push me away...

Shaking my head, I force my gaze away from Lena and back on the chaos. Where is J'onn? I scan the crowd for square rimmed glasses but come up empty. Time to stall!

"Here you go boys. I'll be right back for them." I deposit the still unconscious Mikey with the police officers, but still suspicious of the guns, I avoid touching them.

As I float towards the stage where Lena is waiting for me, I feel the burning gaze of reporters and concerned citizens on my red flowing cape. Some are watching me with amazement and wonder but most of them are scared and suspicious, two emotions I never wanted to see directed at Supergirl.

By the time my boots land gently on the steps, I still don't see J'onn in the crowd. Cameras flash as I ascend the rest of the stairs, the bright lights making my pounding headache that much worse. As I pass my girlfriend, all I want is to kiss her, to tell her that everything is going to be alright and that I am so sorry for all of this, but the eyes of the nation are on us and if J'onn comes through than the games not over just yet.

Ignoring the tugging in my heart and the hurt expression in her eyes, I reach out subtlety and tug the sleeve of her jacket, fingers just barely ghosting over the pounding pulse point of her wrist. My girlfriend shivers at the touch and closes her eyes before turning her head away from me. With slumped shoulders, I continue past her to the podium.

Its smooth metal is cold under my fingers as I grip the sides, muscles trembling. A hush has fallen over the crowd and they all look up at me with wide, expectant eyes.

"People of National City..." I can't help but glance back at Lena before continuing. She's biting her lip, arms crossed protectively over her chest. Whatever happens, I have to protect her...

"People of National City, it's true! I do have a normal life outside of being a Supergirl! I have a normal job with a mean boss and a crappy salary. I have regular clothes that aren't red and blue and I like fuzzy pajamas. I have a mother and a father and a sister and friends and I love them all so dearly. I am dating someone, and I love them more than the sun. But no matter what is going on in my day to day life, National City, I will never ever stop fighting for you!"

The crowd is completely silent, for humans anyway, as everyone sits on the edge of their seats. But I hear all of their hearts beating as one, the buzz of their phones even on silent and the rustle of fabric in the breeze. My vision is almost blurry because of the sensory overload and sick feeling in my stomach.

"Every day I put aside my 'human' life and fight for you, for your families, your homes, your children. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you! There are only a handful of people I know on this whole planet who would do the same, and one of them is Lena Luthor. She fights for you every day, same as I do, and she deserves recognition for that, or at the very minimum your trust."

Lena eyes are still swimming with tears as I look back at her pointedly. "I do." Her red lips quiver and she looks down at her feet to hide the myriad of emotions playing across her beautiful face. "I trust her with my life."

"Supergirl, by the police tape on your left." a gruff voice whispers in my ear. Thank Rao!

"You have my word, I will find Lillian Luthor and bring her to justice. I will fight hard every single day for this incredible city, and I will live my normal life in the time when you don't need me. But during that normal life, my identity is NOT Kara Danvers!"

My hand shakes slightly as I raise it, finger pointing to the police tape at my left. The crowd gasps as they follow my finger and find something they definitely were not expecting. There I am! Kara Danvers, complete with glasses, ponytail, a pink winter coat, and her reporting recorder. Kara gives a tentative wave, but I notice a slight wince as she moves and quickly direct the attention back to me. J'onn won't be able to hold the form for long...

"As you can clearly see, she is right there doing her job. So please, leave her and Lena Luthor alone about it."

I step back from the podium, knees wobbling slightly, and the chaos starts again. Reporters and news stations jump up, holding out microphones and screaming questions. "Who are you really, Supergirl!" "What are you going to do to protect us from Cadmus?" "Who are you dating?"

The lights and noises and strain from pushing my powers is all catching up to me. I stagger back, trying to look as professional and put together as possible. This city needs a hero, and I'll be damned if I let them see me weak. So I take a deep breath, grit my teeth, and pick one thing to focus on. In the background I see Kara/J'onn disappear, probably heading back to the DEO, and the small team Winn sent taking over from the local police, but my mind automatically latches on to Lena.

It's like she's frozen, green eyes stuck staring between where "Kara" just was and where I am now. Her defined jaw is hanging open slightly in shock and her arms are gripping herself even tighter. When she notices my desperate gaze on her, she seems to snap out of it. The proper business woman persona falls back into place effortlessly, with the kind of ease that only comes from years or practice.

Lena's stands straight, shoulders back and chin up as she approaches the podium. Her aura of authority is back in full force and no one would guess she'd been crying only moments ago.

"No more questions. That's the end of this press conference." Her low voice is firm, leaving no room for debate, and her arms are strong as they circle my waist.

I hear nothing but the murmur of her heart as she leads me away from the bustling crowd and into the relative quiet of her building. She guides me into the elevator and up to her office. The familiar environment is comforting and the smell that fills the office is uniquely Lena, making my senses start to ease.

Lena's fingers are shaking as she sits me down on the couch, but instead of sitting beside me like I want her to, she takes several steps back and crosses her arms again. Her heels click on the tile as she paces back and forth, biting her lip between her teeth and focusing her gaze on her bracelet.

"How did you do it?" My girlfriend's voice cracks and she stops her pacing, business woman persona gone. The Lena before me is vulnerable and small and angry and I am so, so sorry.

"What are you talking about, Lena?"

"You know what I mean, Supergirl." She spits out my name, letting it land heavily between us.

"Lena I..." I don't know what to say. There's nothing I can say that would ease the pain burning in her chest right now. So I let my jaw close, air crackling between us, and go to adjust glasses that aren't even there.

Lena digs through the pocket of her jacket, brows furrowed in what seems like frustration. She finally pulls out a crumpled piece of paper and throws it at my chest. I let it hit me, that's what she wants, and it bounces onto the white fabric of the couch before I pick it up.

As I unfold it and start to read, Lena turns her back to me and I see her shoulders shaking as she starts to cry again. It breaks my heart! My heart breaks again as I read the letter: "She's not who she says she is. Don't be fooled, no one could love you. Tell the world or I will!" Lillian...

Rage bubbles up in my chest but it's eclipsed by the heavy weight of guilt. "Lena... I didn't want you to find out like this. I am so sorry." I speak softly, sincerely. The pounding in my head has lessened now and has been replaced with an ache in my chest that is arguably far worse.

Lena doesn't speak for what feels like an eternity. She wipes angrily at her forest green eyes to stop the tears and shakes her head. "It's not that, Kara..."

"No, I should have told you! I wanted to, believe me I really did! I have since that night in your apartment, but I promised I wouldn't until everything with your mom and the press settled down, it was too risky, but now here we are and everything's a mess anyway." I'm up off the couch before my brain can catch up to my body. My heart slams against my ribs and my palms sweat so much they're actually cold. "Lena, you are the best thing in my life. I just, I just wanted to protect you and I thought this was the best way to keep you safe."

"I know a thing or two about secrets... I am a Luthor after all."

A wave of realization washes over me and I whisper, "You called the press conference to protect me..." Biting her lip, Lena's face twists up as she tries to contain a sob and she just nods.

I fall to my knees with a loud thud that reverberates around the office. "Please Lena." My hands grip hers, intertwining our fingers as I hold them close to me. "You have to know how much I care about you, how fucking special you are." I kiss her knuckles, breathing in the scent of her. "You deserve the whole truth Lena Luthor, you deserve someone will stand beside you and be totally honest. Please, let me prove to you that I can be that person."

The mighty Luthor crumples. She collapses onto the floor of her office beside me, chest heaving and eyes glazed. I'm expecting a slap or silence or yelling but my girlfriend surprises me, she throws herself forward and wraps me in her arms. Overcome with relief, I melt into her, feeling her body shaking through my super suit. She feels warm and soft and like home.

"Kara, I understand why you didn't tell me. You are more important than any one person, you're the savior of this city, everyone's hero, MY hero... I just, when I got that note from my mother I thought that maybe you didn't tell me because "No one could ever love a Luthor" and I will never be able to escape that part of me."

I pull back, still holding her close though, as I smile from ear to ear. I just can't help myself. Only Lena, would think something that is completely my fault is because of her. "I'm Supergirl for Rao's sake, I can do anything! And I love you Lena Luthor, I love you so damn much."

Her soft giggle cures all my pain, it fills my heart with happiness and makes my sky bright with sunshine once more.

"I love you too Kara Danvers."

"Zor-El. My real name, the one I was born with is Kara Zor-El."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if there were some errors in this chapter, it's midnight and I really just wanted to post it as soon as I finished. I promise I'll go back tomorrow and fix them. Thank you so much though for all of the hits, kudos, and comments! Every time I get a notification that I got another comment my whole day gets better. I hope you guys are enjoying reading this as much as I'm enjoying writing it!


	18. Joining The Super Team

It's strange not to have my cape flowing behind me as I fly. Normally the near indestructible fabric slaps against the back of my calves and ankles as I soar through the air. I almost miss the familiar feeling of it as it gets tossed around in the wild vortex of wind flying creates, but then I look down at the shivering bundle in my arms and think: no, this is way better!

The soft wool of her hat tickles my chin and the cute little strands of dark hair peeking out from it blow around my cheeks. Her hands are locked around my neck so tightly that Superman probably couldn't even pry them apart. Tucked between her two trembling thumbs is the corner of my cape, bright red in stark contrast to her pale white fingers, as she holds it close for equal parts protection and warmth.

The December air is even colder up here, hundreds of feet above the ground, and though Lena is bundled in her adorable mittens, jacket, and hat I can still feel every cell in her body shivering against the cold. "Are we almost there?" Lena manages to whisper through chattering teeth.

"Almost, love." I reply with a chuckle, kissing the top of her hat covered head. I'm reluctant to fly too fast, I don't want to scare her even more, and I have to stay at least somewhat close to the buildings so that she really doesn't freeze from the temperatures of increasing altitude.

I hold Lena close as I drop slightly lower in the sky to round a corner, making Lena gasp and squeeze my neck even harder. "How do you do this all the time?!"

"Oh come on, it's fun!" Lena just grits her teeth. "The mighty Lena Luthor, afraid of heights, who would have guessed?" I tease my girlfriend but hold her closer so that she feels safe.

I'm carrying her bridal style through clouds of falling snow. It was the easiest way out of L Corp, with reporters still loitering around the garage and front exit, waiting for a comment from the shaken superhero. Plus, I've secretly been dreaming about doing this since we met! "Ya know, maybe if you opened your eyes it wouldn't be so bad?"

Lena takes a sharp breath of air and lifts her head up, never one to back down from a challenge. For just one second her beautiful forest green eyes pop open. I feel her stiffen against me almost instantly, but her mouth hangs open in wonder as she takes in the incredible sight of the city sprawling before us.

The snow drifts down almost lazily, in no hurry to get to the waiting earth below, and Lena sticks her tongue out to catch a falling snowflake. Once one lands on her pink tongue, she quickly darts it back into her warm mouth and squeezes her eyes shut tight again. I'm proud of her for lasting that long.

Resting her head on my chest, Lena sighs softly. "I guess there are worse ways to travel."

I giggle at her response and kiss the top of her head again. My heart swells with love as my lips press to the soft, though slightly scratchy fabric, of her hat. I can't believe after everything today, that this incredible woman loves me!

For a brief moment I forget that I'm a Superhero. I forget everybody who is relying on me, I forget Cadmus, and Lillian, and that terrible photo of Maggie bleeding in chains. I forget everything other than the wind on my face and that I get the honor of being Lena Luthor's girlfriend, and it feels wonderful! But then I see the DEO building looming up ahead and I crash back into our present reality. Determination burns in my chest again and I speed up to get there faster. There are people counting on me, Maggie is in danger, and I won't rest until Lillian is behind bars again!

Lena lets out a little yelp at the sudden movement and clutches onto my cape even tighter. But I land so smoothly that she doesn't even feel it, she just keeps her eyes shut tight and my cape clenched in her hands. It's adorable really.

"Um Lena, you can let go now?" I'm still holding her bridal style, which don't get me wrong is fine by me, but I'm anxious for her to get inside and officially meet everyone. Then we can really get to work.

Slowly, she cracks one eye open. Once she sees that we're safely on the solid roof, she climbs off my body, cheeks blushing bright red. "Sorry..."

Laughing lightly, I shake my head. "Maybe we can do that again, when there's not some sort of life or death situation going on and you have your eyes open for more than 0.2 seconds?"

"Maybe... Only if you buy me dinner after."

"That sounds like a win-win for me!"

Lena takes her gloves off, shoves them into her jacket pocket and laces our fingers together. Hers are chilly in my warm ones and the touch of her soft skin is comforting. I'm grateful we had that brief moment of happiness mixed in to what has been a kind of shit day. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Part of my job description is uncertainty if I'll even get a tomorrow...

"Okay." I say firmly, shaking the negative thoughts from my usually sunshiny mind. "Lena Luthor, welcome to the DEO!"

Guiding her through the door from the roof to the control room, I feel Lena tense beside me. She's nervous, I can tell by the little skip in her heart beat and hitch in her breathing. Her pupils are wide as she surveys the room, quickly analyzing the machinery. I can see the gears of her beautiful mind turning on overdrive.

"It's a lot to take in, I know. But here are the basics: The Department of Extra-Normal Operations was stared to hunt down and contain dangerous aliens who threatened the human population of earth. They kind of got side tracked and took on that 'all aliens are the enemy' approach for a while there without trying to understand first, but with J'onn Jonzz as director everything has been going really well."

We're through the control room and into the more nitty gritty of the department now. Various interrogation rooms and containment chambers line corridor that we walk down. I can tell that Lena wants to stop and fully examine each one, scientific mind eating up all the new technology and information.

"J'onn came to the press conference as me today to save Kara Danvers. He's a shape-shifter. Well technically, he's a green Martian, the last of his kind, but he has the ability to take on the form of others. He chooses to live his life looking like Hank Henshaw, who's now working as one of your mother's murderous science experiments. He attacked J'onn and Alex today, I almost didn't get there in time..."

Lena flinches at the mention of her mother and bites her lip. She casts her gaze to the ground as I continue quickly. "But he's okay! J'onn is kind of like a father to me and Alex; he can be harsh at times but he's really all mush once you get to know him. I actually think you and him are going to get along." Lena swallows uncertainly. I mean it though, I really think they'll like each other, after a fairly long adjustment period that is.

"Alex is kind of the second on command. She has a medical and bio-engineering background plus tons of combat experience, so she bridges the gap between action and science a lot of the time. But I don't know how they're planning on handing this since it's Maggie who's in danger, they may have had Vasquez take point-"

"Wait, what? Maggie is in danger?"

We pause just outside the doors to headquarters, my fingers lingering on the shining metal of the handle. Lena looks at me with panic in her green eyes and my stomach starts to feel sick all over again. "Well um, you know how the news reported that Lillian managed to escape while being transferred to a more secure facility and that she took a cop with her? Well that facility is here and that cop is Maggie."

Lena's hand moves up to cover her red lips, fingers shaking and heart racing. "Oh my god... I'm so sorry." Her voice cracks and a fresh round of tears threatens to spill out. I know she must be feeling like she's responsible for this in some way, but she isn't and I need to let her know that.

But before I can say anything, the door flies open and there is my sister, clad in full combat gear and brown eyes blazing. "What are you doing here?!" Alex's gun is out of it's holster in seconds and pointed directly at Lena, not even inches from the smooth skin of her chest.

I fling my arm in front of my girlfriend, shoving her behind me so I can step between the bullet, and raise my hands up in the air. "Woah, woah Alex it's okay! She's with me! I'm here!" My sister grits her teeth, not dropping the weapon until I forcefully push her hand away. "I said, she's with me."

Reluctantly, Alex re-holsters her gun and her shoulders slump. She bites her lip and looks away, unwilling to let the Luthor see her vulnerable in any way. "I don't want her here, Kara. It's not safe." My sister's voice is gravely and it tares at my heart, making my soul itself aches for her.

I wrap my strong arms around my even stronger sister, burying my face into the crook of her neck. "It's going to be okay, Alex. She knows now, my secret is out, and she can help us get Maggie." I hate seeing her like this. She deserves to be happy for once! "I promise, we're going to get her back."

Alex relaxes into my embrace for a moment and then takes a deep breath. She steels herself, forcing her emotions out of her heart and to the back of her mind. When she turns to face us her expression is carefully neutral but her hands are balled into fists at her sides. "You really want to help us?"

Lena nods eagerly, practically jumping up on the tips of her toes. She wrings her hands together, cracking her knuckles in anticipation. I know what this means to her, a chance for redemption in her eyes. If only she could understand that, in my eyes, she's already a hero. As far as I'm concerned, my sister and Lena are just as much superheros as I am, maybe even more.

"Good." J'onn's firm, booming voice echoes across headquarts. He walks over to us with a slight limb and rather large bandage wrapped around his side. The Martian goes to clap Lena's shoulder, and I see her flinch slightly before his hand makes soft contact and she relaxes. "We need all the brilliant minds working on this we can get."

Beaming, Lena grins, but her face falls as she seems to remember something. "I'm happy to help, but something has been bothering me, maybe you already figured out an answer? Those guns three of my mother's goons had, they didn't look like normal human weapons. Are we dealing with more alien technology?"

"Good eye, Luthor-"

Lena quickly interrupts J'onn and I see a flash of desperation on her face. "Please, please just call me Lena."

Nodding in understanding, J'onn leads us to a small box in the center of the room. "You're right Lena, they weren't normal guns, but they weren't quite alien either."

Lena and I lean over the table to look through the top of the box. When I see the glowing red rocks inside my heart is gripped with fear. I fling myself back across the room with all of the strength and speed I can muster until my back slams into the solid wall, leaving a sizable dent. They're lucky I didn't go right through it!

My heart pounds against my ribs like it is trying to escape my body entirely and I frantically look between the box and my family. Confusion and a bit of fear are shining in my girlfriend's eyes as she moves to go after me, but J'onn gently holds her back.

"It's okay Supergirl, we designed this box so that the harmful radiation of the red kryptonite won't escape."

"Red kryptonite..." Lena says under breath, seeming to chew the words over.

"It's like a poison." I reply, voice still shaking. "It turns me into everything I hate!"

"Maxwell Lord invented it as a pseudo kryptonite. When Supergirl is under its influence she becomes the anti-thesis of everything she believes in. Every bad thought and dark desire she's ever had comes to the surface with rage and violence and it's almost impossible to stop her." Alex says with an almost frightened glimmer in her eyes. I'm still haunted by nightmares of what I said to her last time I was affected by redk. I was a monster!

Lena's eyes go wide as she looks at the box then back at me. "So if they had shot you with this during the press conference?"

"Supergirl would probably have killed many innocent people." Alex confirms, but it's like the words make a light bulb go off in Lena's brilliant mind and she's smiling from ear to ear. "You realize this is literally one of the worst possible situations right?"

"If my mother is willing to risk facing a violent, murder happy alien she must be desperate!" I see her brain working faster than she can talk. "And when she's desperate she makes mistakes. Kryptonite emits radiation, radiation leaves a trail, we can trace that trail!"

Winn jumps up from his desk, dorky smile on his face and determined look in his eye. "You bet we can!" Lena is next to him in seconds, the two of them pouring over codes on the computer screen that I can't even begin to understand. Still cautious of the red kryptonite in the room, I make my way slowly to them. "Okay, okay let me work my hacking wizarding magic and..." Winn hangs his head when a map pops up on his screen. "15 folks, we have 15 possible locations."

"We don't have the man power to send a team to 15 sites!"

"Maybe we don't have to." Lena types on the keyboard faster than even my eyes can follow. "Most of these places belong to Maxwell Lord so we can assume that is leftover radiation from his time developing it. But the other places, those are all Luthor properties..." She zeroes in on three of the locations. "Those are the most likely."

"I do have a picture..." Alex pulls out her phone. "Lillian was kind enough to send another."

The photo is mostly dark, all grey and menacing shadows, but in the center is Maggie. She's strapped to a chair, blood dripping down her face and dark hair plastered to her sweating skin. There's a needle in her arm leading to some sort of fluid bag, probably something to keep her sedated.

Lena takes the phone, holding it so close to her face that her nose almost touches the screen. "I know those curtains..." Her eyes narrow as she examines it further. "It's kind of blurry and out of focus but, remember how I told you Lex made me a doll for my first Christmas with the Luthors, and he stole the fabric for her dress from the curtains? Well, I can't be 100% certain, but I think those are the same ones."

"How sure are you?" J'onn can be rather intimidating when he talks like this, but Lena seems to be settling in to her element and hold her own

She points to a blinking red dot on the screen. "The curtains plus a positive for traces of red krytponite, this has to be where my mother is! It's our vacation home by the beach, just south of National City. It's by the water, very secluded, the kind of place that's perfect to escape to if you don't want to be found."

I'm so proud of Lena for figuring it out and my skin is itching to get a move on already! "Great, lets go!"

"You're not going!" All three of them say in unison, turning to each other with surprise and mild amusement.

Alex speaks first "It's too risky, Kara. Lillian is bound to have more redK bullets, and we can't worry about you getting exposed and saving Maggie at the same time."

"Your sister is right. Knowing my mother, you'd be walking right into a trap." Lena grips my hands, eyes practically pleading with me. "I can't lose you." Her voice is barely above a whisper and it sends shivers down my spine.

J'onn pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing heavily. His hand is rough on my shoulder as he pushes me back forcefully. I stumble for a few steps before catching myself. "Hey, what was that for?"

"Even for a Martian, pushing a Kryptonian is supposed to be like pushing a brick wall. Normally I wouldn't have been able to move you more than a fraction of an inch. You need rest, Kara." J'onn finishes gently and I start to realize they're right even though I wish they weren't. In a last ditch effort, I pull out the infamous Kara-puppy pout, but all I'm rewarded with is a sympathetic pat on the back. "You need to go recharge under the yellow sun lamps. And that's not a suggestion Supergirl, it's an order."

I'm about to protest but, as if on cue, my headache pounds against my skull sending a fresh wave of dizziness through me. Lena steadies me in her warm arms and looks at Alex and J'onn with concern. "Tell me where it is and I'll make sure she gets there."

"Straight down those stairs, past the medical bay, first door on the left." Replies Alex, looking just as concerned as Lena.

"Alex and Vasquez will lead the rescue mission. Considering who we're dealing with, no aliens are going. And remember, the primary goal is to get in, get Maggie, and get out. We can handle Lillian once Supergirl isn't so drained, but for tonight our focus is on keeping innocent people safe."

I wrap my sister in a tight hug, ignoring the bulk of armor between us. "If anyone can bring her back it's you. Good luck, sis." 

Alex smiles back softly but I can see the nerves and grit playing behind her chocolate brown eyes. "Thank you. Keep on your ear piece, we'll keep you updated."

We pull back and Lena wraps her arm around my waist again for support. Using my powers so much today has been difficult on my bulletproof body! The sun lamps actually don't sound too bad, but it's killing me that I can't go help Maggie!

"Come on baby, let's go get you patched up." Gently, Lena leads me out of headquarters, following the directions my sister gave her. As we're walking away, my super hearing picks up Winn explaining new gadgets and Alex going over strategy. I hear the pounding of combat boots on metal as the agents load into the truck, and the spin of the rubber tires as they pull away. Every cell in my body screams that I should be going with them and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, on edge.

"They're going to be okay, Kara." My girlfriend seats me on the bed, fiddling with the lamps and figuring them out surprisingly easily. 

"I hope so..." Once the yellow rays begin to soak into my sore muscles I finally start to relax. "Ahhh." I hum as I settle under the glow.

"See, you'll feel better in no time. And while they go rescue Maggie, you and I can work on a plan to stop my mother once and for all. I already have some ideas-"

I squeeze Lena's hand, heart skipping a beat at the contact. "Thank you for being you. It's so good to finally have you on the Super team."

"I was always team Super." Lena beams back at me. "There's no where else I'd rather be." I'm about to lean in and kiss her, my chapped lips are begging for it, but my little burner phone starts to buzz. "So the super suit has pockets?" Lena says with a chuckle, but my blood runs cold.

Sitting up on the edge of my seat, I stare at the screen with trembling fingers. Lena notices the change in me and becomes serious too. "Shit." I hiss under my breath. It's a text and photo from "Maggie's" cell.

The same blue, flowing curtains from the photo before frame the background of this one. But instead of just one person in the center, there are three...

The small phone tumbles out of my shaking hands and onto the tile floor with a thump that continues to ring in my ears. Lena chases after it, opening the photo to examine it and gasping in horror at what she finds. "Are they your...?"

My whole body starts to vibrate from rage as I nod. "That's Eliza and Jeremiah Danvers, my adoptive parents." I have to close my eyes to stop the fear and anger from consuming me. "Alex's mom and dad."

"Fuck!" Lena whispers in shock. She turns her eyes back to the phone and reads the text message portion in a hushed, quaking voice. "Congratulations on the little stunt you pulled this afternoon. As I'm sure you know by now, I hate playing games, so let me make this as clear as possible: You have half and hour to decided, the little team you sent won't be here until then. Your life in exchange for theirs."

Lena drops the phone, hands now gripping my shoulders so that my cape is balled up in her fists. "Kara, you can't possibly be considering going, can you?"

A single tear leaks down my cheek, leaving a wet trail before landing on the maroon sleeve of my girlfriend's jacket. "I have to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, not as exciting as the previous chapter but, I needed to set some stuff up for the next few and wanted to throw in a couple cute Lena and Kara moments. I hoped you liked it! P.S: If I could hug every single person who comments, I would!


	19. RedK Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So instead of posting one giant 5,000 word chapter, I decided to break this up into two smaller chapters that I think do a better job of telling the story and having it flow well.   
> Trigger warning for violence!!!

"No! Please Kara, no!" Lena's words bounce around my skull like ice in a mixer, and they burn as I swallow them. "We can figure it out together. There has to be another way!"

"There isn't." I feel my mouth opening and my tongue moving but all I'm really aware of is the pounding in her chest and the cries in her lungs.

"Please!" Her fingers grip my arm until they turn white against my unyielding skin. "Please baby..."

I may be a superhero, but I don't have the strength for this. Each desperate whimper and quiver of her lip chips away at my resolve until it crumbles completely. The expression that I had set like steel falls away, making way for a trickle of tears. My muscular shoulders fall forward and Lena breathes a sigh of relief, going to wrap me in her warm arms.

I want her to be right, I want there to be another answer, but sometimes the only solution is sacrifice and I would give my life a thousand times over if it meant protecting the ones I love.

My feet are off the ground before my girlfriend can complete the hug. The look of pure pain on her beautiful face makes my stomach turn and my heart ache but I don't have a choice. "Goodbye, love."

Lena screams. She screams so loud that I feel it vibrating through my bones, making my skin shiver and itch until I want to rip it right off my body. The sound rings in my ears until my eyes sting and shocking my brain. Her screams rip through my Kryptonian heart, taring a hole in me like bullets never could. Even as I fly miles and miles away, I hear the ghosts of her screaming echoing in my mind.

I can't turn back, I can't change what's already happened, all I can do is keep flying and hope I'm fast enough. I have to figure out exactly where to fly first... I try to silence the still overpowering sound of Lena crying and focus on Eliza. Though the noise of Lena is still heavy in my heart, I'm finally able to pick out the struggling and yelling of my earth mother.

"It'll never work, Lillian! She's smarter and braver and far more powerful than you think!" I hear the immense strain in Eliza's voice and the rattle of chains. I fly as fast as I can in the direction of their voices.

"I don't know about that, Miss Danvers." The twisted glee in Lillian Luthor's voice makes my stomach sick with anger and fear. "Your husband here has given us a lot of information regarding your adoptive daughter."

"Don't touch him, you-" Eliza practically hisses, but the crack of skin hitting skin drowns the rest of her words.

"You what, monster? Darling you don't even know the half of it." The Luthor cackles. She must have been practicing her evil laugh because it is definitely more sinister than usual. I guess delusion and desperation will do that to a person. "Tell me dear, you have one biological and one adopted child, same as me, do you love little Alex more than Kara? Where you disappointed when your favorite came out as an abomination? Well, I guess you raised two disappointments and I only raised one, so I win in that department."

"Go to hell!"

Come on Eliza, just hold on a little longer, I'm almost there! The wind slaps my face as I soar through the grey sky. The snow has finally stopped falling and it looks beautiful, laying like a blanket, untouched, across the vast expanse of sand before me. Large houses pop out of the snow, glazed in ice, almost like fortresses, and I can see the one I'm aiming for in the distance.

I can't help but wince as my super hearing picks up the sound of Lillian snarling. "I'm already here! The whole earth has been infested with the likes of your daughters. My sweet boy tried to save us, and the thanks he gets is being left to rot in a jail cell? And my poor, vulnerable daughter was manipulated by that abomination in a red cape?"

"Don't you dare talk about my daughters that way!"

"Why, do you not like the truth? I suppose most of the people on this miserable rock don't... I'm done trying to save the world, they had their chance and they chose to keep their eyes closed. Now, all I want, is for Supergirl to pay!" The distinct clink of a knife being released from it's case rings loudly through the evening sky to my ears, making my heart slam against my ribs. "Starting with this one..."

"No! Get away from her!" More metal and more screaming, a defiant protest from a clearly drugged Maggie. "Please, take me instead! Take me first, leave her alone!"

Bricks smash into dust as my fist blasts right through them, rocks crumbling under my trembling fingers. Glass shatters and wood from the window frame splinters into little pieces that fly across the room in all directions like tiny spears. If only one had hit Lillian...

"Stop! If you hurt her there is no deal."

Slowly, Lillian lowers her knife from Maggie's vulnerable, exposed throat. Tiny droplets of blood shine bright red against her tan skin and I can taste the copper in the air, but Maggie's head lolls forward and I breathe a sigh of relief. "Took you long enough, little Danvers." The detective manages to say through gasping breaths and glazed eyes.

"Well it's about time! For a minute there I thought you were going to make me kill your family one by one until you figured out I meant business. Shame my daughter isn't here, I would have started with her."

"What happened to you, Lillian?" I cross my arms over my chest to keep my twitching hands from reaching towards my family. Wait till her guard is down... "You used to be a doctor, you used to help people. Now you want to murder your own daughter and innocent people?"

"You happened! The Supers! You came to earth and turned our planet into your own personal playground. Now you've made it personal by turning my daughter against me; you corrupted her and I won't stand for it!" The glimmer in Lillian's eyes is that of a woman with nothing left to loose, and that is what makes her so dangerous. "Time to pay Supergirl!"

Lillian hurtles her knife at my chest, but I easily catch it in my fist, letting the metal warp and bend before falling to the floor with a loud clatter. But that must have been a signal because all of the sudden, the doors burst open and dozens of men swarm the room! Wind howls through the hole I blasted in the building and it kicks snow up around the black boots of the men and woman surrounding me.

"I don't want to hurt you!" I yell to them in a last ditch effort to get them to see reason.

The deranged woman only throws her head back in laughter. "But I want to hurt you! And the best way to hurt the girl of steel is to expose the monster you really are inside. You should know, I've engineered this particular brand of red kryptonite to bring out your especially violent attributes..."

Lillian flicks her finger and the soldiers' guns go off. Harsh yellow glows from the barrels and in an instant bright red bullets are flying at me from every direction. My earth mother screams, struggling against her restraints to no avail, and my earth father and my sister's drugged girl friend are too compromised to even move.

It all happens so fast! Pure instinct takes over, the kind of reaction that has to come from somewhere deep inside, and I fling my body across the room to shield my family from the shower of bullets. I pull the three of them close, extending my arms and cape as far as they will go.

With each boom of a gun another red kryptonite bullet hits me. I feel the intense energy of it before it even touches my skin, like it's sucking all of the good thoughts from my head and highlighting the bad ones. I twist in agony but will not move, I need to protect them!

When the rain of redK finally stops, my chest is heaving and my head feels so, so heavy. With my last conscious thoughts, I pull the IV's from Maggie and Jeremiah's arms, and snap the meager chains holding Eliza. I barely register the stream of blood gushing from Jeremiah's shoulder and chest as Eliza rushes forward to try and help him.

I stumble backwards, arms and legs shaking. My muscles ache and my throat burns, but with each breath I take more red kryptonite enters my system. I feel it's sinister power seeping through my veins, giving my strength from this well inside me that I didn't even know I had. It's the kind of energy that is raw and untamed, sprouted from secret pains and held tongues. It's like electricity as it works it's way into my heart and Rao does it feel good!

Slowly, I turn to face Lillian. Red Kryptonite flows though my body with my blood, and I wonder if I've ever felt this much like the person I am supposed to be. I am invincible!

The roar of a lion rips from my throat as heat pours from my eyes. The flowing blue curtains catch flame, igniting in a beautiful display of my power. The men and women quiver before me, shaking in their combat boots. Their fear fuels me. I am a god, they should bow before me! It would be fun to make them bow.

"You asked for this, Lillian!" The woman cackles, throwing her hands up to the heavens in what she thinks its victory. I can't wait to see the look on her stupid face when she realizes what she's done!

It's almost comical how easy it is to bend these puny humans to my will. With barely a flick of my wrist their fragile bodies are sent crashing into what remains of the brick walls. Bones snap and crack under the slightest touch of my fingers and their screams are like music to my ears. I don't stop until their melodies fall to silence and only half are left standing.

"Is this what you wanted?!" More heat sails from my eyes, singeing the curled hair just below Lillian Luthor's ear with perfect aim. Of course I could have killed her right there, oh and I plan to, but why not have some fun with my food first?

It's a beautiful sight! All of the color has drained from the powerful woman's face. Her hands are held up as if in surrender and I can hear the thudding of her terrified heart in her chest.

"I am Kara Zor-El, the last true Kryptonian, and I will end you Lillian Luthor! You have hurt what is mine and that is unforgivable!" Confusion flashes across her face making me laugh. "I'm talking about Lena of course! How does it feel to know that you will one day have grandchildren with alien blood running through their veins?"

Lillian takes slow, careful steps back, but there is no where on earth where she could run to escape from me. "I knew this is what you really are... You think Lena will still want you after you kill me, her own mother?"

These are just the sad attempts of a desperate woman trying to save her own worthless human life; I won't be fooled! Grinning from ear to ear, I surge forward. My fist is mere inches from her face when a yell makes me pause.

"Kara stop! Please honey, you don't have to do this!" It's my earth mother, the one who tried to control me, tried to make me hide my powers! A fresh wave of rage surges in my chest and distracts me from my previous target. "Please stop. I love you sweetie."

"Love?" In less than a second I'm hovering in front of her face. Blood streaks down her arms and her eyes are so tired that it almost makes me smile. "Love is not forcing someone to suppress who they truly are! All those years you kept me from my true potential; that's not love!"

"I was only doing what I thought was best for you, Kara. I do love you bunny, I love you so, so much." Bunny, the name triggers something in me, something that makes me pause and the haze of red momentarily lift. My head falls forward and I try to fight the demons inside me but I'm not even close to strong enough, and when I lift my head again, it's with red eyes.

"You know nothing about love!" She's on the floor before I know what happened. I feel tiny hands pushing lightly at my chest to get me away but the rage inside me narrows my vision. I can only vaguely hear Maggie pleading with me. She's still so weak from the drugs that she's not even worth my time, so I turn back to Lillian. "Now where were we?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part two will up soon so hopefully you don't have to wait too long to find out what happens next! You guys better buckle your seat belts!


	20. RedK Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience lovely readers! I started my new job this week so I've been insanely busy and haven't had nearly as much time to write as I would like.

Lillian Luthor trembles before me in fear for her own life, but there is a sick twisted grin across her face that makes my fists clench with rage. "I knew you were a monster, but this is far better than I ever could have dreamed! I could have killed you, but why kill you when you could suffer? Do you think anyone will stand behind you now, Supergirl? The public will know Lex and I were right all along!"

My boots make tiny craters in the floor with each step I take towards my target. The boom of my feet echos throughout the mansion, eclipsing the sound of humans gasping for air and struggling against pain. I can taste the copper essence of blood in the air as my lips pull back to grin.

"I don't need them standing behind me." Lillian raises an eyebrow, reminding me of Lena, the one woman who is allowed to stand beside me. "The humans will bow before me!"

Realization finally dawns Lillian, that there is no way out of this, that I will kill her no matter what, that her plan worked so well that it now won't work at all. An almost child-like glee bubbles up in my chest at the look on her face as I continue to close the gap between us. She matches each of my steps with her own giant leap back, but her back hits a wall and there's no where left to run. She looks like an animal trapped in a cage and I love it!

Slowly, just for fun, I raise my finger to her chest. I feel the pounding of her heart and smell the fear rolling off her in waves. "I'm going to kill you Lillian Luthor. And it is going to be slow and painful and you are going to regret everything you've ever done to hurt my family, every breath you ever took. It's over 'mom'. I'm going to rip your heart out..."

"Do it." She replies with a still defiant voice which only serves to make me angrier. "Your cousin took my son from me and you stole my daughter, the public sides with the alien terror despite me showing them the light, what do I have left to live for?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all."

My finger begins to press into her chest, nail first, until a trickle of blood breaks free from her skin. The rush sends shivers of delight down my spine and I press even harder. This is how I was meant to use my powers! Nothing can stop me now!

Suddenly gunshots, alien gunshots, ring through the building. Lasers slam against my shoulder, sending me a few steps back. They don't hurt, only infuriate me so much that I see red.

Completely pissed, I growl into the growing darkness, using my x-ray vision to scan the area where the shots came from. There, outside the hole my body made in the structure is that puny, worthless heap of skin who calls herself my sister!

She talks into her earpiece desperately, eyes wide and frantic. The team behind her is steady with resolve but they all seem to gulp nervously as she whispers, "Move in. Help will be here soon, we just have to keep her engaged long enough."

"Stay right here." I growl to my prey. "I'm not finished making you pay."

The team rushes in, a formation I know well, but they will be no match for me! Some of them engage with the remaining Cadmus thugs and the ones with heavier alien artillery focus on me. I soar around the house, dodging shot after shot with ease, I even do a back flip in the air just for fun. It's not long before I begin to grow tired of this game though and decide to swoop down on them.

My frost breath freezes one agent's feet to the spot and I push his torso over until his ankle snaps. The noise of it actually makes me giggle, but the pause is long enough for Alex to get a good shot in. The purple light hits my back full force, sending me to my knees. I kneel for no one! Alex is standing over me, about to hit me again, but there's a scream in the background that makes her freeze.

Lillian has pulled Maggie up by her long dark hair, knife pressed to her vulnerable throat once more, clearly intending to use the half-conscious girl as a shield or bargaining chip. The detective struggles as best she can, flailing her arms and legs and screaming up to the vaulted ceiling. "Alex, help!"

The human could have shot me again, she could have won, but Alex doesn't take the shot which enrages me more than anything. Instead, she sets her jaw, steadies her gun, and pulls the trigger. I watch as the purple beam leaves Alex's gun and soars through the crackling air as if in slow motion. It arches midair, swooping at just the right angle due to the wind, and blasts it's target with a deafening boom.

The agent was precise, even 2 centimeters to the right and it would have killed the girl she loves. At first I am begrudgingly impressed, but then I watch the blonde victim fall to the floor, body limp. I see the rosy color drain from her cheeks and the warmth she once possessed seep into the dark hardwood floor, and I'm overcome with anger again. Lillian was mine to kill, not a humans!

"How could you!"

I'm up off my knees in a fraction of the second, hands clenching the collar of Alex's armored jacket. "Kara..." She whispers, brown eyes searching red ones for some form of familiarity that she will not find.

"Why do you always have to do that! You can't have a life of your own so you ruin mine? Lillian was mine, I deserved to kill her!"

"But... but I had no choice, she was going to kill Maggie..."

"So what! You would be better off without her in your life anyway. You should know better than anyone that you don't really deserve to be happy."

Anger burns in my chest with an intensity I haven't allowed myself to feel for a long, long time; probably since I was a little girl, wide eyed and terrified by the strange new planet and my strange new powers. It fills me up, drowning out all other emotions and sounds. My muscles flex with it, unable to contain the incredible power within them.

"I wish I never had a sister!" My hands hit her shoulders, driven forward by my anger.

I can vaguely register screaming in the background and loud sobs mixed with the residual fighting of DEO vs Cadmus, but they're nothing more than an annoying buzz in the back of my mind. I watch with joy as the human hits the far wall and crumbles onto the dark hardwood floor. Red blood oozes from underneath her dark hair. She reaches for me, a beautiful look of pain and betrayal and love in her eyes before they flutter closed. A part of me wants to vomit and my head spins violently, but I shove it down and fly to her unconscious form.

"You never could keep up with me." Her breath comes in ragged, shallow breaths and her body twitches from the trauma. I look down at her with nothing but disgust as I let the anger take over again. "Now you can finally stop trying."

Heat rises in me like a bomb waiting to go off. It charges behind my eyes as I wait to deliver the final blow, only hesitating in order to savor the moment longer. Sighing happily, I close my eyes and when I open them, only power will be visible.

"Kara, stop!" The voice is like a cold bucket of water being dumped over my head. It sends shivers down my spine and a wave of happiness to my chest.

"Lena!" I spin around, boots hovering a few feet above the floor and cape twirling around them. "I'm so glad you could make it!"

She looks so beautiful as she runs towards me, cheeks flushed and hair wind swept. Tears shimmer in her green eyes but I think it adds to her ethereal beauty. She's truly a goddess and I have no idea why she was cursed to govern this miserable rock, but I am so glad we met.

"Baby please, you have to stop." Lena comes crashing to a hault in front of me, too far away for my liking. Her hands are balled into fists, nails carving little crescent moons into her soft palms. Her full lips quiver as she takes a shaky breath in.

"Lena, are you scared of me?" I narrow my eyes and focus my hearing on the pounding murmur of her heart. She is...

"No." My girlfriend tips her chin up in defiance but you don't need x-ray vision to see right through her.

"Oh Lena." I approach carefully, not wanting to frighten her further. Her breath makes little clouds in the cold air that fall hotly on my skin as I slowly reach up and cup her cheek. Despite her bravado, Lena flinches under my fingers. "You have nothing to fear from me, goddess. You and I were meant to rule the earth together! I could never hurt my queen."

She leans into my palm and tears seep out from under her long lashes. "I want to believe that Kara." Her long fingers wrap themselves around my hand and she pulls back. "But how can I? Not when you're like this."

"But I've never been more myself than I am now! This is who I was meant to be, Lena! I was always destined for greatness." Confusion and anger begin to creep up on me again. "I thought you would understand..."

"I do, baby." Her lips feel like heaven as she kisses my knuckles and I'm momentarily lost in the feeling. "You're the most amazing person I know Kara, but part of what makes you great is your restraint, your incredible capacity for mercy."

"Are you trying to trick me?" I don't know what's going on, my head pounds and I feel dizzy, but I can't shake the feeling that I'm being deceived.

"Of course not! I'm just asking that you spare your sister, then we can rule together like you want."

"She's not my sister!"

"Okay, okay. I was just saying-" Lena holds her hands up as if in surrender and I see the fear return to her green eyes.

"So you want to control me too? I have these amazing gifts, why should I hold back?"

"That' not-"

"It is though!" I hit the ground with a heavy thud, wood splintering under my feet. Lena stumbles back, only making the anger heavier in my head. It's like a cloud I can't shake, so I embrace it instead! "AH!" I let a frustrated scream rip free from my throat and fill the whole room until there's nothing left. With my hands clenched into fists, I spin away from Lena and heat leaves my eyes before I can even think about stopping it. I don't want it to consume me though, I want it to consume the world!

"No!" Lena's heart wrenching cry is enough to make me snap my eyes closed, and when I open them, all the air leaves my lungs. "Stupid girl! What did you do?!"

In an instant I'm before her. Lena is crouched in a ball, cradling a burnt arm to her chest and sobbing through gritted teeth. I kneel down to help her up, but she jerks away and flings herself over the intended target again like I'm going to attack once more.

"Why did you do that?" I demand, yelling with desperation.

"You would have killed Alex..."

"So?" Angry tears burn at my sky blue eyes but I'm too proud to let them fall. "This is all her fault anyway! Move Lena, let me finish this!"

"No!"

How dare she defy me! "I said move!"

"You're going to have to kill me too then." She sets her jaw, even as her burnt skin oozes and my earth 'sisters' blood is smeared across her palms, and I know she won't budge.

Anguish and rage makes my heart beat faster as I hiss out, "Why are you doing this, Lena? You could have rules beside me, now you'll be just another dead Luthor..."

"Because." her eyes soften and she reaches out with trembling fingers to cup my cheek. "Because I can't let the woman I love become a monster." She gazes at me with such love and intensity, it triggers something within me.

It's like a battle is being waged inside me. Anger fighting compassion and I have no idea which is winning. I have to stop!

"Winn, now!" Lena screams and glances over my shoulder.

A dark red blast of energy is the last thing I see before my world starts to go black. "Oh Rao, I'm so sorry." I whisper as I feel myself slipping away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that was a rollercoaster! But I promise hope is not lost. Bare with me guys! Comments make me so flippin happy I can't even thank you guys enough!


	21. The Aftermath

The first thing I feel is pain. It radiates from my pounding skull, down my spine, infiltrating every single cell in my body until it becomes unbearable. I go to cry out because of it, but it's like my mouth is glued shut and my muscles are far too heavy to lift, even for the strongest being on this planet.

The next thing I feel is guilt. It hits me like a meteor, blasting into my chest until I can't breathe under it's crushing weight. What did I do?! Anguish and despair force my eyelids to squeeze shut tighter as I struggle to escape this dark prison. But it's no use, all I can register is unfathomable pain and in my heart I know there is no way to escape it.

"Kara, Kara sweetie it's okay! I'm here." Cool fingers wrap themselves around the wrists that I've finally managed to twitch, making my head spin even more. What is going on?

Reacting on pure instinct, I continue to fight against the oppressive pain and now the soft voice too. My throat feels as dry as the sprawling sands of Krypton and my lips are as cracked as the foundation around my childhood home there, inevitably turned to dust along with those I loved. I manage to cry out into the swirling void of painful memories and overwhelming guilt, my heart feeling like it's been tared to shreds as I scream.

"Hey, hey Kara it's me!" Those same cool fingers as before desperately stroke through the sweaty locks of my hair and brush themselves over my heated forehead. They feel good, too good; I don't deserve that kind of compassion. "It's me. It's Lena."

Lena... In the darkness I find a pair of bright green eyes shining down on me, eyes the exact same shade of green as the rocks from my home planet, but my planet is gone and I recognize these eyes as my home now. My home, my Lena...

I sink into the soft fabric that surrounds me, finally giving in. The pain is too heavy right now, I can't keep fighting it, but with Lena's soft comforting presence beside me maybe I can heal. I register the pulsating glow of yellow sun against my skin and soak it up. My body finally relaxes, aching muscles loosing their tension and the pounding in my head is reduced to a dull throb.

"L-Lena." It burns to talk, like fire is rising from my chest to singe my vocal chords, so I quickly close my mouth again. The rest of my words get lost to the darkness anyway as I hear a strangled sob leave her lips.

"It's okay baby, I'm here." She grips my hand tightly, tethering me to this world. "I'm not going anywhere."

I don't have the strength to squeeze her hand back, but my fingers twitch against her palm, making Lena inhale a shaky breath of relief. Warmth and light seem to surround me now, making a sense of calm settle into my aching bones. The pitch black of my vision lessens to a pale grey and my breathing comes easier.

"I promise baby, I'm not going anywhere."

Floating in a sea of guilt and pain, but also love and support, I get lost again behind my eyelids. I feel myself drifting away and try not to fight it, because I know that when I wake up shining green eyes will be waiting for me.

___________

"Are you sure this is normal, Alex? I know all her vitals are stable and her neuro functioning is good, but something seems wrong..."

"She's never been out this long before, maybe I could order another scan?"

The voices are like tiny beacons, two lighthouses way out in the distance calling me home. I cling to them, trying to ignore the spinning in my head and stones in my stomach.

"It couldn't hurt. I just, she should have come back to us by now!"

"Hey, it's going to be okay. Maybe you should go home and get some rest, come back feeling refreshed? You haven't left since she moved the other day and I'm sure your company needs you."

"She needs me more."

"Just, promise not to stay too late, okay? I mean this in the nicest way possible, but you look like you haven't slept in days..."

Both voices sound so sad, so lost, and it adds to the oppressive haze of pain in my chest. I try to reach out to them but that only leads to a stabbing jolt through my arm. It hurts so bad that I can't help but open my dry mouth and groan, head lolling to the side from the strain. "Sor-mmmm, ughhhh."

Yellow sun rays assault the backs of my eyelids, shining through the residual darkness. It would be so easy to slip away again, but I hear those soft voices gasp and they give me the extra little boost I need to finally flutter my eyes open. The whole world is spinning! Shades of blues and greys and shadowy figures that are just out of focus dance around in my field of view. Everything is blurry and undefined and so damn painful!

My body screams in protest, limbs feeling heavier than entire solar systems. "Kara!" I only really hear the voice in the back of my mind, all I can truly focus on is the screaming. I remember the sound of bones snapping and maniacal laughter and so, so much screaming so vividly that it feels like I'm reliving it.

"No, no I'm sorry!" The words claw their way up my throat with the taste of coppery blood. My eyes are wide, searching the still spinning room for something solid to hold on to. I don't know what is real, what is the product of my unconsciousness, and what is a memory. All I know for sure is that I did something terrible, unforgivable.

Bile rises from my stomach, searing my inside and choking me until I can't breathe. I feel hands on my shoulders and arms but I struggle easily against them until I can sit up and throw my head over the side of the hospital bed. Vomit splashes onto the tile floor with a sensation I haven't experienced since I was a child. Everything hurts and everything is wrong and I wish I could go back in time-

"Shhh, shhh it's okay love." Soft hands caress my back with a kindness I don't deserve. Another set of hands gently wipes my mouth with a napkin before raising a cup of water to my lips. The liquid is cold and grounding and I drink it eagerly until there is nothing left and my head hurts just a little less.

I let them guide me back so that I'm laying down again and feel the bed dip beside me. Slowly, my vision adjusts completely, but when it does I wish I was still unconscious. "Oh Lena, Alex... I'm so sorry!"

Black stitches lace from my beautiful sister's temple and disappear under her auburn hair. They look angry and painful in their healing, and tears burn at the corner of my eyes the longer I stare at them. When I finally turn my head away, I find a large white bandage covering Lena's forearm and then the tears really start flowing.

"I hurt you! Lillian was right, I am a monster. Rao, what have I done?" Everything feels overwhelming, like my nerves are open and exposed, and there's nothing I can do to stop the onslaught of emotions ripping through my chest. Tears fall hot and heavy down my cheeks and I grip the soft cotton of the blanket, pulling it up to hide my face in shame.

"I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!" I repeat it like a mantra, face buried in the blanket as I rock back and forth. I can hear nothing but the sound of my own sobs and the racing thoughts in my head. I fold into myself, unable to feel anything but crushing guilt and anger. How could I do this! I need to leave, right now, before I hurt anyone else! "I'm sorry, I have to go..."

Still dizzy and unaware of my surroundings, I fling the blanket off and look around almost frantically for an exit. Everything is blurry and everything hurts and the tile is so cold and slippery under my bare feet. I'm vaguely aware of hands on my hospital gown but I move too quickly for them to stay, knocking my hip into a table in the process of escaping. I see Alex and Lena's mouths moving but can't hear any words coming out, all I can focus on is getting to the door.

My fingers touch the cold metal, sliding down the side of the knob in a pathetic attempt to open it. But before I can figure this damn thing out, it opens for me! The door swings back, making me loose my footing and fall face first into the person on the other side. Strong arms catch me before I hit the floor and hold me close. With my ear pressed to his chest I can hear the steady rhythm of his heart, thump, thump, thump, and my limbs become useless.

Tears roll down my cheeks with renewed vigor and I fear that they're going to drown me. If they did, I would deserve it. But J'onn just gently lifts me, bracing my painful body in his strong arms and setting me back down in the bed I was just trying so desperately to leave. He carefully tucks my legs under the covers, sits beside me, and cradles my head in his lap, stroking his dark fingers through my hair.

He doesn't say anything, no one does. Lena and Alex sit on the other side of me, quiet except for a few sniffles. The three of them watch over me, protecting me, the person who is supposed to be the hero, and let me cry and cry and cry until there are no tears left. 

The heaving of my chest finally slows as the well of tears runs dry. I close my eyes for a moment, trying to breathe deeply and absorb the comforting energy of my family around me. After a long moment, I finally find the courage to open my eyes again. I slide up so that I'm sitting straight, hands folding in my lap. "Did I kill anyone?" My voice sounds foreign to me; it's the voice of a frightened child, not a superhero.

"There are...injuries." J'onn says softly, tilting my chin up to look at his steady, firm expression. "But none of them are your fault."

Biting my lip hard, I duck my head down again, unable to look at them from the debilitating guilt and shame. "You need to lock me up J'onn..."

"No." Alex says it in this voice that seems to leave no room for debate. She always was the strong one... "No. Kara, listen to me." It takes everything I have to force myself to make eye contact. "What happened was horrible, but it wasn't your fault! You can't blame yourself for what other people made you do. You are the most selfless, compassionate, bravest, kindest person I know. You went through something traumatic, and we are going to get you help."

I hear my sister's words but I can't believe them, not now, not when I still don't know how much destruction I left in my wake. "Is Maggie okay? Jeremiah and Eliza?

"Maggie is fine! She was a little shaken up but she's totally fine. Eliza is okay too, she's downstairs in the lab right now but I'm sure she'll come up soon."

I don't even know if I can face her... "What about your dad?"

Alex's chocolate eyes flicker to the floor and her eyebrows scrunch up the way she does when she's trying to force down her emotions. I feel my heart breaking into pieces again but I'm almost numb to it now, almost. "He um, he's in a coma. But it's not your fault! He was injured by the redk bullets Cadmus shot, not you, and we suspect Cadmus had been torturing him for weeks prior to the attack."

I cover my face with my hands and close my eyes tight. I don't know how to feel, how to even begin processing or accepting it. My head starts to pound again and I can't help but let out a strangled whimper. "I am so sorry Alex."

"It's okay, Kara." My sister replies softly, rubbing soothing circles on my back. "He's going to pull through and everything is going to be okay."

I think she's lying, but I let myself be comforted by her words anyway. I lean into her touch, feeling completely drained, and sigh heavily. Sensing my emotions, J'onn whispers. "I think that's enough for now. You need some rest little one."

The Martian leans down and kisses my forehead, making fresh tears prickle at the corner of my eyes. I almost call him 'dad' as he walks away. Alex follows him, smiling softly before leaving the room. Only Lena is left and I don't know if I want to hug her, close my eyes, or tell her to leave. I'm no good for her now, it's too dangerous...

"Lena, I-" I search for words that probably don't exist on this planet and fall completely silent when I see the bandage on her arm. There's nothing I could say, in any language, to express how sorry I am and how much I regret everything. Or how much I love her...

Lena's green eyes are intense and unreadable, and her shoulders hold tension that makes me nervous. Wordlessly, she climbs under the covers. Her cool skin feels like a sanctuary as she wraps me in her arms, tucking me under her chin and holding me close. I hear the hitch in her breathing and murmur of her heart and close my eyes, soaking in everything that is Lena Luthor.

Wet tears fall onto my golden hair, soaking into the pillow between us. She shudders as she cries, little waves of pain and relief rolling off of her. She clutches my hospital gown in her trembling fingers and I know this embrace is as much for me as it is for her.

Beautiful, shivering words fall from her tongue in a language that is foreign to her. Words that I haven't even dreamed in years, words that leave me breathless and crying again and hopeful. "I love you." She says it in Kryptonese. "I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may or may not have cried when writing this...


	22. I'll Crawl Home To Her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd recommend listening to Work Song by Hozier before reading but you'll get the point either way. Enjoy!

The city seems different to me as I look out through the tinted windows of Lena Luthor's car. It's too quiet, there's no sirens or screaming or rambunctious laughter, no one calling out for Supergirl, only the quiet murmur of Lena's heart and the soft rustling of fabric as I inch closer to her. The usually bright lights of the city seem muted and the once pure white snow is now tainted grey from the traffic. I can't help but feel like while I was sleeping, the city was too.

Backing away from the window, I sigh and rest my head on her shoulder, blonde hair spilling across the maroon wool of her jacket. "Tell me again what I missed when I was unconscious?"

Lena chuckles softly and looks down at me with amused, although mildly concerned eyes. "Not much, honey. J'onn kept everyone safe, helping when he could, but it was relatively quiet. As far as the world knows, Supergirl was injured after her final battle with Lillian Luthor and was taking some time to recover, while Kara Danvers was off on assignment in Metropolis."

With wide eyes I glance at the partition between Lena's driver in the front and us in the back, squeezing her tightly instinctively. Lena quickly kisses my knuckles to calm my fears. "Don't worry, it's sound proof." I've definitely been more on edge this past week and breathe a heavy sigh of relief at her words. "Believe me, the cat is now safely back in the bag and we are going to keep it that way."

"Hmph." I sigh with a chuckle. "Tell that to my surge in social media followers." After the stunt we barely managed to pull off with J'onn at the press conference, most citizens have gone back to idly dreaming about what Supergirl's secret identity might be, but there are still a few conspiracy theorists out there who are far closer to the truth than I'd like. Alex tried to keep me from reading the fan blogs and webpages but I just couldn't help myself.

"So, are you excited to finally go home?" Lena asks gently, trying to steer me away from potentially upsetting thoughts. She's been so good through all of this, always supportive and by my side. I feel bad because she's going through her own battles too, but without her I can genuinely say that I would still be curled up in a ball, crying and unable to move because of what happened.

"Yes? I mean I'm thrilled not to be cooped up at the DEO anymore; between the three full weeks of being unconscious and another week of regaining my strength a whole month has gone by without me really being a part of it, so I'm excited for that. Plus I miss my own bed. On the other hand, I can't help but feel like the safest place for me to be was at the DEO. That way if anything happened they had the technology to stop me."

Biting my lip, I look down and fiddle with loose threads of my long sleeves, pulling the fabric over my hands and balling them into fists. They could kill me before I hurt anyone. I don't say it exactly like that, but it's what I mean and Lena knows it. Every day I think about what would have happened if they had killed me, how many less people would have been injured, and my heart fucking aches.

"Kara...nothing bad is going to happen. Cadmus has been shut down permanently and the rest of my mother's red krpytonite was destroyed. You are never going to have to feel like that again."

But what if I do? What if those thoughts and feelings, those sick desires, force their way into my head again? What if I already feel those things somewhere deep down inside of me and don't even need the Luthor version of redk to bring it to the surface? What if that's my destiny?

Lena sees the thoughts racing across my mind and knits her brows together, red lips pouting. Before she can say anything, the car rolls to a hault, stopping in front of my apartment building as the driver lowers the partition. "Shall I wait out here Miss Luthor?"

"Yes, thank-"

"No!" The two of them look at me, each with raised eyebrows. An amused expression dances through Lena's eyes as she waits expectantly for me to continue. "I mean, umm... Would it be okay if, would you mind maybe staying over tonight?" I sit up straight, pushing my glasses higher up the bridge of my nose. "I really just don't want to be alone tonight, Lena."

Hearing the desperation in my tone, my girlfriend looks serious again as she turns to her driver. "You heard the lady Maverick, I guess you have the night off."

"Thank you Miss Luthor, Miss Danvers."

The older gentleman goes to get up from his seat and come around to get the doors but Lena is quicker. She ushers me into the chilled January air, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and hugging me close, in a gesture of comfort more than to keep me warm. Even though I'm not cold at all, I shiver and lean into her welcomed touch.

Waving at the driver, he gives me a smile and a little wink before driving away, leaving just me and Lena on the sidewalk in front of my building. The sight of the familiar red brick exterior should be comforting, instead it makes my stomach clench in knots. Lena rubs my shoulders and tilts her head up. "Ready, babe?" When I don't say anything, she kisses my cheek lightly and whispers. "It's going to be okay, I'm with you."

I take a deep breath, letting the crisp air fill my lungs and escape slowly to form a little cloud in front of us. Before I can over analyze further, I grip the cold metal handle and quickly push, but my step forward is haulted as I body slam the glass.

My cheeks burn bright red and I look around frantically, hoping no one saw that. Lena covers her mouth, eyes wide, and tries to stifle a laugh rather unsuccessfully. I face plant onto her shoulder with a groan. "It's a pull...a pull!" Laughter bubbles up in my chest for the first time since I woke up. It feels almost unfamiliar as it leaves my lips but so, so good! "I've lived here for four years!"

Lena can't control her laughter now and neither can I. We lean against each other, shoulders shaking and clutching our stomachs as we laugh and laugh and laugh. Tears sting my eyes without even a hint of sadness and I smile widely. "Don't you dare tell anyone about this, Lena Luthor!"

My girlfriend holds her hands up in mock surrender, shaking her head and smiling. "Can't ruin your reputation as the least dorky, adorable person on the planet, can we?" I roll my eyes, making Lena chuckle. "Come on you puppy, lets go." She opens the door, pulling this time, and suddenly this doesn't seem so scary.

Hand in hand we walk up the red and gold carpeted staircase, still smiling. I try to focus on the feel of her soft skin against mine and the flutter of her uneven heart beat. My super hearing inadvertently picks up the low grumble of her stomach, making my own burst to life and start to scream. "Oh Rao, what are we going to do for dinner? I'm sure all my food is bad by now and take out is going to take forever to get here this kind of night!"

Lena darts her eyes down and starts to blush. "Well, about that..." We reach my door and she busies herself with unlocking it, taking a bit longer than necessary. "Alex and I, we umm." I quirk my eyebrow, glad that my sister and girlfriend have been bonding but a little worried about where this is going. "She helped me break in!"

Finally swinging the door open, Lena gestures for me to go inside first and she follows. At first I don't notice anything out of the ordinary. I flip on the lights, running my gaze over the inviting couch and bright decor. I smile at the paintings on the walls, labors of love that calm my mind and make me happy. I continue to scan the room though, not seeing what could be different.

Giving up, I look at Lena with a puzzled expression. She just bites her lip and nods towards the fridge. "No way!" I eagerly slip my glasses down and x-ray the refrigerator, squealing in delight with what I find. "Potstickers!"

"And Ice cream and pizza and some actually healthy food, because at least one meal should contain some form of nutritional value."

"You are the best, holy Rao!" I jump up on my tiptoes and give her a quick peck before literally skipping to the waiting food. Who has time for a microwave when you have heat vision? It's not until I have three whole potstickers in my mouth that I sheepishly offer one to Lena.

"Well I'm just glad I could make you happy." She giggles and takes one, eating it at a much more reasonable pace than me.

Once I finally finish what is already in my mouth I look up at her and grin. "You just being you makes me happy."

Lena blushes, biting her lip the way she does that makes me crazy. "Come on Super puppy, there's one more surprise. And no x-ray vision this time!" I shove another potsticker in my mouth before taking Lena's hand. I let her lead me to the bedroom, heart racing the whole time and resist the very tempting urge to use my powers to peek. "Close your eyes."

I watch Lena carefully and she grins when I don't comply. Shaking her head, she moves behind me. Her body is warm and firm against mine as she wraps her arms around me and covers my eyes with her hands.

"Just a few more steps." Lena carefully guides me into my bedroom. I hear her heart beating rapidly and the hitch in her breathing, it makes my own body hum with excitement. "Okay Kara, open up."

Her hands fall away, ghosting down my sides to settle at my hips. Slowly I blink my eyes open, taking a second to adjust to the dim, mutli-colored glow. I don't understand at first, but then my vision fully adjusts and warmth floods my entire body. "Lena!" My hands instinctively go up to cover my mouth and my blue eyes go wide with surprise.

In the corner of my bedroom is a beautiful, towering pine. It fills the room with the delicious scent of winter and the rainbow colored lights wrapped around it cast a soft glow to land at our feet. Sparkling ornaments twirl and glitter at the end of long branches and a big, yellow star shines brightly at the top.

"Do you like it, love?" My beautiful girlfriend whispers softly, watching me with hopeful, wide eyes. "You were unconscious for the holidays so I figured this would be nice to come home to."

"Lena." I spin around to fully face her, twirling her long dark locks between my fingers. "Lena, it's perfect. Thank you! This is just what I needed." I rest my forehead on hers, breathing in deeply the smell of her expensive perfume and something that is uniquely Lena Luthor. Tears begin to prickle at my eyes once more and Lena gently wipes them away. "I'm so sorry I left you alone for another holiday. I wanted to be there..." My voice cracks and I bite my lip, darting my gaze away from her piercing green eyes.

"Hey, it's okay Kara. Just promise me that we'll spend many more holidays together, okay?"

I don't have it in me to respond. I just let the tears trickle down and nuzzle my cheek into the palm of her hand as I nod. "Okay." We stay like that for a little while, basking in the glow of our Christmas tree and each other. I soak in her strength, borrowing some of the steel that lives inside her, the steel that guards her soft, compassionate, loving heart. 

My girlfriend kisses me languidly, lips dancing against mine, pulling the breath from my lungs. She feels like summer, bright and fresh and warm, and I kiss her until I can't feel anything else. When we finally pull back, Lena is gazing at me with kind eyes, eyes that are both my kryptonite and my salvation. I could spend forever staring into those eyes.

Despite myself, a wave of exhaustion washes over me. I think she can tell because her lips curl up in a sly smile and she glances to the bed. "So which side is going to be mine? I prefer the left, but I'm flexible." 

Chuckling, I quirk an eyebrow. "I bet you are." I let the innuendo hang in the air and Lena eats it up, giving me her signature smirk. I saunter to my wardrobe, doing my best to play coy. Digging through the draw, I pull out an old oversized band t-shirt and toss it to Lena, picking out a pair of boy shorts and a comfy tank top for myself.

I expect Lena to go to the bathroom to change, but I should know by now to expect the unexpected from my Luthor. She slowly slides the sleeves of her jacket off her arms, letting it fall to the floor between us. My mouth goes dry as I watch her, turning her back to me and glancing over her shoulder as she takes off her blouse and unclasps her bra. Pulling my shirt over her head, lena turns back to me with a wicked grin and shimmies her pants off her long, beautiful legs. "Your turn."

My cheeks flush bright red and I fumble with my clothes. Lena giggle softly but the sound makes me feel more comfortable and I relax under her gaze. As confidently as I can, I slip out of my college sweat shirt and into my pajamas. Lena's eyes are on me the whole time, drinking me in but never once making me feel self conscious.

"You're beautiful, Kara Danvers." My girlfriend gently takes off my glasses, setting them down on the nightstand. "My hero." 

I giggle, brushing my stray hair behind my ears before tossing my arms around Lena's neck. "You make me feel beautiful."

Lena kisses me again and we fall back onto the bed easily. There is nothing demanding about our kiss, nothing forceful or needy, only love and acceptance. We pull the comforter up around our shoulders, legs tangling together under the blankets. Her breath falls hot on my neck as her fingers dance across my skin. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Lena." 

Our kisses become even lazier as exhaustion begins to set in. I smile up at Lena with sleepy lids and she blushes softly. "Can I be your big spoon?"

"Yes!" I eagerly flip around and press my back to Lena. She wraps her strong arms around me and holds me close. She squeezes me tighter and I close my eyes, trying to force away my residual fears of this being my first day back in the world. Lena makes me feel safe.

The even sound of her breathing calms the racing of my heart and lulls me into a light slumber. I sigh contently and relax into Lena's arms, letting myself get carrier away into dark dreams...

_________________

Pain, fire, screaming, my sister unconscious, the love of my life crying, red coating everything and blood dripping down my fingers. I can't stop it! It's everywhere! What have I done?! Why can't I stop!! 

Screaming and crying rips from my throat and I thrash in an effort to get away from the destruction I've caused. It feels like there's an entire planet on my chest and I struggle to breathe under it's weight, gasping desperately for air.

"Kara! Kara wake up! It's just a dream!" Lena? A dream? Everything feels fuzzy and painful and dark and I'm trapped! But then Lena calls out again, her voice cutting through the oppressive daze "It's just a dream!"

My eyes snap open but the death and destruction still lingers in my vision. Soft fingers in my hair try desperately to push them away and finally lips touch my temple and they're gone completely. I breathe a ragged sigh of relief and my shoulders shake as I cry.

"It's okay, you're okay, everyone is okay baby." Lena keeps stroking my hair and she holds me close. I wrap my arms around her neck and my legs around her waist, clinging to her like she's the only real thing in the world. She holds me for what feels like hours as I cry, until her soft, melodic voice drifts to my ears and calms my soul.

"Boys working on empty, is that the kinda way to face the burning heat? I just think about my baby, I'm so full of love I could barely eat.

There's nothing sweeter than my baby. I never want once from the cherry tree.

Cause my baby's sweet as can be. Gives me toothaches just from kissing me." Her lips are light against my skin, slightly tickling but mostly soothing. Slowly but surely, I'm able to start catching my breath.

"When my, time comes around, lay me gently in the cold dark earth. No grave can hold me body down. I'll crawl home to her." Her voice is the most beautiful sound I have ever heard. It fills my mind, drowning out everything else. 

"My baby never fret none, about what my hands and my body done

If the Lord don't forgive me, I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me

When I was kissing on my baby and she put her love down soft and sweet

In the lowland plot I was free Heaven and hell were words to me."

I think Lena Luthor is my heaven. 

"When my, time comes around, lay me gently in the cold dark earth. No grave can hold my body down. I'll crawl home to her."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentines and Galentines everybody! This story is almost over and I am so lucky and thrilled that you guys stayed this long. I love you!


	23. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to show two women believing in each other and building each other up in a healthy wlw relationship, and I think this chapter accomplished that. I'm so sick of the show putting Kara with someone, who in my opinion is abusive, and sees her as weakness instead of a strength. They're not each other's kryptonite, Lena and Kara are each other's yellow sun.

I wake up cold, which is weird because I'm never actually cold. Even when I visit the fortress of solitude in only my super-suit I'm not actually cold, just more aware of the chill.

It seems to have set into my bones, making them feel heavy and stiff. I try to shake it off and struggle to blink my eyes open fully, rubbing the crust of dried tears from the corners, and yawn loudly. My joints crack as I stretch, reaching up to the stars painted on my ceiling before tying my hair into a messy bun with the black band around my wrist.

Once I'm sitting up completely, a feat in and of itself, I look over to the too neat other side of my bed and realize that it's not actually cold I'm feeling, more of an absence of warmth. I face plant into the place my girlfriend used to be, diving down with a heavy sigh. The pillows still smell like her floral shampoo, and her expensive perfume clings to the sheets.

Lena must have left early this morning when I was too exhausted to notice, even pulling up the covers in an attempt to make the bed look neat and unslept-in. I check the nightstand, hoping for a note but there is none. Was my outburst last night too much for her to handle? Did she finally realize how dangerous I am?

I remember the feel of her soft yet strong arms around me and the beautiful sound of her singing, so smooth and comforting it brings tears to my eyes again. She held me through all that pain, promised to be there in the morning, but where is she?

Bacon...I was so caught up in my worst case scenario-self depreciating mind set that my super nose almost missed it! But no food can be hidden from me for long; I could be dying and still smell bacon from a mile away. I tilt my chin up, lifting my head out of the mountain of blankets I've burrowed under. Yep. definitely bacon, and pancakes too!

I x-ray vision through my apartment just to confirm and literally squeal with delight at what I see. Lena didn't leave me! I didn't actually think she did, but she's in my kitchen, wearing my pajamas, and humming while she cooks breakfast! I must still be dreaming. I breathe in the wonderful scent of breakfast food drifting through my bedroom and all the cold is gone.

Warm sunlight seeps into my tanned skin from the open window, fighting off that heavy feeling I woke up with. I jump out of bed easily, spurred on by the promise of my girlfriend and pancakes. Slipping on my furry slippers, I hurry out to the kitchen, not even bothering to check myself in the mirror first.

I skid to a stop, crashing into the island where Lena is working in my excitement. "You're making breakfast?"

Lena chuckles, her green eyes lighting up in a way that is even more exciting for me than food. "Isn't that what a girlfriend is supposed to do after spending the night?"

I feel bright red blush creeping into my cheeks so I duck my head down, unable to stop the grin that's spreading from ear to ear. "Yeah...yeah, I guess so."

With her long, delicate fingers my girlfriend picks a strawberry out of the fruit she's chopping. She watches me with blown pupils as she swirls it around my lips before letting me take it between my teeth. "Mhmm, good?"

I hum in approval and nod, unable to take my eyes off the way my large t-shirt dips low on her to reveal an expanse of milky skin. "Delicious." I'm only partially talking about the food.

Lena bites her lip, smirking in the way she does that is only ever directed at me. "Than why don't you have some more?" She quirks her eyebrow with a challenge, a game, one that I don't exactly know the rules of but am determined to play.

I move around to the other side of the island as Lena turns so that her back is resting against it. A light dusting of flour on her cheeks and red stains on the tips of her fingers from cutting strawberries only make her look more attractive to me. Here in my too cheerful, bright apartment, wearing lazy clothes and messy hair, just the two of us, on a Sunday morning, Lena seems more real and herself than ever before. Of course the tough, business savvy CEO is her too, as is the temptress at the gay karaoke bar, but this is the real Lena. My Lena. And I love all of her.

The skin of her waist is soft and warm under my hands as I sneak them under the hem of her shirt to pull her close. Her whole body seems to hum, buzzing ever so slightly against me.

"Thank you." I whisper, nose to nose. "For everything."

Her hands lock behind my neck and her eyes are soft before she closes them and kisses me. With the warm sunlight on our skin, the smell of bacon and pancakes in the air, and the taste of strawberries on our lips, I know that I could kiss this woman for the rest of my life and be incredibly happy doing so. Guilt settles in the pit of my stomach at the thought though but Lena's firm lips keep it at bay.

We pull back, slightly breathless. Her pale cheeks are flushed and her green eyes shimmer. "Welcome home baby."

I chuckle softly and press my forehead to my girlfriend's. "I could get used to this." I feel the waves of content, happy energy rolling off of Lena and it makes my heart sing. Yep, I could definitely get used to this. But that little twinge of guilt makes itself known again and I have to sigh. "Is it wrong?"

"Is what wrong, darling?" Lena pulls back and cups my checks in her warm hands.

I lean into her palms, nuzzling them for comfort. "Is it wrong that I get to come home to you, when some people are never going to come home to their partners again? Is it wrong that I get to be happy?" The words feel heavy in my chest and I struggle to even say them. I know I've thought about this a lot since the incident but it's so hard to actually express anything. Lena has been so comforting and just exceptional through all of this, but sometimes I can't help but feel like I don't deserve it.

"Kara, you need to stop beating yourself up about it. What happened that night wasn't your fault, it was my mother's. None of it would have happened if it wasn't for her." She bites her lip, casting her gaze to the floor, and speaking softly. "No one would have gotten hurt if I wasn't a Luthor..."

"Lena..." I don't know what to say. I mean obviously I knew she was going through trauma too, but I didn't know that she internalized so much, and it makes me feel awful. None of this is her fault!

"I love you." The words fall from my lips strong and steady and leave absolutely no room for debate. "I love you as Lena, as a Luthor, as a scientist, as a chef, as a woman. You are not your mother; you are more than your last name." I feel her body shudder and she presses herself closer to me subconsciously. I don't know how someone can be so small and soft and strong all at the same time. "We are both the last of our kind, aren't we? Left some legacy to fulfill and crazy expectations to live up to. But Lena, you are so much more than you think you are! You have constellations on your palms and entire solar systems in your eyes. You are brilliant and beautiful and generous and kind and in no way to blame for any of the wrong your family has done. I love you to the ends of the universe and back."

"Thank you." Her voice is cracked and broken and small, but I can feel the fire returning to her body, the extra flare that she usually has, and it makes me hopeful again. All the bad thoughts drift away with her arms around me.

"You make me a better person, Lena. With you by my side, I know I can be the hero that everyone needs me to be again."

"Kara Danvers," Her kyrptonite colored eyes are piercing as she gazes at me intensely, and her red lips curl into a beautiful smile that stops my heart. "Supergirl may save this city, but YOU are my hero."

I can't help it, it's like happy electricity is coursing through my veins and pure joy has shocked my heart! I pick Lena up, holding her in a tight hug, and spin us around. My feet lift off the floor before I realize what I'm doing and I hold her still, hovering and twirling around the kitchen. The sound of her laugh and little squeal as we float higher makes my heart feel lighter than it has in weeks.

"You are my hero Lena Luthor!"

She laughs whole-heartedly and kisses me deeply, only making me happier. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever had the honor of touching. Lena grins widely as I gently land back on the hardwood kitchen floor and deposit her safely on the ground. She kisses my cheek before stepping out of my arms, still smiling.

"Now come on superhero, you must be starving."

As if on cue, my stomach starts to grumble, making us both chuckle. "Always."

Lena makes two plates, one with considerably more pancakes than the other. Watching her dance around the kitchen in just an oversized t-shirt is truly the picture of domestic bliss. We sit at the little nook by the window, smiling at each other over glasses of orange juice and the little bouquet of plumerias at the center.

"Mhmmm, these are so good!" The pancakes are like little clouds of pure goodness and I quickly find myself stuffing my face like a little chipmunk.

Lena smiles and sips her juice, shaking her head. "You're too cute for your own good."

Blushing, I grin through a mouthful of food and try not to laugh. Lena just chuckles, clearly amused with my goofy antics. I swallow hard and look up at her. She's so beautiful, with the sun dancing across her sharp features and making her dark hair shimmer. "So, any plans today?" I'm secretly hoping she says no so we can spend the whole day like this.

"Unfortunately, I do have to stop at the office, at least briefly. My mother left a huge mess that I mostly dealt with from my laptop in the DEO recovery room while you were unconscious, but some more delicate matters require me to actually go in."

I try not to pout but Lena is too quick and I know she sees it. "Anything I can help with?"

"Not really, I'm just making 100% sure that none of the funds she used for Cadmus can be traced to L-Corp; I don't want the company name to be sullied anymore by her than it already has. And... during the DEO raid on the remain Cadmus cells, they uncovered the research for my mother's version of RedK. J'onn destroyed all of it but I would sleep better knowing that I've personally gone through every single server in the R&D department to make sure there is no trace of it hidden in the L-Corp system. I trust my employees but you never fucking know."

I'm sort of in awe of her dedication and it makes my heart swell for her that much more. "I'm sorry Lena, but thank you. I really appreciate it."

"It's for us both really." I reach across the table and lace our fingers together, smiling softly. My girlfriend smiles back but her grin is mischievous. "When you were unconscious, I got to know some of your friends better. They told me about your game night tradition and I was thinking... how about tonight? Or if you're not up for that we can always play a private game of strip poker?" The way she wiggles her eyebrows kills me!

"A very tempting offer..." Am I ready for game night? I do miss everyone but I'm still not fully comfortable yet. "Can I get back to you on that?"

"Of course!" Lena's smile is genuine but the alarm on her phone starts to go off and she mumbles under her breath. "Shit..." She types so fast even I have trouble following her movements, and she rolls her eyes. "Really, I don't know how they would manage without me for even one day! That was Jess, apparently one of our investors is having a hissy fit and will only talk to me directly about it. Looks like I have to go in earlier than expected."

She sighs and looks at me apologetically. "Meet me for lunch? We can order Nonaan's and maybe start an interview for an article? You're still the only reporter who writes me well." The hint of playfulness in her voice makes me grin and I immediately agree enthusiastically. It is about time I get back to reporting; it'll definitely be easier than learning to be Supergirl again. Maybe Snapper won't be too pissed if I come back with a Lena Luthor exclusive and 8000 words proofed and ready to go.

I follow Lena to my bedroom and lean against the door frame as I watch her get dressed. She's so graceful, the complete opposite of my clumsy Kara movements, and I'm mesmerized by the way she moves. Desire flutters low in my belly but I remind myself of the options for later tonight and settle on a deep kiss.

"Mmmm, I love you, darling." Lena kisses me until the blare of her phone becomes too loud to ignore, even then we kiss a moment longer. 

"Be safe, have a good day."

Lena waves, already talking into her phone as she leaves my apartment. A flop down onto my couch with another tray of bacon, having thoroughly enjoyed my morning and now looking forward to the afternoon. Why are the best parts of my day centered around food?

I turn on the TV and flip through the channels idly, planning on spending the rest of the morning with just my bacon and my Family Feud, but not even an hour in and something catches my attention. My skin tingles, goosebumps raising up across my arms and the back of my neck. My super hearing amplifies automatically and then I hear it, maybe 3 miles out, a little girl yelling for Supergirl.

My heart stops. Can I be the superhero she needs me to be? Can I trust myself not to do more harm than good? I suddenly find myself standing in front of my suit, fingers nervously dancing over the bullet proof fabric. I hear my name being called again, the little girl clearly filled with fear and desperation. I hear the screech of tires and the yell of men and then Lena's voice in the back of my mind: You are my Superhero.

My suit is on and the morning sun is hot on back. The air parts for me as I fly for the first time since the incident, gliding over my back and whipping my cape behind me. I am Kara Danvers, a Kryptonian refuge on Earth, a sister, a daughter, a reporter, a friend, and a lover. I am Supergirl, an alien, the protector of this city, advocate for all. And I am capable of amazing things.

My racing heart settles to a normal rhythm and my rapid breathing calms. I can do this. I can try. I can save her. I am a Zor-El, Supergirl, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this took me so long! Family was in town and then I had dental surgery so this chapter had to be put on the backburner. Thank you for your patience and sticking with this story as long as you guys have! I'm truly grateful for each and every one of you!  
> I'm thinking one more chapter, two at most, so stay tuned!


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